Veritas
by shondajr
Summary: My attempt at dissecting the enigma that is Annalise Keating by looking at her in law school. This of course, has a lot to do with her relationship with our favorite, Eve.
1. Flying Pens and New Friends

_**AN: Hi guys. I guess if you know me, it's from**_ _ **In Evening Light**_ _**but this is a new story I'm starting about Annalise and Eve in Harvard because I just had to. It's going to be a bit of a long multi-chapter, but that doesn't mean I'm stopping IEL. In fact, this story will probably tie together with it. It's just fun to imagine what they were like and how they met, ah, so cute! If you have suggestions for scenes you want to see , or prompts, or anything really, leave it in the comments or PM me and I'll try to add it in eventually.**_

 _ **Also, for visualization, I'm thinking of Annalise as a young Viola Davis, particularly how she looked in the canceled show**_ _ **City of Angels.**_ _ **And then, in my mind, Lisa is Vanessa Williams, Kim is Kimberly Elise, and Yvonne is Garcelle Beauvais. Eve is young Famke of course, so cute.**_

 _ **And that's all, hope you guys love this!**_

Annalise walks into her very first Torts class at 9:30. She thought she'd be early, but apparently she's just on time, because most of the seats in the room are full. This is a lecture class, one of the things she hates most, but she knows she belongs here. Harvard is where she belongs. She'd spent her undergrad years in a southern, small college that no one recognized the name of, and made it through on a scholarship so that she was able to remain debt-free. Until now. Harvard wasn't the type to give out scholarships, and she knew she'd be broke by the end of the semester, but she didn't care. She was going to make it. She'd gotten her degree in criminal law, because no one had ever told her what a bad idea that was, and she'd loved it every step of the way. Studying it taught her why people are the way they are and allowed her to understand pieces of people that she met that were usually hidden away. She knew things. And knowing things gave her the confidence to speak up. _That_ was why she belonged here. Because she had a voice and she wanted to be heard.

It would be hard to be heard in a class of 80 students, but she would try. She sits down in a seat close to the front, which is the only area that seems to have any free spots. As the room continues to fill up, she pulls out a notebook, and a pen, and then _Flowers for Algernon_ to read as she waits, but she is interrupted just as she opens the book.

There's a tall girl, thin, with dark, shoulder length hair that is carefully arranged in round curls. Her eyebrows are arched and she seemed put together, with her tight long-sleeved black top and grey plaid skirt. She shuffles into Annalise's row, her chunky black heels making a racket. Annalise winces as the girl plops down _right_ next to her and offers Annalise a wide smile. She notices that her lips are red.

"This seat isn't taken, is it?" she asks. Annalise shakes her head, closing her book.

"No," she answers shortly, looking away and putting her book back into her bag. She pulls at a braid. The girl nods and opens her bag, pulling out a notebook, a planner, a pen, and a pencil, before she pauses and turns back to Annalise.

"I'm Eve," she says, her voice kind. Annalise raises her eyes looks at her.

"I'm Anna-" she starts. She coughs. She had almost said the wrong name. She'd done that multiple times already in just the first week she'd gotten here. "I'm Annalise."

"Nice to meet you," Eve says, her smile not even wavering. She runs her eyes over Annalise after she smiles back. She doesn't seem like the type to try and standout, but she was was cute, in her collared dress. And she seems nice. Smart, of course; she had to be to make it into this class. She seems like someone Eve would have to figure out. Luckily, Eve loved making new friends.

Annalise has turned back to the front of the classroom, but she feels Eve's eyes on her. What does she want? And why is she staring so intently at her? Annalise picks up her pen and taps against the table, a nervous habit, better than chewing on the eraser at least. Unfortunately, she pulls back a bit too hard from a tap and her pen flies into the front row, hitting some guy in the back. He turns around, and Annalise looks down at her bag, pretending to rummage through it. When he looks away, she sighs and looks up, relieved. Next to her, Eve is fighting back a laugh.

"What?" She asks a bit defensively. Eve shakes her head, eyes dancing.

"Nothing," she says, grinning in spite of herself. "Here." She slides her own pen towards Annalise, who takes it carefully.

"Thanks," she says. Eve smiles. It seems like she is about to ask Annalise something, but then the professor walked in and everyone in the room quieted down and turned their eyes towards him. Annalise is thankful for the distraction. Something about Eve just was putting her on edge, and she did not like to feel on edge.

"I'm Professor Brudney," says the man at the front. "I'm going to call roll, so it may feel a little high school, but bear with me on this first day." And with that, he starts calling names. Most of the answers are present, but every now and then there's a bit of silence. Like what happens when he gets to the H's

"Anna Mae Harkness."

Annalise freezes. She doesn't know what to say, but that is not her name.

"Is there an Anna Mae?"

She looks at the professor, but his eyes haven't even left the book. He's ready to move on when she forces herself to stand.

"Annalise," she says. He looks up, squinting in the direction her voice comes from.

"I'm sorry?"

"It's Annalise Harkness, not Anna Mae," Annalise clarified. She looks steady, but she feels like she is shaking. The professor makes a note.

"I apologize Miss. Harkness, the book must be wrong," he comments, continuing.

"I guess so," Annalise says quietly, attempting to play off her nerves, as she sits. Next to her, Eve grins. Annalise pretends not to see. She pulls her book back out, and begins reading. There are a lot of names for the professor to call. When he gets into the R's, he calls Eve.

"Eve Rothlo," he said.

"Present," Eve says. Her voice is pleasant. Or more specifically, she seems like an overall pleasant person. She appears to always have a soft smile playing on her lips. And she gave Annalise a pen. Annalise is usually the type to stay to herself, and a small group of people, but she likes having fun. She left home to explore. To meet people like Eve. She thinks that Eve is someone she would like to get to know. She has to be nice. She notices Annalise looking at her and her smile widens before she turns back to look at the professor.

"You're staring," she states. Annalise's cheeks warm up and she fakes a short laugh.

"I am not," she says, looking back down at her book quickly. Eve giggles. It's a cute sound.

"You so are," she insists, pushing back a lock of her hair. Annalise looks up at her and scoffs.

"What makes you think you're so interesting?" she asks. Eve's smile holds fast.

"Well you wouldn't be looking over here if I wasn't," she reasons. There's a beat, and Annalise finally smiles, her white teeth gleaming. "Well it's true!" Annalise shakes her head and closes her book once more, tucking it back into her bag before she straightens her posture.

"Well, you're the one who came over here," she points up. "What do you find so interesting about me?" Eve begins to respond, but then in the front of the room, the professor speaks up, and she presses her lips together in a silent, tight lipped, grin. The two students both open their notebooks, but Annalise wants to hear Eve's answers.

"Well?" she encourages. Eve's smile widens just a bit.

"Everything," murmurs Eve. A girl in the front row with long braids turns around and shushes them, annoyed. Once she turns back around, Annalise rolls her eyes. Eve smiles. Annalise listens to the professor, who is just going over basic syllabus items. A 1/4 of the way through the class, she notices that Eve keeps glancing at her and so she looks over.

"What?" she says through her teeth, jotting down a note about a ''no tolerance policy'.

"Nothing," says Eve. She turns away, but she's still smiling.

* * *

After class, Annalise grabs her things and shuffles out of her row. Her legs are almost asleep from sitting so long in one place. After she leaves, she notices Eve jog up to her side.

"Are you following me?" she asks, trying to make a joke. Eve snorts.

"Please, we have all the same classes, how am I not supposed to follow you?" she asks, flipping her hair.

"What do you mean we have all the same classes?" Annalise asks, frankly a bit lost.

"We're all first-year law students," Eve. "Everyone in our group has the same schedule. That's how 1L is." She tilts her head a bit at Annalise, who is honestly a bit lost. "You didn't know?"

"You did?" asks Annalise. She hadn't known much about how this would work honestly. No one she knew had attended law school, or even college for that matter. She had done as much research as she could, but when she came in a few weeks ago, she still hadn't been completely sure about how things would work out.

"Well, yeah." answered Eve. She motioned to the crowd they were following. "I don't know, it was just kind of a given."

"Well, I didn't know anything about law school until college," admits Annalise. "I'm just trying to figure it out as I go."  
"I guess we all kind of are," Eve agrees as they head into the next building. They enter the first classroom on the left, going to their Contracts class. Eve looks like she wants to say something more, but someone says hi and pulls her away. Annalise glances back, wondering if she should wait before she decides it will be awkward and sits down in a seat close (enough) to the front of the room. After she sits down, she hears someone rushing over behind her, and she turns to see her roommate, Lisa, hopping over chairs to get to her. Annalise can't help but grin. She was the first friend she made when she got here, because she'd already been moved in when Annalise came. She was also one of the other few black women on campus, and for that reason alone, they had to stick together.

"I didn't know we were going to be in the same classes," she says, plopping down in the chair next to Annalise. "I didn't know how any of this worked." Annalise chuckles.  
"Me either," she admits, glad to know she's not the only one who's lost. Across the room, she sees Eve look over towards her. She smiles briefly, but pauses when she sees that the seat next to Annalise is already taken. But then, just as quickly she looks away and back at the person she's talking to, smiling in odd places. Eventually, she sits down when them farther back. Annalise almost wishes she had sat next to her again, but she had Lisa and that made more sense. They were already friends, it was easier that way. And of course, she could talk to Eve after class. Lunch was next, maybe they could go together. The thought makes her content, and as the professor comes in, she opens a new notebook and tugs on a braid. It's only her second class, but things are already looking up for her. Yes, this is going to be her year.

* * *

When the class ends, Annalise walks out with Lisa, and they were joined by her friend, Kim. Together, they seemed to make up the entire percentage of black woman attending Harvard for law in their year.

"So the food here is supposed to be alright," commented Kim, tucking her braids behind her ear. "I doubt it'll be better than Tech though."

"I hope they have vegan options," stated Lisa, going through her bag. She triumphantly pulled out a cherry chapstick and upcaps it. "You know I don't eat animal products," she says, mostly to Kim as she applies the chapstick to her lips. She and Kim had been friends since they both moved in around the same time, and were both members of the same sorority.

"I know," says Lisa, rolling her eyes. "That's why you don't have any meat on your bones." She pinches Lisa's skinny little thigh, getting Lisa to emit a squeal as she smacks away Kim's hand. Annalise chuckles at this, and Kim shrugs and pushes Lisa gently.

"What _ever_ ," she said, rolling her eyes and placing her chapstick back into her bag. "Where are we going anyways?"

"I have a meal plan for Dudley," Annalise said. She'd just assumed everyone else had too. "You all didn't sign up for that?" Lisa and Kim both shake their head.

"I didn't sign up for any meal plan," Kim answers. "I kind of just planned on using the kitchen." She's referring to the kitchen in the basement of their house, which was Hastings Hall.

"You cook?" Lisa asked. Kim nodded.

"I have been since I was 12," Kim said, "I ought to be pretty good at it by now."

"We'll pitch in on the groceries if you cook," Lisa offers, grinning. She nudges Annalise. "Right Annalise?"

"Right," echoes Annalise, who is now thinking about Eve and wondering if she's even going to be in the same place. "But we can eat in Dudley today, right?"

"Sure," answers Kim shrugging. "It's right over here anyways." She points to the building and together, the girls leave the sidewalk and head for the building.

When they get inside, it's not very busy. Lisa looks around at the options, turning her nose up.  
"A salad bar," she says, a bit dryly. "Great." She picks up a container as they pass it and starts assembling her lunch as Kim and Annalise get in line.

"See anything you want?" Kim asks Annalise, but she's looking around. She doesn't see Eve, much to her dismay. Disappointed, she looks back at the menu.

"Um," she starts. "I don't know, I'll probably just grab a sandwich or something." She trails off as she feels someone tap her shoulder, She turns, and their, like out of a dream is Eve, all smiley and nice.  
"Hey," she says quietly. Ahead of Annalise, Kim steps up in line and begins asking questions about the food. She's a bit of a picky eater, so Annalise definitely has some time.

"Hi," she answers, returning Eve's smile. Eve smooths down her skirt, looking a bit nervous although Annalise couldn't fathom why.

"Um, how did you feel about the last class?" she asks.

"It was alright," answers Annalise, shrugging. In the background, she hears Kim going _hmm, umm_. "Were you planning on eating here too?"

"I'm not sure, my friends, I guess, were just here" Eve says, glancing up for a second at the menu. But she looks back at Annalise rather quickly. "I mean, if you're eating here, we could eat together." She offers this casually, but Annalise sees her smile widen a bit. Annalise is about to say yes, but then Kim turns, having finished her order.

"I'll grab a table," she tells Annalise before taking her food from the cashier and stepping away. Annalise nods, then looks back at Eve apologetically.  
"I can't today," she says. She thinks for a second that she could just invite Eve to sit with them, but then she thinks better of it. Eve nods slowly.

"Oh, okay," she says. She sounds just a bit disappointed, and so is Annalise, but she doesn't know why, or what to say. She she says nothing. Eve looks down, then back up with a small smile. "I guess I'll see you in class."

"In class," Annalise confirms. Eve smiles and steps away, and Annalise moves up to order something to eat.

* * *

After lunch, she heads to her next class with Kim and Lisa. They all sit together in the front row. Lisa is a class favorite, and so this leads to a few guys coming over. They're all well dressed and smart, but none of them are Annalise's type. Throughout class, they whisper to Kim and Lisa until the professor speaks up and asks what's so interesting. Eve is sitting in the row across from Annalise. During the lesson, Eve catches her eye and smiles, but before Annalise can smile back, the boy behind her taps her and asks what her name is.

When that class is over, they all head to their last class for the day, Legal Research. Lisa and Kim make Annalise sit farther back this time, and as she listens to her fourth syllabus speech for the day, she starts doodling in her notebook cover, absent-mindedly. She's bored now, but she knows it will get better. As soon as they indulge in real material, she'll know for sure that she'd made the right decision. Things weren't that bad though. She'd made friends, found her place in a group. Lisa and Kim were nice, and they were funny. They seemed like they'd be good people to be around. There were also the guys, who seemed plenty interested in all of them. But she couldn't go there. She didn't want to be with one. Her past experiences with them hadn't been too good.

Her hand tightens around her pen, and she has to remind herself to breathe. She's pretty good at preventing herself from going into that dark place in her mind with all the memories she wished she'd only imagined, but sometimes she's slipped.

She sits still for a minute before Kim taps her.

"Come on girl, let's go!" she said. She gets up and Annalise looks around noticing that everyone else is leaving. Annalise quickly shoves her things in her bag and gets up, hurrying to follow Kim and Lisa out. She doesn't even hear Eve call her name.

* * *

The rest of Annalise's first week goes about the same as the first day. Her days are busy and full of quick lunches and hastily written notes as all of the teacher's ease out of introductions and dive right into the beginnings of their lesson plans for the year. She spends all of her time with Kim and Lisa, and sometime's Kim's friend Yvonne, and they're great people. Funny, driven. She had begun to think people like that didn't even exist anymore.

Then there was Eve, who she hadn't been able to talk to since the first day. Annalise wanted to see her again, at least a bit, but if they didn't talk, she didn't think she'd really mind. She had finally found a place where she fit in.

And now it was Saturday, and she, Kim, Lisa, and Yvonne were all sitting on the floor of Lisa's bedroom. The room was warm, and they were all sporting tank tops and shorts, for the first time this week looking like regular young adults, instead of Harvard Law students.

"Tell me why we hang out here when you have _air conditioning_ at North Hall?" Lisa asked, directing her question toward Kim and Yvonne, fanning herself with her hand.

"Because you're closer to everything," answered Yvonne. She laid back with a light _thump_ and groaned. Annalise winced.

"You're still cooking tomorrow, right?" asked Annalise to Kim. She was tired of eating the same food, in the same cafeteria.

"If you guys buy food, I'll cook it," Kim said, shrugging. "Not here though, in that hot little kitchen in the basement." Lisa makes a noise of approval.

"Guess we're going grocery shopping," she said, nudging Annalise, who raises her eyebrows.

"Who said I was going?" she asks. Kim and Yvonne giggle at this. She's usually the quietest one, and so any kind of outburst surprised them.

"I did," said Lisa, not missing a beat as she got to her feet. She searches through the mess on her dresser before she finds her wallet. "C'mon."

"Now?" asks Annalise incrediciously.

"Now," insists Lisa, reaching out and helping Annalise to her feet. She sighs in exasperation, but off course, she follows Lisa out. She grabbed her purse and keys, and slipped into some shoes, also taking the opportunity to slip a large t-shirt on over her tak. When she comes out, Lisa has also put on shoes and a denim jacket so big she has to roll the sleeves up. She smiles at Annalise. "Ready?"

"I guess," Annalise answers, not too optimistically. Lisa just rolls her eyes and opens the door, stepping out with Annalise.

* * *

After getting directions to the nearest bus stop, Annalise and Lisa had walked over, got on the next bus and headed towards the supermarket. By the time they got there and went in, they had decided on pasta, made with vegan noodles of course.

"Okay, so you're getting everything for the pasta, and I'll get sides," Lisa clarified as they picked up baskets. "I'll meet you back at the front when you're done."  
"Alright," said Annalise. She scanned the headers for each aisle, and head towards the one that said pasta. When she gets into the aisle, it takes her awhile to check and make sure she picks a spaghetti noodle without any egg products, but she does and gets a couple of packages before she ventures into the next aisle over and gets a tomato sauce. She thinks about it and goes into the spice aisle next, picking up a little bottle of oregano, salt, and pepper. That's what they put in pasta right? She takes a step back from the shelf to look up at all of the options. She thinks she sees parsley, which _sounds_ right, and she stands on her toes to reach for it, but she can't quite get it. She frowns, and moves a little closer, reaching for it again, but suddenly, another arm stretches over her and gets the container she's looking for.

"Thanks," she says grateful, although she's a bit embarrassed as she turns around and sees -

Eve. The surprise shows in her face, and Eve chuckles as she drops the parsley in Annalise's basket for her.

"Hey," she says.

"Hi," answers Annalise. She smiles a bit, too. Just a bit.

"Do you cook?" Eve asks, motioning to Annalise's basket. Annalise shakes her head and can't help but laugh a bit.

"Not at all," she says. "I have a friend who does. I'm just in charge of groceries."  
"I see," answers Eve, chuckling. Annalise notes her basket.

"Do you cook?" Annalise asks. Eve shakes her head furiously, pulling out one of the boxes from her basket. It's Cap'n Crunch cereal. Annalise grins.

"I can just take things out of boxes. Maybe heat them up." Annalise giggles at this. Eve smiles. She takes a second and flicks her eyes over Annalise. For a second, it almost seems like she's checking Annalise out.

"You look nice," she says. Annalise can't tell if she's poking fun at her. Suddenly, she feels underdressed, compared to Eve, who's wearing a pleated skirt and a fuzzy pink sweater like it's another day of class.

"You do too," she answers, as a safe retort. Eve smiles.  
"Thanks," she answers. They're quiet. Annalise remembers sitting next to Eve on the first day. The third day, Lisa had taken Eve's seat and Eve never said anything, so Annalise had gathered that it didn't really matter to her. But here they were, smiling at each other.

"You want to grab lunch together on Monday?" Eve asks suddenly. Annalise looks up, and eventually smiles.

"Sure."

"Okay," Eve says. "Well I guess I'll see you back on campus."

"Bye," says Annalise. Eve smiles and turns, and then she does too. For some reason, as she heads to get some cheese (which will have to be put on each individual plate), there's a smile on her face.

* * *

After she buys everything, Annalise goes to the front where Lisa is waiting.  
"I got garlic bread and salad, and also cauliflower, and some green beans -" she starts.  
"Vegetables," Annalise answers in distaste. She's thin, but she's never been a big fan of healthy eating. She just exercises a lot. Like, _a lot_. "Got it. What about drinks?" Lisa holds up her second bag.

"Orange soda," she said. "Not to be niggerish, but it's my favorite." Annalise cracks a smile.

"Want to buy some cheap alcohol?" she asks. Lisa chuckles, suprised by her sudden talkativity.

"7/11?" she asks. Annalise nods in approval, and together they walk down the sidewalk, headed to buy cheap alcohol.

When they drink it later, eating together at one the tables in North Hall it tastes cheap and burns going down, but Annalise doesn't mind. It fits. _She_ fits. For once in her life, she feels like she's actually in the right place.


	2. Cardigans and Diet Coke

_**AN: Hi guys, so this is the second chapter. Thanks for the feedback. Please leave ideas for scenes, I can't come up with everything on my own, although I have a basic story line in my mind.**_

 _ **The biggest question I have is do you think Annalise should be Wes's mom, or no. I honestly can't decide.**_

 _ **And lastly, I know you guys are worried about them breaking up. It'll happen of course, but that's so far away! There'll be plenty of fluff in between now and then.**_

 _ **Enjoy!**_

On Monday morning, it takes Annalise longer than usual to get dressed. It doesn't make sense for her to care so much about what she puts on. She knows that Eve is just another student. Just someone else she could be friends with. But knowing that she was having lunch with her made her nervous for some reason. Annalise had never been much of a networker, and so she figured that was it.

So now, she stood in her room, trying on almost everything she owned. The floor was littered with different dresses and skirts; since she had always felt too short to wear slacks. The only thing she'd really decided on was her watch. She sighed and pulled off the dress she currently had on and sighed, running a hand through her braids.

"Annalise," called Lisa from the living area. She was probably afraid they'd be late. "Are you coming?"

"Yeah, I'm coming," Annalise said, sighing. She looked in the mirror again. She'd already done her makeup, and that looked great. If only she could pick an outfit. "Be there in one second."

She sighs and goes to her closet and pulls out a burgundy, short sleeved, ribbed top and slips it on before picking up a grey skirt off of the floor and tugging it on. She threads a belt through the loops and buckles it before beginning to put on her socks.

"We have 10 minutes to make it to class Annalise!" Lisa warns.

Annalise is shoving her feet into her black Doc Martens. They're a little scuffed, but they're trending and she likes them.

"I'm ready," she says, grabbing her backpack from the ground and bursting out of her room. Lisa, looks a her and raises an eyebrow. That makes Annalise even more nervous. "Do I look horrible?"

Lisa shakes her head and steps in, pushing back a handful of braids that had fallen into Annalise's face. She grins a bit, and hands Annalise the scrunchie on her wrist.

"No, your hair's just everywhere," she says as Annalise pulls her hair back and places it in a high ponytail. "There, now you look great. Let's go!" Lisa might not seem like it at first glance, but she's very serious about school and her future career. Her careful planning was probably what had gotten her here. Annalise smiles a bit, and together they jog out, headed towards the stairs.

* * *

They manage to slip into class with 30 seconds to spare. Annalise sits down in her seat, and Lisa slides down the row and sits next to her. As Annalise pulls out her notebook, she feels eyes on her. She opens it before turning around to see Eve looking at her. She smiles a bit after Annalise makes eye contact with her and wiggles her fingers at her. Annalise smiles and waves back at Eve quicky. Eve's smile widens, and Annalise turns back to the professor, who is now talking. This teacher is one who calls on everyone and grades on the accuracy of answers. Annalise had read all of the pages assigned, and she was itching to be called on. She's ready. But it's almost like she's invisible. Throughout duration of the entire class, she doesn't get asked not even one question. When the period ends, she should feel relieved, but she's frustrated. She and Lisa collect their things before they get up and meet Kim at the door.

"I don't understand why I don't get called on," Annalise says as soon as they're outside. She tugs down her skirt a bit as they walk down the sidewalk.

"Are you complaining?" asks Kim, looking suprised. "When he called on me, I thought my heart was about to stop." Lisa laughs. "I'm serious! You all would have had to pick me up and carry me out."

"Didn't you do the reading?" Lisa asks pulling a compact mirror from her bag.

"Yeah, but Marcus kept calling and I just got a little distracted," she says. Annalise and Lisa _ooh_ in harmony and Kim rolls her eyes, but her cheeks are red. Marcus was one of the boys that sat with them in the next class.

"Well in Contracts, make sure you pay attention," Lisa says, nudging Kim. "We're a group of independent, educated, black sisters. We don't need men distracting us."

"Easy for you to say," says Kim, holding her textbook to her chest. "You have boys falling at your feet Lisa, it's not like that for me." Lisa shakes her head indifferently, but Annalise has to raise an eyebrow.

"They do pay a lot of attention to you," Annalise says. Kim nods, but Lisa raises her eyebrows.

"And when did you decide to break your vow of silence?" she asks, in feigned shock. Annalise scoffs, but backs off and looks away, holding her hands up in submission. But Lisa is only quiet for a moment before she voices her thoughts.

"Do they all really pay attention to me?" she asks. "Like, even Alex?"

"Alex?" Kim asks, voicing both her and Annalise's surprise. "That white boy?" Lisa pauses, but she smiles a bit.

"Yeah," she confirms, looking down at her friends with a small smile. They look at each other before bursting out into laughter. "Oh whatever, it's not _that_ funny!"

"Yes, it really is," says Kim, through giggles.

" _Independent, educated, black woman,_ my ass," says Annalise says quietly, unable to hide her grin. She and Kim laugh again, and now it's Lisa's cheeks that redden.

"You all are just childish," she says, stomping up the stairs to head into the building ahead of them. Kim rolls her eyes and starts to follow her, but Annalise feels her stomach growl.

"I'll be in class in a minute, I'm going to get a muffin or something," she calls to Kim.

"Don't be late, Annalise," Kim answers. Annalise checks her watch, glad to see she has twelve minutes.

"I won't," she calls as Kim enters the building. Annalise walks briskly to the closet cafe and gets in line behind another student, who's receiving a coffee.

"Thank you," they say, and Annalise recognizes the voice automatically. She perks up a bit.

"Eve?"

The girl turns around, and it _is_ Eve. Annalise can't help but smile and Eve smiles back.

"Hey," she says pleasantly, stepping to the side to prepare her coffee. Annalise orders a blueberry muffin and goes to open her bag for her wallet, but Eve steps in and hands the cashier a few dollars. "I've got it."

"You didn't have to do that," says Annalise, smiling a bit shyly. The cashier hands her a muffin and she takes it gratefully.

"I know," says Eve. She empties three creams into her coffee before stirring and placing a lid on it, and then throwing her trash away. Annalise studies her as she does this. She's wearing black slacks, a cropped blue top cardigan, a blazer, and a little gold necklace. She looked nice. The thought puts Annalise on edge about her own outfit. She wonders if it's okay, or what Eve thinks about it. But then Eve looks up with that little half smile and her doubts fade.

"No sugar?" Annalise asks after a second. They begin walking back to class together.

"Nope," Eve says, a small smile on her lips as she sips her drink.

"I can't do that," Annalise admits, shaking her head. "I hate the taste of coffee by itself. If I drink it, it has to be loaded down with sugar and cream." After her statement, she takes a bite of her muffin, which is heavenly. Eve chuckles.

"It's a drink, not a dessert," she chides playfully.

"Says who?" Annalise retorts. Eve has some way of making her speak up. It makes her nervous, but she also feels like she can let her guard down, if only a little.

"Touché," says Eve, giggling. Annalise smiles. They walk for a bit, and Annalise just seems to realize that they're actually alone, and having a conversation. It had happened at the grocery store, and here it was again. She felt accomplished for some reason. She hadn't been sure of how she was going to make friends, and everything was just falling together just right. Not for the first time since arriving in Boston, she felt a wave of satisfaction.

"So, we're still on for lunch right?' Eve asks carefully. Annalise nods, a smile on her face.

"As long as you don't try to pay again," Annalise says. Eve laughs.

"Of course," she says, running a hand through her hair. "Whatever you say." She pauses, and glances at Annalise, smiling a bit. For some reason, the action makes Annalise feel a bit nervous. It's the good kind though. The edge of your seat nervous, that happens on a rollercoaster or in a scary movie.

They reach the building. Annalise checks her watch. They made it just in time.

"So I'll meet you at the door, I guess?" Eve asks. For some reason, her cheeks are pink. "And then we can go somewhere?"

"Yeah, sure," Annalise says. She gives Eve a reassuring smile, and they step into class, immediately heading their separate ways. Annalise sits down in her seat next to Lisa, who looks at Annalise, and then her muffin.

"Who was that?" she asks casually, referring to Eve.

"Just someone I met the other day," answers Annalise. She couldn't say more after that, because the professor spoke up, but she wanted to. Because already, Eve felt like more than 'just someone'.

* * *

After class ends, Annalise gets up and heads towards the door, not even waiting for Lisa and Kim. She doesn't want to have to answer a ton of questions about why she's not going to lunch with them. As soon as she reaches the door, she feels a tap on her shoulder and turns to see Eve, smiling, her bag on one shoulder.

"You ready?" she asks. Annalise smiles back with a nod and they slip out, unnoticed by their separate crowds of friends.

"So, what place did you have in mind?" Annalise asks, a little shyly. Eve shrugs.

"I know this little by-the-slice pizza place," Eve answered, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear. It seemed like she fiddled with it when she was nervous. "I was thinking we could go there? It's not too far, and I'll drive."

"Yeah, that's fine," Annalise said. She didn't own a car, and for a second she was embarrassed. She wondered if Eve assumed she did, or if it even mattered if she didn't. Meanwhile, they were already headed across the street, where's Eve blue '94 mustang is sitting. She gets in on the driver's side and then unlocks the door for Annalise, who also gets in. "Nice car," she says, suprised to find it spotless.

"Thanks," Eve says with a small smile, tossing her bag in the back. Annalise follows suit before putting on her seatbelt. Then she watches as Eve removes her jacket and tosses that somewhere, revealing the short sleeved, tight cardigan she had on underneath and clicking on her seatbelt as well. Annalise can't help but note how well it fits her as Eve turns her head and pulls out of their spot. She's quiet as they continue down the street. Annalise sits her hands in her lap, a bit nervous, and looks out the window. She starts to speak up just as Eve does and their words run over each other's.

"Sorry," she says, laughing nervously. "You first."

"Um, what kind of music do you like?" Eve asks, clicking the radio on. She fiddles with the dial a bit, waiting for an answer with a small smile.

"Anything really," Annalise answers automatically, because she doesn't want to say the _wrong_ thing. She thinks Eve knows why she says this, because she rolls her eyes.

"No, what do you _really_ like?" she insists, and Annalise has to chuckle. She shrugs.

"I don't know, pop I guess, but old stuff too," she says, playing with her fingers. "But the top 40 is what I usually listen to on the radio."

"Okay," Eve says, smiling. "Now I don't feel so bad for wanting to hear _The Sign."_ Annalise chuckles as Eve turns to a popular pop station before placing her hands on the wheels. Mariah Carey is playing.

"You like Ace of Base?" Annalise asks, trying to keep the conversation going so they didn't have to sit in that awkward silence again.

"They're okay," Eve says nodding. She looks over at Annalise before continuing. "What were you going to ask earlier? Before I interrupted." Annalise's smile widens at this.

"I don't know, just how you were liking the classes," Annalise says lamely, regretting it immediately after the words come out. She wishes she had something more interesting to say.

"They're pretty okay," Eve answers, mulling over it in her mind. "The people could generally be more interesting, but besides that, it seems like it could be a good year. I like the material."

"I do too," Annalise says, nodding a bit. "And the people I met are good friends, you know? I'm surprised that everyone's so nice."

"You aren't used to nice people?" Eve asks automatically. She glances at Annalise, who's smile decreases slightly.

"I guess I'm not," she answers, a bit quieter than she had been. Eve purses her lips.

"Well," she says, after a pause. "I'm pretty nice I guess. Maybe you can add me to the list of good friends you have." Annalise's smile automatically comes back, broader than it was originally. Eve smiles back a bit, now the bashful one as she pulls onto the street the pizza place is on. They're quiet while she parallel parks, but then after she hops out with a joyful, "Alright!" and they walk inside.

The shop is titled "Angelo's Pizza" and it smells like heaven to Annalise, who had been forced skip breakfast because of how long it had taken her to pick an outfit out this morning. She and Eve get in line to order together.

"You see anything good?" Eve asks Annalise, who shrugs, biting her thumbnail out of habit before she realizes what's she's doing and crosses her arms.

"I'll probably just get a slice of pepperoni," she reasons. "And a coke. You?"

"I'm guessing just cheese pizza and a diet coke," Eve says, looking up at the menu. She fiddles with her necklace. "But I kind of want to try cheese fries. Do you mind sharing with me?" Annalise smiles.

"No," she says. "That's fine."

When they get to the front of the line, Annalise orders first, putting the cheese fries on her tab, even though Eve nudges her to try and convince her otherwise. After she pays, Eve orders and pays and they sit in a little booth to wait and get their food

"So," Eve says, a small smile on her face, sitting across from Annalise. Annalise notices that she leans in on the table, elbows down, eyes wide open.

"So," Annalise repeats. "You said that the people in our class could be more interesting. What did you mean?"

"Like, it's all the basic Harvard story," Eve says, rolling her eyes a bit. "Went to some good private university, mainly Ivy Leagues, got their master's, top of their class, and then came here." She shrugs. "Boring, ordinary. And it makes me feel out of place. I never got my master's. Didn't go to an Ivy League."

"You didn't?" Annalise asks. Eve shakes her head. Annalise is surprised to hear that Eve could ever feel out place, when she seemed to fit in everywhere. She knew how to talk to people. Knew how to make them like her. Annalise wanted that. "Well, I didn't get my master's either. Or go to an Ivy League. But I'm sure that's not surprising."

"It is, actually," Eve says, watching Annalise carefully. Her eyes are warm, but calculating. "I don't know much about you." Annalise begins to respond, but then someone comes with their food and it smells just as greasy and cheesy as she expected, and she can't wait to dig in. She picks up her slice, which is awfully large, and watches Eve do the same.

"Same time?" she asks. Eve smiles and nods.

"1, 2, 3," she counts, before they both take a bite. Annalise burns the roof of her mouth, as well as her tongue, but it's worth it. She moans into the slice, causing Eve to giggle, her mouth full.

"It's so good," Annalise says as she sets her slice down, chewing. Eve nods, and then swallows.

"I know," she admits, before picking up a cheese-covered fry and popping it into her mouth. She makes a noise of approval here. "And these are great too." Annalise swallows her bite of pizza before trying a fry. She nods, agreeing with Eve.

"They are good," she says. As she chews Eve takes a sip of her soda.

"Okay, so back to you surprising me and all," she says, playing with her straw with a small smile. "Tell me something about you."

"What do you want to know?" asks Annalise, looking up from her plate at Eve and those focused brown eyes.

"Um, maybe where you're from? What college you went to? Your major?"

"That's a lot of questions," Annalise points out.

"C'mon," says Eve, prodding her on with sad eyes and a small nudge of her foot under the table. Annalise rolls her eyes, but she begins to talk.

"I'm from Georgia. A small town, not many people, no one knows where it really is. I got a scholarship to an equally small college called Piedmont. I majored in Criminal Justice. Minored in Psychology. Learned how to read people," she shrugs. Eve is listening intently.

"Okay so, when you read me, what do you see?" she asks playfully. Annalise scoffs and shakes her head, laughing a bit, but Eve grins and doesn't let up. "Really Annalise!" Annalise pauses and watches her before speaking up.

"I don't know much about you yet," she begins, but Eve urges her to continue. " _But_ you seem nice. You make friends easy. Get along with lots of people. And you seem really smart. You always have good answers when you get called on in class. You speak well too."

"Anything else?" Eve asks, smile widening. Annalise plays with her thumbs before nodding.

"You're pretty, but you don't flaunt it like some people do. People notice you anyways, though. They like you," she says slowly, thoughtfully. Eve is quiet, thinking her words over for a second.

"You think I'm pretty?" she asks when she speaks up. Annalise rolls her eyes and begins to interject, but Eve laughs and shakes her head. Annalise likes the sound. She smiles a bit more, and Eve smiles back before blushing and looking down. "Thanks."

"You're welcome," Annalise says, taking a fry. Inside, her stomach is full of butterflies and she doesn't quite know why. Eve coughs, her cheeks are still pink, before looking up.

"Okay so you went and got your degree. What about after undergrad? You didn't go to grad school, so what did you do?" Eve asks, picking up her pizza and taking another bite.

"I worked," Annalise said, smiling a bit. "I was a legal assistant for this little firm in Gainesville. It was nice, but I wanted my own. I mean, I did paperwork, helped out other people. I guess I always just... wanted more."

"I can understand that," Eve answers, an understanding smile on her face.

"What about you though? What's your coming-to-Harvard story?" Annalise asks. Eve chuckles after taking a bite of her food.

"Well, I'm from Maryland," Eve starts. "And I wanted to get away, so I went to NYU. Loved it of course."

"That's a great school," Annalise notes. Eve nods.

"But guess my major," she says. "Something completely random." Annalise raises a brow, eating another fry.

"I have no idea," she answers, which is true.

"Philosophy," she says. This does surprise Annalise, because it is a bit random.

"Philosophy?" she repeats to Eve, who nods though a bite of food.

"Philosophy," Eve confirms. Annalise laughs a bit, and she laughs back. "It was interesting! And anyways, I minored in Journalism, because for some reason I thought that would help me get a job."

"Did you work after?" Annalise asks.

"I wanted a job in a law firm, but I just couldn't find a good one that was hiring. Not a philosophy major, right out of college. But my dad works for a publishing company, and he always told me I had a job with him if I wanted it. So I went back to Maryland for a little while and he made me an editorial secretary."

"Did you like it?"

"I hated it," Eve stresses. "I didn't want to write, or assist. Not like that. I wanted to be a courtroom. The money was good, but I guess it just wasn't the environment I wanted, you know?" Annalise nods. "I didn't like the people either. My dad's people. Like there was this really douchebag guy that always asked me out, and I had to tell him no every Friday."

"Wasn't your type?" Annalise asks, sipping her drink. Eve scoffs, shaking her head.

"I guess you could say that," Eve said raising her brows as she takes another fry.

"Well, what is your type?" Annalise asks, through another bite of pizza. Eve chuckles and swallows.

"Women," she says, so casually Annalise almost thinks she's just joking. But Eve doesn't laugh, she just flicks her eyes up at Annalise and grins. "Surprised?" Annalise's face quickly floods with confusion. She stutters a bit before she finds words.

"No," she says, raising her eyebrows. "I mean that's cool-"

"You should see your face," Eve says, looking at Annalise. "I didn't mean to freak you out."

"You didn't freak me out," Annalise says, shaking her head. "You _did_ surprise me though," she adds, a bit bashfully. "Sorry for responding so weirdly."

"You don't have to apologize," Eve says, somehow still smiling softly. "You weren't expecting it." She pauses, playing with her uneaten pizza crust. "I'm just going to guess that you're straight then?"

"Yeah," Annalise answers, but her voice sounds oddly unsure, even to her. Eve seems to be expecting this, and she nods.

"Figures," Eve says, a bit vaguely. Annalise wants to ask her what she means, but then she continues. "Well, at least I don't have a crush on you or anything." She says this as she grabs the last fry, and it could be a joke. Annalise laughs softly, but when they make eye contact, they hold it for a little too long, and the butterflies in Annalise's stomach feel a little too strong. Eve looks away before clearing her throat.

"Um, you ready?" she asks, checking her watch. "We have 30 minutes left before class."

"Yeah, I'm ready," Annalise says. They stand and collect their trash before throwing it away and stepping outside. Eve unlocks her car and they get in, quiet. Eve doesn't seem able to stand the silence, and so after they both buckle their seatbelt, she looks over at Annalise.

"This was fun," she says as she sticks the keys in the ignition and starts the car. "We should do this again soon."

"We should," Annalise says, smiling again. "But before, I'm going to have to work this off in the gym or something. I don't usually eat like that." She chuckles, and after Eve pulls out of her spot, she responds.

"You work out?" Eve asks, turning the corner.

"Whenever I have time," Annalise answers. "Do you?"

"I run," Eve says, sounding proud. "Maybe next time we want to hang out, we can just go to the gym together."

"That sounds good," Annalise says, leaning against the window. "Then I don't have to explain to Lisa and Kim where I keep going for lunch." Eve chuckles.

"Yeah," she says before clicking on the radio. They drive in a comfortable silence for the rest of the ride, which was short to begin with. _The Sign_ plays.

After they get back to Harvard, Eve parks on the street and then cuts the car off. She unbuckles her seatbelt and turns, grabbing her backpack but apparently deciding to leave her blazer off. She and Annalise get out of the car, and start walking to their next class.

"I feel like today has been very informative," Eve says thoughtfully. Annalise laughs a bit.

"Such as?"

"Like you're from Georgia," Eve says. "And you claim to know how to read people."

"I _can_ ," Annalise corrects, getting Eve to giggle.

"Maybe I can read you," Eve says, challenging her.

"Oh, really?"

"Yes, really," Eve says. "Do you want to hear?"

They stop outside their building.

"Sure," Annalise says, already feeling the regret. Eve looks over her face before starting to speak.

"You are very focused," Eve starts. "Confident, but not confident enough. Smart, of course. You're funny, and you like to laugh."

"Is that all?" Annalise eggs.

"You like me just as much as I like you," Eve says. It's out before she can think about it. Annalise seems to consider this, before she turns and goes in the building, Eve by her side. Really, she's thinking about Eve specifically saying that she _did not_ have a crush her. But it seemed like she hadn't been telling the entire truth. "Annalise?" Eve calls, a step behind her.

Annalise doesn't stop until they get into the classroom, which isn't completely full yet. Eve stands in front of her, and watches her eyes.

"What are you thinking about?" Eve asks carefully. Annalise watches her for a second before responding.

"You're a horrible liar," Annalise says, her voice certain. Eve laughs, able to relax before she purses her lips. Annalise smiles.

"You're supposed to be straight," Eve says. Annalise shrugs.

"I am."

Eve smiles. She doesn't believe her. Annalise knows it, but she doesn't care.

Then they both go back and sit in their respective seats. Things are different now they. They both know it. And the thought makes Annalise nervous and excited and happy all at once. She doesn't have any intentions of doing anything with Eve, not really. But the conversation is nice. Her presence is nice. Like everything else, it fits.

At least for now.


	3. Hot! Teenagers and Treadmills

_**AN: Okay, so I watched the winter finale and I am freaking out man, oh I am so freaking out. Did anyone else notice that in that last scene Annalise had braids? I felt so great, because that's how I described her, and I thought that no one else would notice but PhilYouUp26 did, and so shoutout to you!**_

 _ **Also, so I have a rough plan in mind for who Annalise is to Wes, and I'm going to put that in this story, but put IEL on a break. I don't mean to disappoint, but I just don't know how to write anything after the last 2 episodes and keep them anywhere near cannon.**_

 _ **So instead, I have this, which I'll be able to update hopefully more than once a week, depending on my schedule. It's starting slow, I know, but please just stick with me.**_

 _ **I have Annalise and Eve's relationship mapped out, from their first kiss, to their first holiday together, and the first time they say 'I love you'. (Spoiler) None of those are in this chapter, but I hope you love it anyways! This chapter is written from more of Eve's point of view at the request of**_ _ **Xenite**_ _ **, who also noticed the braid thing and is amazing and a faithful reviewer.**_

 _ **Such a long AN, ik. You're fantastic if you read through all of that. Here's the next chapter!**_

Eve had never met someone like Annalise.

That was surprising, because she had met a lot of people. Unlike now, she had been shy at first, when she was young and in primary school. She had a half brother, but he was already in high school by the time she was 5. So at home, she'd felt much like an only child, which had it's perks, but also meant that she hadn't had much of an opportunity to socialize. And so she was a quiet girl, always bright, always with her nose in some book, until middle school, where on the second day some girls had come up to her empty table at lunch and plopped down right next to her, shaking the Jell-o on her tray.

"You're really pretty," one of them said, voice amiable. 12 year old Eve had judged her to be the leader. "Do you want to be our friend?"

And that was it. Her life had changed, just like that, all because of her young, round face that others seemed to find appealing. She didn't find herself to be out of the ordinary. In fact, she had always wished she looked different, more like her mother than her father, and when she was older her wish had been granted, but even when she was in junior high and felt awkwardly tall and gangly, people had still marked her as _pretty_. Living in a house with just her father didn't allow for much beauty advice. She didn't learn to use makeup until she was 16. In high school, they _pretty_ she always received turned into "hot!"- a word that her first and last boyfriend had used to describe her whenever she asked what exactly made him like her. He was a jerk, but he was also "hot!" (according to her peers) and she was supposed to feel _lucky_ to have him. She'd lost her virginity to him, and regretted it every day after.

After four months, Eve broke up with that awful boy. It had only lasted so long because her friends always insisted that she just give him _a chance_. Now, of course, she felt so stupid for listening to them, but back then, she hadn't wanted to seem overly different. She already had a habit of talking to and making friends with anyone and everyone, which her supposed 'best' friends found strange. They had such a strict social pyramid that Eve felt was oddly parallel to the caste system in India. She was the Bhramin of Lincoln High, and that meant that she was supposed to have a cool boyfriend, whether he was a jerk or not. It was hard for her to come out and say she had no interest in a boy with greasy hair whose only aspirations were to be a groupie for ACDC and whose greatest achievement was eating an entire large pizza in one sitting. And even after they broke up, she _definitely_ couldn't come out and say that she was beginning to feel that she had no interest in boys at all.

But it was true.

Eve noticed girls. She noticed their bodies, thought about dating them, and about what it would be like to be with one. But she couldn't explore something like that. Not in high school, with all of those standards, all of those people that she knew _watching_ her. There was so much disapproval focused towards the gay community, she could possibly be involved in it. She was a school figure too, in debate and volleyball and forensics, always making excellent grades, always networking with completely different groups of people. Always making them like her, but still always wishing she could be _honest_ with both them and herself.

These things, among others, only led her to study harder. She doesn't date anyone else, even though her friends demonize her for it. She didn't want to bullshit her way through another fake relationship. She just needed to get _out._ She made salutatorian at her high school and got accepted into NYU. She made it seem like she was sad to go, for her dad, but honestly, she was just so excited to leave and get to be _herself._

It's not so easy though. When she gets to college, she doesn't know how to just find a girlfriend. She learns that coming out doesn't solve all her problems. The dating pool is so much smaller than the straight one, and almost everyone she seems to like is straight or taken, but eventually she meets someone. And she's attractive to Eve, but she's not right. Their relationship is okay, but not great. It's more of a learning experience than anything. And after Eve gets out of it, she knows what she wants. Someone fun, who surprises her and makes her laugh. Someone smart enough to have conversations with meaning. Someone who like her for _her_ and who thinks she's more than "Hot!". And it's funny, because as soon as she decides on what she wants, she can't find them. She has relationships that seem to fall apart no matter what she does, and she decides that she can't waste her energy on every single one. She also begins to wonder if she's ever going to find someone, although that's not particularly her focus. It's her career. And her mental health and family life score pretty high too. And so Eve eventually, she told her father.

"Gay?" he says on the phone, after she tells him. "As in happy?"

"No, dad," Eve starts, swallowing. "Like-"

"As in you're attracted to women," he says, sounding much calmer than Eve had imagined he would.

"Yeah," she says slowly, piecing two and two together, although it surprises her. "You knew?"

"Of course I knew Evie," her father said on the other end of the line. "You are my daughter."

"How?"

"When was the last time you brought home a guy?" he asks in response. Eve remembers laughing. "Look, Eve. You're beautiful, and you're popular. Boys called the house and were tripping over each other trying to talk to you, and you never entertained one. I had an idea."

"You're not mad?" Eve asks, because really, that was what she was afraid of. She hadn't disappointed her father ever before and she didn't plan on starting then.

"No," Eve's father said. "I was surprised, but I've had what, 3 years to prepare for you telling me this? I love you. No matter what."

"I love you too," Eve said, almost tearing up.

"And Eve?"

"Yes?"

"If you do meet a nice girl, I'd love to meet her."

Eve had chuckled and wiped her eyes and promised that he would, if she ever met the girl. That hadn't happened yet though. Not at NYU. Not when she went back to Maryland. But then there was Harvard. And Annalise.

Annalise was someone who kept Eve on her toes. She had admittedly been a little cold when they first met, but she intrigued Eve. She was different, and Eve loved different. When they had lunch, and her words suprised Eve. She made her laugh. She profiled Eve with creepy accuracy after barely talking to her. And she's attractive. Oh so, so, attractive with her smooth skin and plump lips, and calculating eyes. And, she's probably (hopefully) interested in women as well. She seems to like Eve, she _flirts_ , like when she told Eve she was a bad liar. Funnily enough, the comment is true. Annalise is the kind of person who knows what she's talking about.

She seems too good to be true, but Eve just has to find out more. She wants to get to know her. She tells herself to slow down, but she thinks about Annalise so often that she stops trying to suppress it. She wants to spend more time with her. Answer the questions floating around. That's why she's here now, standing outside Annalise's door at 6 am on a Saturday morning. She had done some hunting to find out what room was hers, and now she was here, feeling crazy and ready to leave. But she doesn't leave.

She knocks.

She fingers the material of her workout shorts nervously. This isn't dumb right? She isn't dumb. She holds her breath and knocks one more time, a bit louder. There's a bump somewhere in the apartment and Eve raises an eyebrow, ready to ask if everything is okay, but then the door swings open and there's Annalise.

She's cute, her hair wrapped in a colorful scarf and standing in a faded t-shirt that has to be 3 sizes too big. But she looks grumpy, eyes full of sleep. She reminds Eve of a child, a thought that makes her smile.

"Hi," she manages to say. Annalise is rubbing her eyes, and when she stop and blinks up at Eve, she yawns before she can answer.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she asks. Her voice is hard, but more tired, and so Eve decides to ignore it. She is afraid that Annalise doesn't want to see her, but she also knows how quick she can be to warm up to her when given a chance.

"So, I'm guessing you're not a morning person?" Eve asks, unable to hide the beginnings of a smile. Annalise sees that she doesn't plan on going anywhere, and looks at her, her eyes repeating her question so that her voice doesn't have to. "I'm headed to the gym. Did you want to come?"

"No," Annalise says, shaking her head furiously. "The sun isn't even up, why should I be?"

"C'mon," Eve encourages. She's persistent if nothing else. "I'll buy you breakfast after." There's a pause. Annalise is considering.

"Pancakes?" she asks. Eve's smile widens automatically.

"Whatever you want, as long as you come." Annalise hesitates, but then she looks up at Eve and her brilliant smile and she decides to go for it. She steps back, opening the door wide enough for Eve to slip in, and then shuts it behind her.

"Give me a minute," she says, disappearing into a room that Eve assumes is her bedroom. She looks around and sits on the couch to wait; a smile plastered to her face.

* * *

Annalise gets dressed relatively quickly and after she comes out of her room, a bag with a change of clothes on her should, she and Eve leave the building. The gym is right next to Hastings Hall, and only a short walk on the sidewalk away. As they walk, Eve can't help but notice her spandex shorts and the way they fit, and as soon as she realizes that she notices, a pink blush rises to her cheeks. Annalise notes this, and turns to look at Eve, rolling her eyes.

"Stop checking me out," she says. Eve coughs, her blush darkening automatically, embarrassed at her own conspicuousness.

"I'm not," she answers, looking away. Annalise's unequivocal mask slips and she smiles for a quick second before she plays it off as a cough; feeling some odd sense of pride for have flustering Eve. They step inside the gym and head upstairs, where the aerobic machines are. Luckily, the only people they can see are some guys on the first floor lifting weights. Eve was smart to get Annalise so early.

"How did you know where I lived anyways?" Annalise asks, glancing at Eve, who shrugs.

"I asked around," she says a bit vaguely. In truth, she had asked almost everyone she knew. But Annalise wasn't someone everyone knew. She was quieter, a bit intimidating. Eve had really just gotten lucky, and ran into one of Annalise's friends last night at dinner. But Annalise seems to accept her answer, and she gets on a treadmill.

"How long are we here for?" she asks. Eve shrugs and steps onto the neighboring treadmill, adjusting her ponytail.

"Until we get tired," she answers, a grin on her face. She drops her bag next to the machine and Annalise does the same.

"Well then I'm already done," Annalise says. Eve chuckles and they both turn on their treadmills.

Early on, it becomes apparent that they have different running styles. Annalise turns her treadmill to 5 miles per hour and increases the incline, then begins running. Her pace is steady, her arm movements smooth. She has endurance; stamina. After her first two miles, she's sweating, and breathing harder, but still steadily; her eyes trained ahead.

Eve is not an endurance runner. She runs in bursts; turning her treadmill up to 7 miles an hour for 30 seconds, then back down to 3 for 2 minutes. Annalise watches this, and she tries to stay focused on her treadmill, but the lack of uniformity bothers her. Eventually, she has to speak up.

"What the hell are you doing?" she asks, flicking her eyes over at Eve, who is in the middle of a jogging at 3 cycle.

"What do you mean?" Eve asks, wiping her brow. "I'm running.

"Seems like a strange version," Annalise notes. Her tone is flat, but Eve suspects she's teasing. The hint of a smile she has gives it away.

"You burn more calories this way."

"Because you're trying to lose weight?" This is another joke. Eve has always been thin and tall. No matter how much she eats. She was lucky that way. She scoffs, and Annalise laughs although she feels as if she's wasting breath when she does so.

"Why don't you just focus on your own treadmill, huh?" Eve says, but her tone and her grin make it hard for Annalise to take her seriously. "You know, stay on your side of the gym?"

"Fine."

"Fine."

Annalise grins as Eve huffs and begins increasing the speed on her treadmill again. Then she's running, breathing too hard to talk, even though she has a million more things she wants to say.

* * *

After two more miles, Annalise decides she's done running. She stops the treadmill and reduces the incline until it's back to 0 before hopping off.

"Are you finished?" Eve asks, her breathing a bit ragged.

"Definitely," Annalise says, cracking a smile. She always felt good after working out. She was beginning to feel pretty glad Eve had gotten her out of her room this morning. Her Saturday mornings were usually spent in bed, alone. But being alone involved a lot of thinking, and she didn't like to spend much time thinking because she had a habit of remembering the worse things. Now, she sits down on the ground and begins stretching as Eve begins to slow the treadmill back down until it stops. "You know you didn't have to stop just because I did."

"My stopping had nothing to do with you. I'm ready to go to breakfast."

Annalise smiles, and Eve does as well. She steps to the water fountain and takes a long drink before grabbing her bag from it's place on the floor. She stands and stretches both legs briefly before Annalise finishes and grabs her bag as well.

"Showers?" Eve asks. Annalise nods before she stretches. A couple of her joints pop in retaliation, making Eve wince.

"What?"

Eve shakes her head.

"You aren't one of those people that always crack their knuckles and things? Because that would ruin this." Annalise chuckles as they make their way down the stairs and into the locker rooms where there are showers. She wonders somewhere in her mind what Eve means by _this._ Whatever it is, she likes it. Of course, she hadn't been lying exactly when she told Eve she was straight. But Eve was different. She made Annalise feel different. And that was something to at least consider, right?

"I don't crack my knuckles," she says. "I just haven't been running in a while."

"I couldn't tell."

Annalise offers Eve a small smile as she sets her things down on the bench. Eve follows her lead before undoing her ponytail and running a hand through her dark hair.

"I did cross country in high school," Annalise admits, pulling a towel and flip flops out of her bag. "And ran track." She doesn't quite know why she's sharing, but it feels right.

"You must like to run," Eve comments. She pulls off her tank top, and then her shorts, noticing that Annalise quickly averts her eyes. Either she's polite, or embarrassed. Eve wonders which one it is.

"I guess. My mama says I run for two reasons. For sport, and to avoid my problems." Annalise's slightly southern accent comes out on the word _mama_ , and she hates that because it's something she's been trying to hide since the ninth grade.

"What problems are you running from Annalise?"

The question is casual, but Annalise doesn't know how to answer. She pulls off her top to stall, revealing a sports bra and a toned midsection. Next are her spandex shorts, sticky with sweat. She sighs in relief after they're off and notices Eve glancing at her.

"You're still checking me out," Annalise comments. She's embarrassed just a bit, but also something else. She feels pride which is odd and not one of the emotions she feels on a daily basis. Eve starts to protest, but Annalise turns and pulls her bra off before wrapping her towel around her chest and pulling off her underwear after. She turns to fold her undergarments and notes Eve's blush as she pushes them into her bag before putting that on her shoulder as well.

"Stupid lesbian," she murmurs, putting on her flips flops before brushing past Eve and heading to the showers. After she leaves the row of lockers, Eve runs her hands through her hair and tries to get her nerves straight, Annalise _had_ flustered her. She surprised her again. And that only intrigued Eve more. She smiles softly and pulls off the rest of her clothes and wraps her towel around her before slipping on her own shower shoes and heading after Annalise.

When she gets to the showers, Annalise is already showering. Eve gets in one a few stalls down and puts her bag in the hook of the door before hanging up her towel and grabbing her shampoo and soap. She then moves the shower curtain and steps in, turning the water up until it's lukewarm. She hums as she cleans herself out of habit, showering quickly. Annalise is on her mind again, but what's new really? She said she was running from her problems. What problems did she have? She'd avoided answering the question this time, and Eve would let it slide, but she wanted to know. She wanted to _know_ Annalise because oh God, did she like her. And it seemed like she liked her back, with the teasing and smiling. She told herself not to rush, because she could be awfully impatient, but she just had so many questions and so much hope. She had always wanted to meet someone like Annalise, and she never thought she would, but now, she was here, in her grasp. She sighs softly. She can't mess this up.

After washing her body and her hair, Eve turns the shower off and steps back into the dry area of the stall. She dries her body and hair with her towel before putting her hair in a bun and getting dressed in a black skirt and a white top before stepping out. When she got to their row in the locker room, Annalise was already sitting down on the bench, pulling up her slouch socks over her leggings. Eve sat next to her as she pulled out her own black pair of knee high socks and put them on.

"Where'd you get this?" she asks, pausing to finger Annalise's oversized Harvard hoodie.

"Bookstore," answers Annalise, putting on her shoes.

"I like it," says Eve. For some stupid reason, Annalise smiles.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."

Annalise finishes tying her shoelaces and looks up to see Eve. She was technically staring at Annalise, but not in that way that Annalise hated. Not like she was an animal on display at the zoo. Or a fish stuck in a tank. Just like...like she really liked her. No one had ever looked at Annalise like that before, not really. Deep down inside her, her stomach is fluttering.

"What?" she asks quietly.

"Nothing," Eve says. Annalise raises an eyebrow, and she concedes, looking away. "You're just really cute."

 _Cute_. The word surprises hasn't been called that since she was 10 years old. She, by definition, is not a cute person. She is guarded, and hard, and cold. Quiet, calculating, pragmatic. Not pretty. Definitely not _cute._ But Eve says that she is, and when she looks back at Annalise, it looks like she means it. Annalise searches her eyes for clues, but they're the same as they always are. Big and brown and honest. Trusting. It looked like she was telling the truth. Annalise wanted to believe that she was telling the truth. But she just couldn't. Not yet. She glances away, fixing her bag to give her hands something to do.

"Yeah, right," she says, her tone playful. But she feels shaken.

"I mean it," Eve says. Annalise can almost hear the frown in her voice, she doesn't even have to turn around to see it. "Annalise?"

When Eve doesn't receive a response, she raises her hand, reaching out to touch Annalise's face. As soon as her fingertips brush her skin though, Annalise jerks back like she's been struck.

" _Don't"_ she says, in a harsh voice that's not her own. She raises a hand to the spot on her face where Eve almost touched. Eve nods, looking both shocked, and apologetic. Annalise doesn't know why she freaked out, but something felt wrong. The touch was too intimate. Too close. The last time someone touched her like that...

 _"Come here, Anna Mae,"_ coaxes a rough, scratchy voice in her head, a small piece of one of those memories she's spent so much time trying to forget. But she can't forget. She'll never forget. Those words. Those hands on her skin; which now feels like it's crawling. She feels the urge to jump back in the shower and scrub, and scrub. But she knew it wouldn't be any use. No matter how many baths she took, or how hard she scrubbed, she always felt just as dirty and just as used as she had that night.

"Annalise?" says Eve, pulling her back. _Anna Mae, Anna Mae_ is still in her head though, faint, but overpowering.

"Are you okay?"

Annalise sighs harshly, clenching her hands into fists. She takes a sharp breath and uses every ounce of her willpower to push that voice out of her mind.

"Annalise, you look sick."

Eve is watching her, looking afraid.

"Is this my fault?"

She shakes her head, and forces herself to look up at Eve. She smiles a smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes.

"No, I'm fine. Aren't you hungry?"

Her tone was forced, but light, and made it clear that she wanted to move on. Eve is concerned, but she nods slowly, playing along.

"Starving."

* * *

An hour later, they're sitting in a booth with full stacks of pancakes sitting in front of them.

"This is enormous," Annalise says, picking up her fork. She honestly doubted she'd be able to eat more than half.

"This is heaven," Eve corrects, smiling up at Annalise. She has picked up the maple syrup as is completely drenching her pancakes in it. Annalise grimaces. She's never had much of a sweet tooth. "Let's go for it."

And so they eat.

And eat.

And eat.

By the time they're finished, Annalise is stuffed to the brim and oddly sleepy, with a few pancakes still on her plate. Eve hasn't eaten very much, but maybe just because Annalise is on her mind and she's too busy thinking about questions she'd like answers to. Annalise hasn't been speaking much though, not since the incident in the locker room. Eve hopes she hasn't ruined everything.

"Looks like it'll storm," Annalise says, glancing out of the window. Thunder rumbles somewhere in the distance.

"Yeah," agrees Eve absentmindedly. When a waiter comes over, she's still looking at Annalise, but again, what was new?

"Did you both want boxes?"

"Sure," Eve answers with a nod, dragging her eyes' away from Annalise.

"And will the checks be separate, or together?"

Eve answers 'together' just as Annalise answers 'separate'. The waiter looks helpless. Eve clears her throat.

"Together," she says, clearly. The waiter nods, and steps away. When Eve looks back to Annalise, she frowning.

"You didn't really have to buy me breakfast," she says.

"I said that I would," Eve says, shrugging. She doesn't understand why Annalise would be upset, but she is. "And I wanted to"

"Why?"

"What do you mean why?"

"Why do you try to buy me things?" Annalise asks. Her eyes are distrusting, suspicious. "I don't need charity. Or welfare, or whatever you want to call it."

Eve laughs at this, breaking Annalise's mask again, if only just for a second.

"It's not charity, Annalise," she says, looking up at her. And her eyes give her intent away. She means it. "I just..." She starts, blushing now slightly. "Like you. And I want to show that, I guess."

Annalise doesn't want Eve's words to affect her, but they do. Her face softens. Eve is so good at saying the right things.

"You don't have to buy me things to do that."

The words come out of her mouth before she can sensor them. Eve nods.

"Fine. But just let me get this, okay? I said I would."

"Fine."

When the to go boxes for their food come, they are looking at each other again. The waiter also sets down their tab, which Eve grabs. She looks at it briefly before opening her wallet and grabbing a few bills and setting them on the table under the check. After, she starts adding her pancakes to her box. Annalise does the same.

"You ready to go?" she asks, but she's interrupted by a large _BOOM_ of thunder coming from outside. And then the sky opens up and it begins to rain. Annalise watches this and groans.

"Great," Annalise mutters. "That's just great."

They had walked from campus to here. It had been a nice long walk when they came over, but there was no way they could go back with the weather like this.

"Crap," Eve says in the same tone. "Maybe we can just wait it out? Or at least wait until it lightens up."

Annalise begins to answer but there's a flash of lighting.

"I don't think that's the answer."

Eve thinks. They're only two blocks from her apartment, but she doesn't know if Annalise will want to go. She still seems upset and withdrawn. She frowns slightly. She's been saying all of the wrong things. She has to fix it.

"You can come to my apartment. It's not too far."

Annalise looks at Eve. She wants to decline, Eve can see it in her face. And she almost does. But then she looks outside at the worsening storm and the people bustling back and forth on the sidewalk; trying to get home.

"Fine."


	4. Mock Trials and Smeared Mascara

_**Hi guys, this is a bit of a longer chapter. Included is the mock trial mentioned in 2.01. Shoutout to the always amazing ariainthestars who inspired me to talk a little about race in this chapter. Hope you all love it.**_

When Annalise and Eve burst into Eve's apartment, they're both absolutely soaked. The rain had not lightened up even a bit for them. Annalise, not used to cold, or even very heavy rain, is physically shivering in her thin hoodie. Eve's hair is drenched and curling around her face in loose waves. She flicks on a light and then shuts the door behind them. She's freezing, her teeth chattering, but her attention immediately goes to Annalise.

"God, you're freezing," she says, her voice apologetic. "I'm so sorry. Let me get you something dry to wear."

She rushes into the hallway, Annalise trailing after her, looking around. Eve's apartment is nothing like the dorm room she has back on campus. It's large for one thing, and tastefully decorated in blue and grey tones, with furniture that look too expensive to belong to a full time student. The ceilings are high, and there's art on all of the walls. Landscapes mostly, all beautiful. All in all, it was a good representation of Eve herself. Beautiful, but not so much that the beauty looked fake and out of place. They reach the door that must be Eve's room and step in, and then Annalise has to catch her breath again.

The room is _gorgeous_ and so _Eve_. The walls are a dark navy, with white crown molding. Her bed is humongous compared to Annalise's little single. The bedding is off white, and the upholstered headboard is large. It looks so inviting. The rest of the furniture matches, also off white. There's another painting, and multiple mirrors. There are also flowers. Real white and pink roses sitting on her dresser, her desk. Annalise is amazed. Who keeps their room looking like this? Just like a picture, pulled straight out of 'Home and Garden'. Annalise suddenly feels embarrassed about letting Eve into her apartment earlier. It wasn't like this, not at all.

Eve doesn't even notice Annalise's gawking. She's too concerned about her health, too busy rummaging through a dresser.

"Here you go," she says, sounding pleased. She pulls out a large NYU sweatshirt and a pair of socks, then hands them to Annalise. She opens another drawer and grabs pair a boxer shorts, which she also tosses over. Annalise turns them over in her hand.

"Are these yours?" Annalise asks. Eve isn't sure if she's teasing, but she's glad to hear that she's not mad, at least not extremely.

"Yes, they're mine." She answers, straightening up to look at Annalise, pushing some of her wet hair out of her face. Her nose is red. Annalise thinks it's cute. "I get them from the men's section to sleep in."

"Oh."

"They're comfortable!" Eve protests, noting Annalise's doubtful look. She looks up at Eve when she defends herself, and shrugs.

"Alright," she says, although she doesn't look very sold. Eve offers her a little crooked half smile, and then there's a pause as they watch each other. Eve looks away first, her cheeks turning pink for absolutely no reason.

"I'll um, let you get dressed."

She steps out after she says that, closing the door behind her. It's not until she's in the hallway that she realizes she's soaking wet, with no change of clothes. She sighs, not wanting to step back in on Annalise. While she waits, she decides to turn the thermometer up. Her nose is running a bit already.

When Annalise comes out, she has her wet clothes draped over her arm. Eve's taller than her, and so her clothes are a bit long on her. She's pulled up her braids into a high ponytail, maintaining the cute girlish theme she's had all day (at least in Eve's mind).

"Here, I can take those."

Eve takes Annalise's clothes carefully.

"I'll wash and dry them for you, and you can get them before you leave."

"You have your own washer and dryer?"

Eve chuckles, nodding slightly.

"Yeah. I'll take care of it as soon as I change."

Annalise just seems to notice that Eve is still wet. She nods rapidly, suprised at how long she waited. She must be freezing.

"Of course, sorry." She steps to the side.

"You can make yourself comfortable," Eve says, stepping into the room. Her arm brushes Annalise's and she swears she feels a shock. "I'll be out in a second."  
She shuts the door after stepping in, and Annalise looks around once more, taking a breath. Eve was out of her league. She doesn't know why that thought occurs to her, but she suddenly feels small, and in over her head. How could she afford something so expensive? Annalise could barely afford her current room situation. She had spent the entire last 2 years _preparing_ for this. Working, creating a plan, signing up for scholarships. She had budgeted for every single month this year, stretching and giving up what she could so that she'd have enough. A small loan had been taken out in her name - something that she hadn't wanted to do but was necessary. But she was making it.

Then there was Eve, she thinks as she sits down on her couch, which is (of course) impossibly soft. She had the money for this, and for those clothes, and for school, and then the funds to be able to offer to buy Annalise things as well! No, they were _not_ even in the same sphere. And it shouldn't matter, because they are just friends. The income of your friends didn't matter. But even though she's doing her best to deny it, Annalise can't seem to think of Eve as just a friend.

As Annalise is mulling over Eve, Eve is mulling over her in a such a similar way it's almost ironic. As she strips down to her undergarments - a lacy cream set - her mind is engulfed by the enigma that is Annalise Harkness. She had made Eve feel like she was angry with her, but that anger seemed to have faded for the present, at least. But Eve had to make sure she did the right thing. Said the right thing. She held herself to an impossibly high standard, in everything she did, including her relationships. This led her to be quick to blame herself for problems, and slow to stand up for herself.

And while she didn't know exactly what was going on between her Annalise, she knew that she liked her. Really _liked_ her. Maybe she was rushing, not even thinking about becoming friends first. It was just so easy to forget that she hadn't know Annalise for longer. Their conversations were easy. She made Eve smile.

Like now, as she decides on a blue and red flannel pants to slip on. She's smiling like an idiot - at nothing but the floor because Annalise is on her brain. She puts on a black baby tee as well as a pair of thick socks before putting her hair up. She should dry it, really, but she doesn't want to waste time on that when she could be out there with Annalise. She grabs all of their wet clothing and carries it out of her room, and down to the end of the hall, where the washer and dryer are. She sneezes before she dumps in some detergent, followed by the clothes, before shutting it and turning it on. And then _finally_ she can head out back to the living room, where Annalise has turned on the TV.

"Anything good on?" Eve asks, stepping into the kitchen. She covers her mouth to cough, then grabs two waters from the fridge.

"Not really."

Eve steps back into the room to see that Annalise has decided on _Full House_. She smiles a bit before sitting down next to her on the couch, her legs tucked underneath her. She offers Annalise a water. Annalise takes one before looking at it. It's Evian. She shakes her head ever so slightly. Yes, Eve is out of her league.

"This is a really nice place."

Eve looks up at this comment, oblivious to Annalise's thoughts.

"Thanks," she says, smiling a bit. "My dad pays for it though. I can't really take credit."

There are so many things Annalise can't relate to in that sentence that it's no use even bringing them up. She chooses to focus on something she can relate to.

"You live alone?"

"I had a roommate. She's moved in with her boyfriend a while ago though, so we have the place to ourselves."

Annalise is surprised that Eve is implying she would stay here for the weekend.

"I'll leave as soon as the rain stops," she says. Eve frowns, but nods.

"Yeah, of course."

They're quiet as the watch the last few minutes of the show. As it ends, Annalise looks back over to Eve. There's still so much she doesn't know. And something has sparked her curiosity.

"What do you normally do on Saturdays?"

Eve looks up, thinking for a brief moment.

"Homework," she admits. "Sunday is a lazy day." Annalise offers her a small smile.

"I flip those," she says, sheepishly. "Are you ready for Tuesday? If you're going then of course."

Tuesday would be their first mock trial. It takes placed in the second period of the day, and it's something Annalise has been waiting for since she first got to Harvard. The entire class will eventually do them, but she'll be going on Tuesday, based on her test scores. The students with the 5 highest grades thus far had been scheduled to pick the cases they wanted to work with first, and then they had been ordered randomly by case. Everyone had a part in their own case, as well as at least one other case. Annalise had been 3rd in the class, and she knew that Eve had been 2nd. The case Annalise had picked was a murder that was claimed as a self-defense, and she'd be arguing the defense. She'd started as soon as she got home last night, and she even had her files in her bag now. She was ready, this was the opportunity she'd wanted.

"I'm not going until Friday," Eve says, sounding a bit disappointed. "I'm guessing you're going Tuesday?" Annalise nods.

"Gotten far on it?"

"I've got the basis of my argument. I need to look at the witnesses again, a little more carefully, develop the case more."

"I should probably start on that," Eve admits. She glances at Annalise, who actually looks eager. "You wouldn't want to look at both cases now, would you? We could help each other out."

Annalise's mood seems to have improved a great deal, because she nods pretty quickly.

"I'd love to."

* * *

Eve quickly learns that Annalise is going to be a very good lawyer. She's critical and involved, armed with a highlighter and a red pen as she attacks the case study packet they've been given. They call out questions to each other, and Annalise can always answer Eve's.

"I need to discredit a witness who doesn't lie for a living."

Eve's case involves a boy who has allegedly been raped by a Catholic priest. She's on the prosecuting team, and her prime witness is another priest who works with the first.

"Priests lie all the time," Annalise says casually, determinedly. She knew people. Understood how their minds worked, for the most part at least. And she could tell when they were lying. " _People_ lie all the time."

"That's not true; not everyone lies a lot," Eve says. She believed in black and white, not grey. Of course some people told white lies, but those didn't count, not really. There were liars of course, but then there were honest people.

"Everyone lies."

"No they don't," Eve insists. "I haven't lied to you."

"We've known each other for all of three weeks."

"That's 21 days of telling the truth. 504 hours of not lying."

"You're good at math." Eve shrugs.

"Don't change the subject," she says, sniffing. She has a tickle in her throat now, which is awfully irritating. "What makes you think everyone lies?" It's Annalise's turn to shrug now.

"They just do. Everyone I've met has." She says this matter-of-factly, not even looking up from the document she's combing over, but Eve frowns.

"I won't."

Annalise finally glances up, looking over Eve's face. To be honest, Annalise has noticed that she always seems to have unbelievably pure intentions. Things don't stay that way though, at least not from her experience.

"You really believe that, don't you?" she asks, playing with her pencil. It shouldn't surprise her, but it does anyways.

"Of course," Eve says, tilting her head slightly. Her eyes are focused on Annalise. Annalise has to look back down.

"We'll see," she says. Eve watches her for a second before she remembered how they got on this topic in the first place.

"But a priest," she says, looking at her sheet. "What would he have to lie about?"  
Annalise doesn't hesitate before answering.

"Priests have a record of liking little boys. Is he lying about his sexuality?"

Eve looks at her paper. Annalise's explanation fits into the story. She looks up to say thank you, and notices that Annalise isn't paying very much attention. Or at least, she's trying not to appear too interested in the subject.

"Do you have experience with that?"

"With what? Liking little boys?"

"Hiding your sexuality."

Annalise looks up to find Eve studying her. She purses her lips together before shaking her head and looking back down at her paper.

"No," she says. "There's nothing to hide. I'm straight."

"Shame." Eve says slowly. Annalise pauses, then she looks up. Her mouth is grim, but she looks excited somehow. In her eyes maybe.

"You have lied to me," she states, confidently. "You almost got me. I almost forgot, but you did."

"I did not!"

"You did." Annalise nods. She looks awfully sure of herself, but Eve is confused.

"When?"

"At lunch on Monday. You said that you didn't have a crush on me."

Eve starts to correct her, but her cheeks flush. Annalise breaks out into a rare and generous smile, which makes Eve have to laugh softly. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes.

"You're just not going to forget that, huh?"

"Well you _said_ you hadn't lied."

"I'm sure you've lied to me too then," Eve says. She's trying to hide her smile, but failing.

"I don't think that I have," Annalise answers, shaking her head.

"Because you're definitely not into women," Eve says, her voice sarcastic, but she also feels insanely hopeful. "Or me, namely."

"Not that I know of." Annalise says. "I really think your crush on me is affecting your ability to judge my character fairly."

Eve opens her mouth to protest, but she doesn't have an argument to fight back with.

"Whatever," she says, looking back down at her paper. Her cheeks are flaming.

Annalise laughs too. It's a nice laugh, one that makes Eve's stomach flutter. Eve hadn't denied her statements.

For some reason, she was glad.

* * *

For the rest of the day they study. Eve finishes their clothes as well. The rain lets up, but Annalise stays. Eve is so glad that she stays. It's nice having her here. Being able to joke and call out questions and get answers that make her think. Not everyone can do that. Have adult conversations that actually make Eve _think_.

For lunch, they snack on the only food that seems to be in supply: Cap'n Crunch. For dinner Eve calls and orders a pizza; half cheese, half pepperoni. It's sits on the coffee table now. Eve is on the floor leaning against the couch, her papers spread out in front of her; a grayscale fan of black and white.

"Okay, so thanks to your help, I've now constructed a solid argument on how Father Hammond is a perverted, gay, rapist that should definitely be found guilty," she says, extremely satisfied. When Annalise doesn't answer, she turns to see that she's fallen asleep in her spot on the couch. Her arms are folded and her head is slumped to one side. Eve smiles softly, nodding to herself. They had been up since 6, and Annalise had been tired since the beginning; of course she had fallen asleep. Eve rearranges her papers neatly and puts them back in their folder. Then, she stands up as quietly as she can, and heads to her bedroom. She sets her papers on her desk before grabbing a soft throw and bringing it back to the living room. She drapes it over Annalise carefully, tucking her in gently so that she doesn't disturb her. She's _so_ cute. And so amazing for that matter. Eve doesn't pray, but she is hoping with everything in her that _they_ are what she's been missing.

She leans down slowly, a brushes a braid out of Annalise's face. Subconsciously, she bites her lip. After a second of hesitation, she leans down and presses a light kiss to Annalise's forehead, before stepping away and heading to her own room.

 _Please, please_ she thinks, although she doesn't know quite who she's asking. _Please let her like me too._

* * *

Eve is an early riser. Annalise is not. So when she wakes up, Eve is already in her kitchen, eating a bowl of cereal.

Annalise is a bit distorted at first, and she goes through those first few seconds of not know where she is or whose blanket she's under. But then she blinks a few times and hears Eve humming and see remembers the case studies and the flirting and smiles.

Then of course, she tries to move her legs and remembers the gym with a slight groan.

"Annalise?"

Annalise forces herself to get up and follow Eve's voice into the kitchen. Eve smiles that infectious smile when she sees her and Annalise had to smile back.

"Good morning," Eve says, setting her bowl of cereal down. Her throat is sore now, rather than just ticklish, but she tries to ignore it. She meets Annalise's eyes then flicks them away quickly.

"Good morning," Annalise says. She rubs her left arm a bit nervous before noticing Eve's cereal. "You don't ever get tired of that stuff?"

Eve follows Annalise eyes and smiles a bit sheepishly.

"No, not really. Did you want some? We also have Frosted Flakes." Annalise chuckles. Eve's doing that cute look away and blush thing, and just being so plain _nice_ that it's hard for her to be on edge. Especially not when she's standing in her clothes, that smell just like her - of perfume and cookies.

"Frosted Flakes would be great."

Eve nods and heads to the cabinet containing bowls before grabbing on, then a spoon from a drawer. She sets them on the counter, followed by the cereal and milk before she speaks again.

"How'd you sleep? I mean, I was going to offer you the bed, but you fell asleep and I didn't want to wake you." Annalise shakes her head.

"No, your couch was fine. It's oddly soft," she says as she helps herself to the cereal. "Thanks for the blanket. And for letting me spend the night."

"No problem."

They're quiet for a second as Annalise hands the cereal and milk back to Eve, who puts them in their respective spots before grabbing her own cereal and beginning to eat again.

Annalise eats a few bites of her own food as well before looking up at Eve.

"Thanks for your help last night."

Eve laughs at this, shaking her head.

"My help? Annalise, you did all the helping."

"You helped me too," Annalise insists. Eve just chuckles.

"I was just here."

"Maybe that was enough."

Eve smiles. And hell, it's infectious. Annalise smiles back. She doesn't know how Eve does this; open her up with just a few smiles. But she's not complaining. It's nice to let her guard down once in awhile.

Eve finishes her cereal and sets her bowl in the sink, then rinses it. When she turns back to Annalise, she speaks up.

"Your clothes from last night are ready for you, too. We can walk back when you finish if you want. Or you can shower here or something..."

Annalise shakes her head at the last part.

"I can shower when I get home," she says, not wanting to be anymore of a burden than she already is. "Thank you. For everything."

Eve gives her a small smile.

"You're welcome."

She hesitates before looking away a bit.

"I guess I'll go get dressed."

She sounds a little melancholy, like she doesn't want to leave Annalise. But maybe Annalise is just being optimistic.

"Alright," she says, and Eve slips out of the kitchen, leaving Annalise to her thoughts.

She thought she was straight. She honestly had, although she had never even thought about exploring any other options. And to be honest, she'd never had sex with anyone, male or female, for different reasons. But Eve was different from anyone else she's ever met. She smiled 90% of the time, and that made Annalise smile too. She was funny. And she was beautiful. Annalise felt bad for thinking about her looks so often, but Eve was _beautiful._ And she seemed to like Annalise. Actually like her, for her. It didn't make sense for her to. Annalise was cynical, and not as smiley (at least not with other people). She didn't have great social skills and she wasn't even slightly pretty. Their lives were also completely different. Eve had money, something that always seemed to evade Annalise her entire life. From when she was a child and sleeping in a large bed with her 4 other siblings, to now when she had to budget every cent to make it through school.

It didn't make sense for Eve to like Annalise.

But Annalise wanted her to.

Maybe because she was beginning to like her back.

* * *

After Annalise finishes her food, she gets dressed as well and then she and Eve take the walk back to campus. It's pleasant, and they talk about going to the gym again. Eve gives Annalise her number, just in case she wants to make plans, and Annalise does the same. By the time they get back to Annalise's room, there's an almost clown-like grin stuck on her face.

"I guess I'll see you tomorrow," Eve says. She's awfully happy.

"Yeah," Annalise confirms, smiling back at Eve shyly.

Eve turns her head before covering her mouth to cough slightly and Annalise frowns just slightly. Her voice was beginning to sound hoarse.

"Are you catching a cold or something you think?" she asks, her voice sounding concerned. Eve shakes her head.

"No, I'm fine, it's just a tickle," she says. Annalise nods. "Nothing to worry about."

But it is. Because that night, when she tries to go to bed she can't fall asleep because she's coughing so hard. She'd gone and gotten herself sick. Seriously sick; coughing and sneezing and all. Her throat feels rough and is aggravatingly sore and she knows she should stay home come Monday, but she goes to class anyways.

Annalise and everyone else in the class notice that she's sick in their first class, she's coughing so hard. Annalise can't come up and talk to her until after their second class. Annalise also has a bit of a sniffle, but she knows that she can't feel anywhere near as bad as Eve. Her face is flushed. Annalise suspects she's running a fever.

"You've got to go home," she says, watching Eve's face as they walk. Eve nods weakly. "Do you want me to drive you?"

"No, I'll be okay," Eve says. She says goodbye to Annalise before turning and heading to her car, which is parked on the street. Annalise isn't so sure though, and so when she gets home at the end of the day, she calls Eve.

"How are you holding up?"

Eve smiles on her end. It had surprised her to hear Annalise on the other end of the line. It she wasn't mistaken, it was almost like she cared about her.

"I'm okay," she says. She had taken a Tylenol and laid down, and although her throat was still aching, she felt better than she had earlier in the day, at least a little. "I don't know if I'm going to come to class tomorrow though."

"You probably shouldn't," answers Annalise. Lisa knocks on her door. She wants the phone, and Annalise knows it. She and Alex have been talking lately. Annalise usually doesn't mind if they talk all night, but she'd been worried about Eve.

"I don't want to miss your trial."

Annalise almost laughs when she hears that this is what is bothering Eve.

"Don't worry about me," she answers. "Just get well, okay?"

She sounds a lot more assured than she feels. When she walks into their Procedures class on Tuesday, her hands are shaking. When she sits down in her seat, Kim notices. She reaches over and squeezes Annalise's hand and smiles.

"You're going to do great," she says. Kim is one of the nicest people Annalise has ever met. She offers Annalise a smile, which she returns. In the front of the class, their professor steps up to the podium placed in the center of the room.

Professor Davis is not Annalise's favorite person. He's fat and white with a face that's permanently red and little hair. If anything, he's set in his ways. He's one of the people that doesn't call on Annalise anymore than they have to, and he has a confederate flag displayed proudly on one wall to put his Southern heritage on display. Funnily, his confederate flag is placed directly under the American flag, as if they represent the same thing.

Annalise doesn't _hate_ him though. He grades fairly enough and it seems as though he's able to put his opinions behind him at least for the two hours of class they have him for.

Now, he clears his throat before speaking. The room is arranged in the in the style of a courtroom; with tables for both the defense and the prosecutors, and a chair at the front for a witness. There is also a long bench for the jury. Then there's Davis's podium at the front, which he stands behind, looking at the class critically.

"As you all know, today is the first mock trial of the year. The case today is Robertson vs. Moore. Representing the plaintiff, the family of the late Mr. Christopher Moore, will be Joseph Lowe, and representing the defendant, Ms. Emily Robertson will be Annalise Harkness. The witnesses, clients, and jury all know who they are. Please report to your seats at this time."

Annalise stands up after this and makes her way to a seat in the front. She looks at her competition, who is the epitome of everything a Harvard student _should_ be. He was preppy and sharp, quick to answer every question he was asked. But he could be cocky, which was a trait that Annalise could definitely use against him. He settled into his seat. Next to Annalise sat the girl who would be playing the role of Ms. Robertson. Annalise hadn't bothered to learn her name, and she didn't decide to do that now. She wouldn't be doing very much anyways. A nervous excitement was spreading over Annalise. She was eager to start.

"For today's purposes, I will be both the judge and the final member of the jury. Remember that the entire purpose of today is to evolve your ability to talk to people. To make them believe what you're saying. This case could go either way. It is up to _you_ ," Davis says, eyeing Annalise at this time warily. "To paint the crime and find who is guilty. Proceed."

He taps his gavel, and the case begins.

* * *

Annalise believes the case goes extraordinarily well. She needs practice talking to juries for sure, but she knows her stuff. She has looked at this case from every angle, explored every argument her opponent could make and therefore shuts down any slick connections Joseph could make before he even has the chance to open his mouth.

She's better with the witnesses. She knows how to see people, even characters, for what they are on the inside. She gets called out for badgering more than once but that doesn't matter. She knows what she's doing. The only time something seems out of place is when she catches Davis's eye as Joseph is cross-examining her witness. He doesn't even seem to be listening to Joseph's argument though. He glaring at Annalise with some emotion she doesn't recognize in his face. He looks away though as soon as she notices, and she tries her best to ignore the uneasy feeling in her belly. She is doing great. There's nothing to worry about.

And so after both sides have made their final arguments and she sits down, her face flushed, she actually smiles to herself. She has this in the bag. And so after Davis takes the votes, and then writes down his own, she stands with Joseph (who looks physically drained) and waits to hear the ruling.

"The jury has found the accused, Ms. Robertson," beings Davis. "Guilty."

There are murmurs from around the class and Davis demands order. Annalise is in shock, a step behind. So after everyone quiets down, she's just speaking up.

"Guilty?" she says. There are chuckles somewhere in the back of the class and she feels her cheeks heating up, but she doesn't understand. "I don't see how-"

"There are notes in this folder that may provide you some clarity," says Davis tiredly. Apparently the matter is not up for discussion. He holds out a manilla folder, which Annalise is forced to step up and retrieve, in front of everyone. Various snickers come from the classroom, but Annalise is more focused on the document she's holding. She opens it right there in front of him and flips through the notes, written in scrawled cursive.

"The defense looks angry," she reads to herself, aloud. "Constantly yells at the main witness, practically badgering him to death until he was too nervous to answer any following questions." She looks up, _now_ angry.

"This isn't true!" she insists, a bit louder than necessary. Davis winces, and she bites her tongue. She's only proving his point, so she quiets her tone. "And I wasn't _angry_. I knew what I was talking about. I asked appropriate questions." She can't believe this. It would be different if she had expected to lose, but she didn't, and she's completely been taken by surprise. Annalise is not someone who responds well to surprises.

"I suggest you adjust your tone, Miss Harkness. Please remember that you are still in class," Davis says, narrowing his eyes. His patience is waning. "You don't have to take my word for it." He motions to someone in the back, and a man in a suit stands and makes his way to the front row of chair. He's too old to be a student. He has bright green eyes and blonde, unmoving hair. Davis smiles at her, and he gives him a small, polite smile before cutting his eyes over to Annalise.

"This is a representative from the D.A.'s office in Suffolk, Mr. Franklin Shield. He'll be sitting in on all of your mock trials and making notes. Mr. Shield, what impression did you get from Ms. Harkness?"

"She seemed upset. It seemed like her emotions got the best of her while she was out there. She also gave the impression that she was out for blood, which doesn't seem to be necessary in a case like this one, which is all pretend." There are more snickers from the class. Annalise can hear her own heartbeat pounding in her ears.

Mr. Shield has been addressing Davis up until now, as he turns to Annalise and meets her eyes.

"Personally, I was quite afraid of you. It's your voice, your stance, you expressions maybe. You're intimidating. It's almost as if you could have breathed fire over the entire jury."

The class thinks this is a hoot. Davis calls for order, but he seems to be restraining a laugh as well.

Annalise is mortified. Her eyes sting, the product of bitter tears coming to her eyes. But she's not sad, she's angry. She did not come here to be laughed at. She thought she had finally found something she was _good_ at. But here she was, being _laughed_ at for doing what she'd thought was an excellent job.

"I am _not_ scary," Annalise says, her voice fierce, in a last chance attempt at protecting herself. Her voice cracks, and she's kicking herself for showing any ounce of weakness.

"You are," says Joseph, from his spot at the table. "Extremely so."

"You shut up," Annalise says, only loud enough for him to hear. She's folded her arms, wrapping them around her body in an attempt to physically protect herself. Davis bangs his gavel and the sound bounces around the room.

"Miss Harkness, remember where you are," he says again, his words like ice. "And for that matter, remember _who_ you are."

That look is back in his eyes, but now Annalise recognizes it.

Hate.

The kind driven by ugly ideas: racism, prejudice. And she gets it. It's not her, it's her skin color. He's looking at her skin color. It's all he can see. The _black_ that cloaks her. The black he hates.

Davis seems to notice that she's pieced it together. Before she can speak up, he does.

"Class is dismissed," he says. Everyone hops up, ready for lunch, but Annalise is still glaring at him, still angry. Still hurt. He doesn't so much as bat an eye.

Annalise feels Lisa come up to her, she's the one that tugs her to her chair to retrieve her bag, then outside into fresh air and a bright sky that mocks Annalise.

"Annalise, it's okay," Lisa says automatically. Annalise feels herself walking, but she can't focus.

"He's an asshole," says Kim, on her right. Annalise hears herself speak up.

"I'm going to go for a walk."

Lisa and Kim murmur something to her, like _be safe_ , and then she's walking away. She doesn't know where she's headed, but she's walking. Quickly on the sidewalk, somewhere. To be fair, she should pay more attention. The streets are always busy and it's dangerous, but she can't completely focus because she keeps hearing everyone laughing and seeing that look that Davis had in his eyes, and that damn D.A. saying that he was afraid of her.

Annalise doesn't know where she's walking to until she gets to Eve's apartment. She walks inside and up the stairs, then down the hallway until she's standing at Eve's door. She takes a breath and knocks.

When Eve comes to the door, she takes one look at Annalise and her red eyes and the folder that she's clutching before speaking.

"What happened?"

Annalise has an answer planned out. She wants to explain what happened. Wants to explain that Davis is a racist man who can't judge fairly because of her skin color, but all that melts away as she looks at Eve's concerned face, and trusting eyes, and little pink nose. Her hands are shaking.

Annalise opens her mouth to speak.

She takes a breath.

And then she promptly bursts into tears.

Eve face softens immediately and she takes Annalise hand and pulls her inside, shutting the door behind her. For a second, she just stands there and looks at Annalise, not sure what she can do. Her first instinct is to hug her of course, but she is sick and Annalise does not seem to like physical contact. But here she is, crying and shaking like a leaf in front of Eve, just like a small child. Eve can't just stand here and do _nothing._

 _Oh, screw it_ she decides before stepping in and very carefully wrapping her arms around Annalise's waist. Annalise's body tenses briefly, but Eve strokes her back and she immediately relaxes into her, crying into her shoulder.

Annalise does not mean to cry. She tries her hardest not to, but suddenly she's all tears and big, blubbery breaths. Eve is rubbing her back, talking to her like she's small. And strangely enough, Annalise doesn't mind it. She isn't one for contact. Maybe it was because it was just a hug, but usually, any intimate touch sent her reeling into dark flashbacks. But now, Eve is here and touching her and it doesn't bother her at all. It reminds her of her mother. Back before she let those awful things happen to Annalise; back when she was her hero. Back when Annalise was Anna Mae, her baby.

"Annalise, you've got to tell me what happened," Eve is whispering, pulling her out of her thoughts. She loosens her hold on Annalise. Annalise wipes her eyes, and her hands come away smudges with foundation and mascara. She has to look horrid, but she's so shaken up that she doesn't even care. She let's Eve tug her over to the couch gently and they sit down. Annalise can't find the words, and every time she tries to say something tears come back to her eyes and she has to wipe them. Eve is patient, watching her carefully. Eventually, Annalise gives up and drops her bag before just handing Eve the now-wrinkled folder she's been holding in her hand this whole time.

Eve takes her time reading the documents after she opens the folder. It's uncomfortably silent for Annalise, whose tears have dried, leaving watery paths on her cheeks. She can tell when Eve gets to Professor Davis's notes, because she wrinkles her face up, and flips through the pages faster. She stops somewhere in the middle and closes the folder, dropping it on the coffee table in front of them.

"Annalise, I'm so sorry," she says, shaking her head. Annalise finally manages to find a voice, although it's quieter than the tone she usually speaks in.

"The class laughed when he made me come get the notes," she says. "And the D.A. was there. The actual D.A. He said he was afraid of me." She bites her tongue. Her cheeks are red again, she's gotten embarrassed just thinking about it. Eve is watching her carefully. Something seems to connect in her head, and she _giggles_. Actually fucking _giggles_. And for a second, Annalise thinks she came to the wrong person.

"Are you laughing?" she says, her voice hard, angry. "Because this isn't funny. I've been laughed at enough, and I'm not going to let you-"  
"No, I'm not laughing at you," Eve interrupts, but she's smiling. She shakes her head, and giggles. Annalise is frowning, so she tries her best to continue. "It's just that they're so _wrong_ about you. They don't know it but they're wrong."

Annalise doesn't say anything, so Eve tries to continue explaining.

"I mean, you're supposed to be scary right? And you're this twenty year old girl with her hair in a ponytail that comes to me and cries. I mean, how threatening is that? These are supposed to be grown men, and this is what they find scary? Not, I don't know, global warming, or the threat of communism. You." She's grinning. She starts to laugh. Annalise shakes her head at Eve, but eventually, she giggles too.

"I'm threatening," she says. Eve's laughter increases in volume. "Terrifying actually."

"No," Eve says, shaking her head. "You're cute. Oh _god_ you're so cute."

Annalise freezes at this statement. Eve doesn't seem to realize what she's said until after Annalise is already staring at her. Her cheeks turn pink, and she smiles just a bit.

"I mean, at least I think so."

This is something else that surprises Annalise. She's had so many things happen today that she should be able to face anything, but she was not prepared for Eve's words, or the way that she looks at Annalise. Annalise has to clear her throat before looking away and shaking her head.

"Davis is racist," she says.

"Shocker," Eve answers with a snort. Annalise smiles for half a second, but it fades quickly.

"He told me not to forget who I am," Annalise says. She's looking down at her hands, which are brown like the rest of her skin. "As if I could _possibly_ forget."

Annalise had not liked her skin tone for most of her life. When she was little, she couldn't understand why she couldn't be white like some of the girls in her class at school. They had pretty blonde hair, so different from the black, nappy, bush that Annalise had. They wore dresses with neat bows. The teachers liked them, always called on them. From a young age, Annalise had been taught that brown equaled bad, while white was good. And she tried her hardest to get rid of her black. She scrubbed her skin every night with the soap bar. Tried using talcum powder. And one night she'd gotten the beating of her life because she'd emptied out a flour bag and rubbed it into her skin.  
The brown never went away.

When she got older, she got taught the same thing. Brown was bad. But now, she understood that the brown on her skin wasn't something she could get rid of, or hide. She'd have to live with it. People treated her differently because of it, but that didn't matter. She was brown, and therefore bad, no matter how unfair that was.

Eve seems to notice the turmoil going on in Annalise's head and reaches out for her hand, pulling her back down to reality.

"Well you shouldn't forget who you are," she says slowly. "Because I think you're pretty amazing."

Annalise scoffs, but Eve continues anyways.

"You're smart, Annalise. Smarter than most of the people here. You're good at analyzing people, no matter what I say. You can be funny. You've got a drive that a lot of people don't have, and that's what's going to help you become the great lawyer you want to be. People like Davis and that idiot D.A. see that and they get scared because they know you'll be better than they ever were. That's what makes you scary. And that's okay, because people like that just need to get out of your way. But even if they don't, you'll make it. I'm sure you will."

Annalise looks up at Eve, who is watching her with those unwavering brown eyes. Annalise purses her lips and smiles. Eve smiles back. Carefully she raises one hand up and touches Annalise's cheek.

Annalise braces herself for the trigger back to past memories, but it doesn't come. Eve touches her and nothing happens. She let's out a breath she didn't know she was holding.

She'll have to go back to campus eventually, she knows that. But she doesn't check the time, or even move.

Instead, Annalise decides to focus on Eve; who she has subconsciously just decided to trust.


	5. Strapless Bras and More Sobbing

_**AN: Posting this after 1 in the morning, so there are probably errors I missed. Hope you guys like this. Thanks for all the reviews so far. x**_

Over the next month, Annalise and Eve become increasingly close until they're nearly inseparable. Making the decision to trust Eve was the hardest part for Annalise, but after that, things seem almost easy. They go to the gym in the mornings, and work together on homework on the weekends, making sure they stop at Angelo's pizza on the trip to Eve's apartment. Of course, they have their own separate groups of friends that they'd never dare try to mix, but when they aren't with them, they're with each other.

Annalise likes being with Eve because she gets her. It's not like it is with everyone else, where they have to take the time and break her down until they understand just bits and pieces about the way that she acts. Most people don't even do that, though, they just write her off as mean and introverted. Not Eve. She manages to look past Annalise's cynical tendencies and see her for who she really is. Her voice has a habit of coming out harsh, but Eve doesn't even flinch when she does, she just responds in her usual, gentle tone, and manages to diffuse any future explosion with soft words and a bit of a smile. If those don't work on their own, she reaches out and touches Annalise gently. Annalise - who used to freak out every time their skin touched - now immediately relaxes under Eve's hands.

Eve is still trying to figure Annalise out of course. She's not an easy person to understand, but Eve enjoys the process of peeling off her various layers. The first layer is tough, the Annalise presents to most of the people in her class. To Eve's satisfaction, this involves a few of the males in their group that seem to like Annalise. Annalise brushes them off so casually that Eve wonders if she even notices that they're interested in her. When she brings it up to Annalise, she scoffs.

"They don't like me," she had said, rolling her eyes.

"Yes they do," Eve insisted.

"They're just horny. Want to sleep with someone new."

Eve had coughed out a bit of a laugh and shook her head

"I don't think that's it," she answered thoughtfully. "There are plenty of other reasons why people like you."

She had never really tries to hide the way she felt about Annalise. They both knew that she liked her. But strangely, to Annalise, she had never tried to make a move to kiss her, or even touch her in a more-than-friendly manner. Because of this, she would doubt that Eve even liked her, but the way she smiles at her and blushes when she compliments her makes it almost impossible to think otherwise.

In actuality, Eve is just unsure about how Annalise feels about her. There are subtle things that she notices; for example, Annalise smiles more when she's around Eve. She cracks jokes. She also doesn't pull away if Eve initiates contact. Not anything major of course, but if they're on the couch, and Eve lays her head on Annalise's shoulder, she may tense up for a second, but she never pulls away.

These are little things and Eve feels desperate when she combs over them, looking for clues and that Annalise likes her, but she doesn't have much. Then there's the fact that Annalise insists that she's straight. Eve would believe her and forget about the whole thing, except sometimes she catches the way Annalise looks at her when she thinks she's not paying attention. And other times, there are little moments when they almost kiss, but don't. Like after Annalise's mock trial, when they had sat on the couch for what seemed like ever until Eve began to blush and pull away, but Annalise has stopped her. She'd leaned in just an inch, lowering her eyes, but Eve had turned her head.

"Still sick," she'd murmured, and Annalise had nodded and pulled back, looking embarrassed.

Eve knew that she had been sick and all but she wished she had asked for a rain check or just figured out Annalise's intentions or something. It seemed like her chances of getting Annalise to make a move again were slim. So Eve took what she had, and that was Annalise's friendship. Their relationship wasn't all pining and almost-kisses though. It was laughter. Annalise was fun. She studied hard and she was driven, but she could be fun. She how to make Eve smile until her cheeks hurt. And Eve things Annalise looks nice when she smiles too.

Eve is thinking about that now, as she watches Annalise. They're side by side on Eve's bed, working on analyzing a few contracts. They don't have class again until Tuesday because Monday is a holiday, but they were so used to doing their homework together that it had just become a habit. Eve is having trouble focusing, though. She keeps looking at Eve, and the way she taps her pencil when she's thinking. She adjusts her thoughts and decides that Annalise looks nice all the time. Eve focuses on her lips, which are parted slightly. She thinks they may be her favorite feature of Annalise's.

Annalise feels Eve's eyes on her and looks up. Eve smiles slightly when she notices that she's been caught. Annalise catches her staring more and more often the more time they spend together. At first she felt uncomfortable with her eyes always on her, but by now, she had actually begun like it. Maybe because Eve always gives her that little sheepish smile and sometimes she bites her lip. Sometimes Annalise wants to kiss her right then. Like now. Eve is biting on her bottom lip and Annalise is seriously reconsidering the straight identity she's been clutching onto. She sets down her pencil and frowns slightly. Eve can tell she's trying to make a decision. She takes a breath, but Annalise chickens out. She looks down slightly and sits up straight, trying her best to ignore the fluttering she feels in her stomach.

It's Eve turn to sigh now, and she looks back down at her own work, unwilling to even start on it. She's tired of work. It would be nice to have a break. She thinks about their options for a second before speaking up.

"Let's go out," she says suddenly, getting Annalise to look up. "You know, have some fun?" Annalise offers a dry chuckle, and Eve smiles a bit.

"I'm serious!"

"Where would we go?" asks Annalise, setting her documents aside. She runs a hand through her braids, getting them out of her face. Eve mmms to herself, thinking.

"Dancing," she says decisively. Annalise grins warily, looking at her.

"Dancing?"

"Yeah," Eve insists. "Like, at a bar or something. It'll be fun. We can have some drinks. You do know how to dance right?" She's teasing now, and Annalise knows it. She looks over at Eve with a small smile, contrasting against Eve's wide, eager grin.

"I don't have anything to wear," Annalise says, shaking her head.

"Nothing? You can borrow something," Eve says. Annalise chuckles. Eve is 6 feet tall, or nearly that anyways and maybe a size 4. "Not from me necessarily. Maybe one of your friends. Like, Lisa? She always looks nice."

Annalise is surprised to hear that Eve pays attention to Lisa. She doesn't understand why she would really. She thinks that she looks nice. What exactly does that mean?

Annalise's surprise shows a bit in her face, and Eve nudges her. It's a small gesture, but it's Eve's way of telling her not to worry. Annalise had been the only girl she'd paid any attention to after their first week of school anyways. Annalise looks at her, and eventually nods.

"Yeah, maybe."

"So you wanna go?" Eve is smiling again. Annalise can't help but smile back.

"Sure. It'll be fun." Eve giggles.

"I'll drive you home now, and then I can come back in an hour or so and we can walk somewhere."

"Alright," Annalise answers. She's beginning to feel excited about the possibilities for a night out with Eve.

* * *

After Eve drives her back to Hastings Hall, Annalise goes up to her and Lisa's room, unlocking the door and stepping in. Thankfully, Lisa is there. Singing loudly in her room to some song playing from her CD player. Annalise knocks on her door and Lisa shouts a "Come in!" before she lets herself into the room.

Lisa has a bag of salt and vinegar chips and a textbook, and an open bottle of nail polish. The nails on her left hand are painted a bright blue, and she blowing them. Of course, she is also playing music - Whitney Houston's How Will I Know, which she's singing along to (badly of course). She always multitasks in ways that Annalise can't. She wonders how Lisa gets anything done. Now, she runs a hand through her light brown hair.

"What's up?"

Annalise is suddenly shy. She hesitates for a second before finding the right words to say.

"I'm going to a bar with someone. And I just don't know what to wear-"

Lisa jumps up from her spot on the bed automatically, almost knocking the bag of chips to the ground.

"Why didn't you say so?"

In less than 30 minutes, Lisa has Annalise dressed and ready. They're standing in front on the mirror hanging on the back of Lisa's door. Annalise can't pull her eyes away from the girl in the mirror. She's in a tight black skirt and a matching off the shoulder crop top, with black platform sandals. The real focus of the outfit is Annalise's cleavage, which makes her a bit nervous. Annalise is wearing some awful strapless bra that she has to tug up, but she refuses to go braless, even with Lisa's advice.

"God, I'd kill for that chest," Lisa says enviously, grabbing a necklace from the jewelry box on her dresser. Annalise doesn't know about all that. Of course, she knows that she's not at all lacking in this area, but it's never been something she'd paid much attention to. Or maybe that was a lie. Maybe she paid a lot of attention to it, and always made sure it was covered so that no one else would. She never wanted to draw attention to herself. Never wanted boys to look at her and her various assets. Never wanted to give someone a reason to think-

Lisa gently places a gold chain over Annalise's head, letting it fall gently on her collarbone as she fastens it in the back before stepping to the side to admire her masterpiece.

"You look hot," she says approvingly.

"I don't know," Annalise says doubtfully. But she doesn't know if it would be worse if she did or didn't believe Lisa.

"You do," Lisa insists. She looks up at Annalise's makeup, which she also did. She has simply made up eyes, and her lips are a berry color, perfect for her skin tone. She cocks her head slightly, looking at Annalise's worried eyes. "Who are you going out with anyways?"

"Just a friend," Annalise says, shaking her head. She doesn't want to get into details, because honestly, she doesn't know what Eve is to her. She also doesn't know how everyone she knew would react if she became more than a friend. That's one of the thoughts that keeps Annalise from kissing her when she's biting on that damn bottom lip.

"Right," Lisa says, watching Annalise's face curiously. "But what friend. A guy?" Annalise shoots her a look, before deciding for some reason to be honest.

"No, I'm going with this girl, Eve. She's in our group," Annalise says carefully. No one ever asked where she went on the weekends, and she never volunteered the information.

"Oh, the smart girl?" Lisa asks. Eve had become a class celebrity after her mock trial, in which she dusted her competition and had the shortest deliberation period for the jury out of all of the members of the class. "She seems nice. But you know you could always ask me or Kim to go with you if you want."

"I know, she just invited me," Annalise says with a bit of a smile. Lisa has moved to her closet to search for a purse or something. She pauses and pulls out a small pocketbook before looking at Annalise, thinking.

"I heard that she's gay," she says, running a hand through her hand. "Is that true?"

"I don't know," Annalise lies. "I mean, we're not all that close." She doesn't know how honest she can be before making Lisa suspicious. Apparently, not honest at all, because as Lisa hands her bag to Annalise, she gives her a small smile.

"Wouldn't matter if she was," she says. The way Annalise looks away is enough to at least confirm that she knows something more than what's she saying. But she lets the matter drop, or she has to anyways because there's a knock at the door.

"That's her," Annalise says, draping Lisa's bag over her shoulder before she grabs her wallet and her keys and stuff them into it.

"Right," Lisa says, adjusting Annalise hair before stepping back. "You really do look great. Have fun." Annalise smiles and steps out of her room, and as she opens the door, she hears Lisa beginning to sing again.

Eve is in the hallway, waiting. Annalise slips out of the room and closes the door behind her, before looking at her and smiling shyly at Eve.

"Hi," she says. It takes Eve a second to answer, she's too busy running down Annalise's body. Over the curves her sides, and her bare legs, then back up to her chest, which she wishes Annalise wouldn't always hide. She realizes what she's thinking before looking away as quickly as she can, hoping that her face doesn't give too much of what she was thinking away.

"Hey," she manages to say, running a hand through her own hair, which falls in loose waves that frame the sharp angles of her face in a very aesthetically pleasing way. "You look...amazing."

Annalise's cheeks flush until they're visibly a deep reddish-purple ironically similar to the color on her lips. She shakes her head slightly, but Eve's smile is a mile wide when she looks back at her. And goddammit she bites her lip. Annalise looks away for a second before speaking up. She coughs, feeling unbelievably flustered.

"You look great too," she says eventually, smiling a bit before flicking her eyes down to look at the tile floor. If she's being honest, Eve more than great. She looks sexy. Annalise doesn't even have a chance to analyze her own thoughts as she drags her eyes back up Eve's body. Everything is perfect: her mile long legs, clad in sheer tights under tight black shorts; her bare midsection; the even tighter white halter top, tied behind her neck in a small bow, her makeup, darker than usual, giving her a seductive, smoky look.

She looks like a dream.

Annalise also unwillingly notices that she doesn't seem to be wearing a bra. When she looks back up at Eve's face, she notices that Eve doesn't even notice her checking her out. Instead, her eyes are trained on Annalise's face, looking a bit wistful.

After she notices Annalise is looking, Eve coughs and looks away, her blush more than apparent. She smiles a bit before meeting her eyes one more time, squeezing her clutch in an attempt to release some of the tension she feels.

"So you ready to go?"

* * *

After crawling through a couple of bars that don't quite reach their expectations, and dragging their feet along the sidewalks of Cambridge, Annalise and Eve make their way to a bar with a makeshift sign that says Calor y Frio in bright red letters. It wasn't in the best part of town, and it hadn't looked too promising on the outside, with dark tinted windows and a rough looking bright green poster taped on the door with nothing but the words dança e bebidas and a picture of a balloon on it. Surprisingly, it had been Annalise who had to convince Eve to step inside with. She was tired of the bland bars they'd tried earlier, all playing the same awful pop songs over and over again until they rang in Annalise's ears long after they left. She wanted something new, music she could dance to. Music she could let go to. So when she'd seen this option, she'd grasped Eve's hand with out of character firmness and said "Come on!" before she'd pressed the door open and they'd stepped inside.

After they step into this bar, it's clear that this it is different from other places they've been tonight. The first thing Annalise and Eve both notice is the dance floor. It's not large by any stretch of the imagination, but it's the center of the building. The people on it are loud and lively, a sea of grins and brightly colored clothing. The walls are full of colorful posters advertising events, and the home to a large Brazilian flag, while the ceiling is high and full of large strings of orange and yellow lights that emit a dim but colorful blanket over the scene before them. The music playing is loud, and in either Spanish or Portuguese, but it doesn't really matter. Not to Annalise. It's different, and it makes her excited; like a million butterflies are all fighting inside of her stomach.

She and Eve make their way to the bar first. They've already had a couple of drinks, but earlier in the night and the buzz had begun to wear off, so now they order more. Annalise is a fan of vodka, usually mixed with juice, but Eve orders a couple of rounds of shots for them and pays before she can even speak up. The alcohol burns going down Annalise's throat, but as it settles in her stomach, it feels warm and that feeling spreads throughout her as they drink. After a few minutes and her third shot, she's ready to dance. Eve seems to be feeling the effects of the drinks too; her cheeks are flushed and when she stands up and grabs Annalise's hand, she giggles nervously before pulling her out of her seat wordlessly. She looks around and stuffs her clutch under a couch cushion that she can dance with her hands free. Then, she turns to Annalise, gives her a little half smile, and tugs her to the dance floor.

Eve doesn't stop until they're nearly in the middle of the floor. It's packed, and slightly warm, but as soon as Eve starts moving her body against Annalise's nothing else matter. The lights fade and the music seems to quiet. This is new to Annalise. The way Eve flashes her grins holds her hands lightly, body pressed against her, movements barely constrained by the crowd surrounding them. Annalise has never been the kind of person to do things like this. She'd been to clubs, and drank, of course, partied until she'd passed out, but never so personally. She'd never been able to feel someone's breath against her cheek or moved her body back against theirs so that they felt like they fit together. She'd never been able to, not with the triggers and the panic attacks. But being with Eve is different. She makes the bad go away, sends the nightmares to the depths of Annalise's mind where they can't hurt her anymore. She saves her. Annalise like it. She likes getting to be close like this. It's impossible to feel alone when they're close like this.

And so, as Eve's body rocks back and forth, Annalise moves with her - forth and back, back and forth. She's untouchable. They're untouchable. Invincible. She laughs, and Eve grins, tightening her grip on the hand she's still holding.

Annalise can hear the music again, pounding in her eardrums. The tune comes through loud and clear, just like the beat of her heart, matching the pace of Eve's. Annalise laughs again, unable to stop herself. She tucks her face in the crook of Eve's neck, an impossibly wide grin plastered across her face.

She wishes she could feel like this every night.

* * *

Hours later, after the next day has just started, they step outside of the bar. Annalise takes large breaths, welcoming the cool outdoor air into her lungs. Her feet hurt and she's tired, but unable to quit smiling. Eve, clutching her bag and leaning against Annalise in smiling in a similar fashion. In between dances, they'd gone to the bar a few times and it had become apparent that Eve was a bit of a lightweight. She's a bubbly drunk it seems, full of laughter and even more touchy-feely than she usually is. Annalise is a little fuzzy but more aware than Eve at least and she decides that the subway is the best way to get home. On their ride to Eve's apartment on the green line, she keeps her hand in Annalise's and her head on her shoulder, humming lightly. She talks softly, letting Annalise know that she looks nice and that she thinks her shoes are really nice. Then later, the first thing that comes out of her mouth after they get into her apartment is:

"God, I like you."

She's leaning against her door, watching Annalise. Her pupils are dilated, but she looks relatively alert, although her words are slurred a bit.

"I like you so much. Did you know that? I mean, I guess I make it kind of obvious, but just in case you didn't know, I want you to know. I like you so so much."

Annalise chuckles as she takes her purse off, followed by her shoes, which evoke a sigh of relief when they come off. Annalise sits down on the couch and wiggles her toes before answering.

"Thank you," she says, smiling softly. Eve comes and sits down next to her. It takes her a couple of tries, but she gets her boots off, creating a run in her tights as she does. The last event earns a fuck and a slight sigh from Eve as she sets the boots side by side at the foot of the couch. She looks up after this, though, looking at Annalise as she reaches over and touches her thigh lightly. Annalise inhales.

"Do you like me?" Eve asks. She pauses, and chuckles after she says it. "It sounds so silly, and it's a dumb thing to ask, but I want you to. And I think you do sometimes, but I can't tell. You know I like you. So do you like me?"

Annalise looks at her. She looks confused, nervous. So different from how she usually was. Annalise purses her lips together and decides that she might as well tell the truth.

"Yes," she says. "I like you very much."

Eve begins to smile. Eventually, it turns into a giggle, and that makes Annalise laugh too. The sounds blend until they're both laughing together. At each other, at their good fortune. It's rare to find someone that likes you as much as you like them. At least, that's the thought that occurs to Eve in her jumbled mind as she lays her head back on Annalise's shoulder. She feels so lucky to be here, right now.

Eventually, the laughter fades into grins that hang off of both of their faces like christmas ornaments. Annalise looks down at Eve (which isn't something she can do often) and her head resting on her own shoulder. She pauses before she smooths down her head, and with the aid of the liquid courage running through her veins, she leans down and presses a soft kiss to the top of her head.

Eve looks up at this. Her lips are parted slightly and she's watching Annalise's face. She wants to kiss her. Annalise wants to kiss her. It's a strong feeling, but she's already used all of her courage tonight. So instead of pressing her lips against Eve's like she so badly wants to, she pulls back slightly.

"Did you want to get ready for bed?"

Eve nods in response, disappointment written all over her face. Annalise stands up, then helps her up and together they head to Eve's room. Eve steps carefully over to her dresser and picks out a long flannel nightshirt for herself, and a large sweatshirt that she hands to Annalise. Annalise gets ready to leave the room, but Eve steps closer and turns her back to her.

"Untie this for me?" she asks, her voice sweet. Annalise does so, pulling at the bow on Eve's halter top until it loosens and material falls away from Eve's chest. Annalise should leave now, but she doesn't. Instead, she stays and watches as Eve unbuttons her shorts and lets them fall to the ground, then slips out of her tights until all that's left on her person is a black pair of boy shorts. Annalise inhales softly; she might as well be frozen to the ground. Eve slips the flannel on like a jacket before turning to face Annalise. She's still awfully exposed, and Annalise's eyes immediately go to the ground.

"Who's checking who out now?" Eve murmurs. She buttons the top button of the flannel before pausing. She bites her lip. Sober, she wouldn't have pushed Annalise. But like this, mind blurred by drinks, feeling amplified, she didn't know how to stop herself. So slowly, not even bothering to button the rest of the flannel, she steps in just a bit closer to Annalise, and cups her cheeks with both of her hands.

"Annalise?"

Annalise looks up now, not having much of a choice. She looks right up into Eve's deep brown eyes, which are just insisting that she can trust her. And for a second things feel right. Things feel good, really good. But then something in Annalise's brain connects, or maybe snaps (she can't tell) and everything gets turned upside down and feels wrong. Maybe it's the smell of alcohol or Eve's proximity, she doesn't know, but a wave of pain rushes through her and she feels the urge to pull away.

No. She thinks to herself, beginning to slowly panic as Eve strokes her cheek, and she flinches. No, no, no, not right now. Her brain doesn't agree with her heart, though, and suddenly she's Anna Mae, in her bed, her uncle sitting at the other end, his breath smelling of cheap beer, his hairy hands crawling towards her. Eve leans into kiss her, but she sees him and she pulls back so hard she leaves Eve's grasp completely.

"Stop!" she exclaims, her voice desperate, barely above a whisper. Eve doesn't get it, though. Her judgment is impaired and she thinks Annalise is just afraid. Because she thinks she's straight and doesn't want to kiss another girl.

"Annalise, it's okay," she says softly, reaching out for her hand. But it's still him. Talking to her in those slimy words and promising it would be okay when it wasn't. It hadn't been okay, and it wouldn't be now.

"No," she says, her eyes full of fear. Her voice raises and she snatches her hand away, and shakes her head. "No, it's not." She blinks. She sees Eve. She looks concerned, confused, and is shaking her head slightly as well. Annalise takes a large gulp of air, but she's on edge, her body quivering. The hairs on her arms are standing up.

"I have to go to the bathroom," she says, backing up. "I'll be right back." She tries her hardest to level her voice, and walk out normally, but after she shuts herself in Eve's bathroom, she covers her face and lets out a frustrated sob, placing her back against the wall and sliding down until she sits with a dull thump. The sweatshirt Eve handed her is still in her hand, but she's screaming into it, muffling her voice, but she's screaming. She hates this. Hates the flashbacks, hates what happened, hates herself. Because she can't be normal and move on. Because she can't be touched by someone without having an insane reaction. She's a freak, wounded by trauma but she can't get better. Things had begun to get better. She'd stopped having the flashbacks, but here they were again. One step forward, two steps back. She learned about things like this in school, but no matter what she studies she can't fix herself. Can't stop the memories, can't function as a normal person. And she hates herself for it. She feels utterly useless and utterly helpless. So she screams into the bundled sweatshirt in her arms and keeps going until her throat feels raw and her cheeks are soaked with tears. And then she starts to cry, but she stops herself. As best she can at least.

"Stop," she murmurs to herself, eyebrows knit together, face. "You stop it." She refuses to fall apart right now. She can't just completely give up, she'd never stand up off of Eve's colorfully tiled bathroom floor.

Eventually, she's able to stand. She strips down to her underwear and slips the sweatshirt on. It's stained at the base with mascara, but it's navy and the black smudges aren't too noticeable. She scrubs her face cleans and uses an extra toothbrush from under the sink before sighing and looking at herself in the mirror. Her eyes are red, and puffy underneath. She sniffs. Eventually, she has to look away. She's so broken, she doesn't even know if she's worth trying to save.

* * *

When she gets back to Eve's room, she finds her already asleep. When she checks the clock later, she'll see that she'd been in that bathroom for nearly an hour. She doesn't want to bother Eve, so she hunts through the apartment and finds a blanket in a closet before taking it to the couch. She sets her folded clothes on the coffee table before wrapping up in the blanket and sinking into the couch.

As her eyes flutter closed, she hopes that maybe she'll be able to find solace in sleep.


	6. Red Lipstick and Liquor

_**AN: I'm so sorry this chapter is so very late. I just went on break for school, and I didn't have time until now to post it. And then I was writing the first Christmas chapter for this story and I was almost done before I realized that the event in this chapter would have to take place first because of the timeline and my reference in IEL. So I abandoned that other chapter and started writing this one and it's kind of short but I hope you all love it. Hopefully, the next chapter won't take so long x**_

Annalise's dorm reeked of stale coffee, and her laundry was piled high enough to have earned the title "Mount McFunk" from Lisa. Any clean clothes she had were wrinkled past saving and her eyes were perpetually crowded by dark bags.

Exam week was coming.

The past week, neither she, nor any of her friends, had done anything except study, eat, and sleep when their schedules allowed for it. And now it was Sunday night, and she was sprawled out on her bed, her Torts textbook open to some random page, her eyes scanning over the same sentence, over, and over, and over while managing to comprehend nothing. Shockingly, after reading over the same material enough times, her brain had turned into something like mush.

Annalise glances at the clock. It's just after 10. She was alone in the dorm room. Lisa had gone out with a group of students for a crash study course, and they hadn't gotten back yet. Annalise had of course been invited, but she had never been one for group work. She worked best individually, maybe with a partner, but definitely not in a group setting. The students Lisa had gone out with hadn't been Annalise's type of friends anyways. They were the other top of the class students, all the stereotypically Harvard types Eve had mentioned distastefully. As if she couldn't fit in with them. She was probably there with them right now, and that was another one of the reasons Annalise had graciously declined Lisa's invitation. She didn't know if she could see Eve.

It's not like Eve had done anything wrong really. It was just that after that night dancing at that bar, Annalise had developed a fear of getting closer to her. Being around Eve made her slip and lose control of the emotions she so carefully monitored. She didn't even know for sure if Eve even remembered the event – the morning after, she'd acted normal and been sweet and nice and perfect because ugh that's who she was. Perfect. And Annalise was a mess. They did not fit together.

To get her point across, Annalise was slowly withdrawing herself from Eve. They hadn't spent the last few weekends together or talked much in class. When Eve called, Annalise didn't always answer. She'd cut back on going to the gym, at least when she knew that Eve would be there.

It wasn't good. Annalise knew that. It wasn't right to just pull away and not tell her what was wrong, but she didn't know what to say. Picking the right words in a courtroom was one thing, but telling someone you were too messed up to have a healthy relationship because you'd never been touched without malice was more than hard. It was so different, because instead of talking about a client, Annalise was talking about herself. Or at least, the old version of herself – Anna Mae. Poor Anna Mae. Too brown, not pretty enough, lips too big, hair too nappy. Not beautiful and light, like the people on TV or in her class at school. No neat bow tying back her dress. Never good enough. She belonged in a hand me down box right next an over-stretched sweater and a pair of scuffed shoes. Yeah, Annalise felt bad for her, but she wasn't the one that was going to be pulling her out of that box. No, she could stay right where she was, forever if she had to.

Dammit, she swears this is the 70th time she's read this line. She needs a break. The phone rings. Annalise sighs with relief and runs a hand through her hair, wincing a bit at the tenderness of the newly redone perimeter of her hair. Unfortunately, they'd been done by one of Lisa's friends from New York who talks too fast and probably drinks too much. They looked alright, were too tight, and irritated her scalp. She knows that she has to find the time to get her hair done over completely eventually, but it hasn't been her priority.

She hops up and gets the phone from its place in the living room before answering. She holds her breath for a second, which is her custom because she can never tell if it's her mother on the phone or not.

"Hello?" the other person asks. Annalise exhales, but her stomach has begun fluttering. It's not her mother.

It's Eve.

"Hello? Annalise?" she asks, her voice sounding a bit confused.

"Hey, Eve?" Annalise responds, sinking into their overstuffed couch.

"Of course," Eve says. Her light voice has sent Annalise's nerves into overdrive. It feels like she holding a small butterfly farm in her stomach. "Are you still studying?"

"Of course," Annalise answers, her tone mirroring Eve's. She knows that if they were together, she'd be able to see Eve smiling. That thought doesn't calm her down at all. "Are you?"

"I'm trying, I guess," Eve answers half-heartedly. "I needed a break, and I was thinking of you, so I called."

She was thinking of Annalise. This is why Annalise couldn't be around her. There was no chance of being just friends when Eve complimented her, and teased her, and made her smile. She was absolutely amazing, and lively. Everything Annalise wanted to be. Everything Annalise couldn't be. She was flustered. Eve had flustered her, and Annalise was sure she had done it on purpose. She's trapped her, and now Annalise has to play back.

"You were thinking about me?" She asks. Eve chuckles and 'mhm's on the other end. "What were you thinking?"

"I just feel like I haven't seen you in awhile, you know?" Eve says carefully. "I just um, miss you I guess.?"

Dammit, she sounds bashful almost. Nervous. Honest. It shakes Annalise a bit, and she's losing whatever slight hold she had on her emotions.

"You missed me?" she repeats, beginning to sound like a broken record. Eve laughs, and it's a gorgeous sound. "You sure about that?"

"That's what I said, isn't it?" she pauses. "I know you're studying, but…I had an idea."

"Yeah?" Annalise asks, intrigued. "And what's that idea?"

"Okay, so, there's this undergraduate house party going on off-campus that I heard about…" Eve starts, but Annalise quickly interject

"Wait, a house party? Undergrad? How did you hear about it?"

"At the library, there were these kids- it's not important. Anyways, we'd be the only law students there, and it could be fun."

"You're considering going?" Annalise asks incredulously. "Really? We have exams in the morning."

"Yeah, you think?" Eve says, her voice sarcastic, but excited. "I guess you can tell how stressed I am. It could be fun. We could just go for a little while, and let loose, get back before 12, it'll be great."

"You're insane," Annalise says, although she's beginning to smile. "I haven't been to a house party since I was 18."

"You can't tell me you don't dance. I saw you the last time we went out." This statement from Eve makes Annalise remember why she's been avoiding her. How she'd freaked out. It also made her remember what it felt like to have Eve's body against hers. How it felt to yell over the music until her voice was hoarse. How it felt to hear Eve say she liked her 'so, so much'. Because of this, she herself answer:

"Fine, let's do it." Eve cheers on the other end. Annalise can hear her moving on her end of the line.

"Yes, great!" Eve exclaims. There's more rustling, a bump. "I'll come pick you up as soon as I get dressed. Wear something hot." Annalise starts to speak up, but there's a click and Eve is gone.

Annalise sets the phone down and takes a large breath. She's second-guessing herself now like she usually does. Did she make the right decision? Could she take seeing Eve again? And did she even have anything wear? She gets up and heads to her room. When she gets in there, she starts rummaging through her closet before giving up and heading into Lisa's room. When she gets there, she turns and looks at the clock. It's a little after 10:30 now. They could be back home by 12, 12:30. Right?

* * *

Wrong. Because by the time Eve gets Annalise, it's 11. She'd parked on the street, and then they'd decided to take the subway into Boston, where the party is. When they walked in the front door, which was already open, it was nearly 12 already. On the upside, that meant the party was in full swing. The house was full, and the music was jumping. The air smelled like alcohol, which provided a cause for the movement of bodies in the center of living room they'd stepped into. They leave their coats on a coat hook near the door before looking around.

"Want a drink?" Eve asked, smiling to combat the uneasy look on Annalise's face. Annalise had answered by nodding head slightly, and to her surprise, Eve grasped her hand and pulls her through the crowd. When they stepped into the kitchen, the crowd was just as thick and they had to push their way over to the counter, crowded with topless bottles surrounding a punch bowl containing a strong smelling liquid.

"And I thought I'd graduated from drinking from open bottles," Annalise had said, picking up a bottle of vodka and taking a whiff.

"I'm sure it's safe," Eve answered while grabbing a solo cup and adding a generous amount of punch.

Annalise sure hoped it was safe because they had drank. And drank and drank. She hadn't intended to drink so much when she walked in. But as she watched Eve, drinking from that red cup with her red tinted lips and nodding her head to the beat, body moving slightly under her nude colored slip dress and she'd decided that she wanted to have a good time. So she drank, and Eve followed. She didn't handle alcohol as well as Annalise, and she didn't seem nearly as nervous as she was either. So after they drank, they headed to the living room and danced. That's where they were now, and where they had been for the last hour or so. Dancing is just as fun as Annalise remembered it to be, and even better now that she's decided not to worry about limiting her drink intake. It was fine, right? They just had to get on the subway home, no big deal. And not flinching every time Eve touches her. Her senses are dull, and that means her memory is locked away and she can focus on the now. They aren't dancing close like they had before, but widely. Dancing mindlessly, using all their energy. Eve has pretty good rhythm, and Annalise isn't half bad herself. Fear erased by alcohol, she turns her back to Eve and dances against her, a smile on her face. Eve seems surprised because her body freezes, but then she wraps her arms around Annalise's bare waist - negative space between Lisa's borrowed leather mini skirt and cropped turtleneck. Annalise chuckles softly and moves with Eve, closing her eyes. When she leans her body back Eve brushes her lips against Annalise's ear, taking a breath. The lighting in the room is dim, and it's crowded, so no one notices Annalise shiver slightly. She slides her hands over Eve's and intertwines their fingers. But then, she freezes as she feels Eve press a light kiss to the top of her ear. Eve pauses after that and slowly removes her hands from Annalise's waist. Annalise turns around to face Eve, who is, of course, biting on her lip. She takes a breath before running a hand through Annalise's hand, playing with the end of her braid starts to raise her other hand to Annalise's face, but Annalise panics and speaks up.

"You wanna get out of here?" she asks, not even thinking about the questions connotation. Eve's eyes widen, but she nods so hard that her brown curls bob.

"Yeah, okay," she answers, beginning to smile again, her teeth still holding onto her bottom lip. She puts one of her hands back into Annalise's and together, they head back to the front door. Eve drops Annalise's hand as they put on their coats, but after that, she picks it back up again and they stumble out their door together and into the crisp December air. Their footsteps are uneven and a bit wobbly as they make their way down the sidewalk and down into the subway substance. Eve is smiling the whole time, but as they sit down, Annalise notices the parallels between this and last time. Her thoughts aren't as clear, though, and she doesn't know what to do with her observation. All she can think about on as they ride on the subway home is Eve's hand on her tight-clad thigh and how she can't remember anyone running their thumb over her skin so gently. Or anyone looking at her the way Eve does, eyes sparkling. And the more she thinks about those things, The more she thinks about Eve, the more she thinks she likes her. She's also beginning to glance at her lips, still lightly stained red, although the color is less vibrant than it was when the night started. She hasn't kissed Eve in all this time, although she thinks about it almost every time they're together. She's scared to. She doesn't want to be scared anymore, though.

They get off near Eve's building since it's closer. When they get to the apartment, it takes her a few tries to open the door, but she gets it eventually, and they step inside. It's decorated inside, strings of Christmas lights hanging from the windows, and a small tree in the corner. Eve is on cloud nine it seems like, smile wide. She closes the door and locks it before turning to Annalise and stepping in. Annalise giggles nervously. Eve giggles back before biting her lip again.

"Um, let me help you with that," she says softly, lowering her eyes a bit as she helps Annalise take off her coat. She places it on the back of her chair, along with her own. When she looks back over to Annalise, Annalise is watching her carefully, playing with her hands nervously. Eve raises her eyes up again and meets Annalise's, stepping in to fill the gap between them.

"What are you thinking about?" Eve asks, watching Annalise's calculated eyes and parted lips. Something's on her mind, Eve knows it.

"You," Annalise answers, completely candid thanks to all of the vodka and cokes she'd had. "Just about you. How you make me feel. And how you're beautiful."

Eve blushes when Annalise says this, raising a hand to her face and tucking back a tendril of her hair.

"Do you still like me?" Eve asks. "Because we haven't talked and I got scared that I did something wrong, I mean, I didn't know..."

Scared. She'd been scared. Annalise is surprised to hear this because it doesn't seem like Eve's the type to get scared. She doesn't have much of a reason to, at least not when it came to people liking her. She was gorgeous, with those golden brown eyes and that cute nose that got red when she was cold. People noticed her, and they liked her. And anyone would be lucky to have her.

Annalise has gotten a little sidetracked, and worry overcomes the features Annalise is so intensely appreciating. She looks back at Eve's watery eyes, and her lips now pressed together in a hard, flat, line. Annalise had been worried this whole time about being afraid, but she hadn't ever imagined that she could scare someone else.

"I like you," Annalise answers firmly, nodding slightly as she looks back up at Eve. "I think I might like you more than I've ever liked anyone in my entire life." Eve's nervousness leaves her body in a slight chuckle and she wipes at her eyes.

"God, you scared me," she says, her voice quiet, happy. When she looks back at Annalise, she's smiling again.. "I'm glad you like me. I'm beginning to more than like you." She pauses here, looking down bashfully, her cheeks pinkish.

"I want to kiss you," Annalise blurts. Eve's head snaps back up, her eyebrows knit together. "Like all, the time." She laughs, but it's not really funny.

"Why don't you?" is Eve's answers. Her eyes are focused on Annalise, who is still playing with her fingers. Twisting her watch around her wrist. She's drunk, but she has more clarity than usual.

"I get too scared."

Eve steps in a bit more. There's no space at all between them now. She slips one of her hands into Annalise's carefully, making her look up from her hands.

"There's no reason to be scared," she says softly. Annalise doesn't answer, so after a minute, she continues. "Do you want to kiss me right now?

"Yes," Annalise answers before her brain has a chance to catch up with her heart. Eve is quiet. She's waiting for her. And Annalise doesn't quite piece it together right then, but she's still afraid too. She's afraid scaring Annalise off. So instead, she just squeezes Annalise's hand. Annalise keeps talking. "And I wanted to kiss you on the subway. I was looking at you and you just looked so happy. I want to be as happy as you looked, and sometimes when I'm with you, I feel that. I feel like smiling all the time, and I don't know how to stop, but it doesn't matter because I don't want to stop. And I wanted to grab you and kiss you and tell you that you made me happy, but I couldn't.

"And then I wanted to kiss you at the party too. When you kissed my ear, I almost melted. I wanted to turn around and crash my lips against yours because you just have this way of making me feel like..."

Annalise has to catch her breath before she can finish, because Eve has leaned in and

kissed the tip of her ear in the exact same way she had before. It makes Annalise feel the same as it did before too. As she lets her eyes flutter shut, she can feel her heart beating; _ba dum, ba dum,_ like it'll just beat right through her chest. Eve doesn't pull away either. She kisses down Annalise's ear, choosing to do what she feels is right. Her lips are soft, and her kisses feather light. She trails her mouth down Annalise's ear, to her neck, then down that as well before she kisses over her cheek, and very gently, the corner of her mouth. Annalise is shaking. She opens her eyes as Eve stops, and finds her watching her carefully, trying to gauge how much is too much. She relaxes her eyelids and leans in just a bit, brushing her nose against Annalise's gently, once, twice. Her lips are hovering over Annalise's, less than half an inch away. It would be so easy to kiss her. So easy to just lean up and finally kiss her.

But she's afraid. And her brain has finally caught up to the rest of the body, and she starts to panic. Her body heats up awfully quickly and her heart rate quickens and she has to pull away before she starts to fall deeper into those memories she so badly tried to hide.

"I can't," she whispers, shaking her head. She pulls back slightly and so does Eve. She's confused, but Annalise doesn't know how to explain. "It's not you. It's not that you're a girl, I just can't. It's something with me and I just-"

"Can't," Eve answers. She nods slowly. She's disappointed, and her cheeks are pink with embarrassment, but she lets it go, along with Annalise's hand. "I understand."

"Maybe another time," Annalise says quietly. Eve folds her arms and nods, looking down at the carpet. "When we're sober."

"Yeah," Eve answers, looking back up, a disappointed smile on her face. "How about we just go to bed?"

"Sure," Annalise says, nodding. Eve leads her back to the bedroom, then immediately heads to her dresser and finds a t-shirt and pajama bottoms for them both before handing them to Annalise.

"Socks?" she asks quietly, Annalise shakes her head no. She's beginning to develop a headache. Eve closes the drawer before turning around. She can't even look Annalise in the eye. "I'm going to sleep on the couch."

"Don't," Annalise says quickly. Eve raises her eyebrows a bit. "Can you stay. Please? Just for a minute." Eve hesitates for a second, but Annalise looks so hopeful and so nervous that eventually she goes ahead and nods.

"Sure," she says. Annalise smiles gratefully and then turns her back to Eve to get changed. Her movements still aren't coordinated, and everything takes a few tries. She takes off her tights first, then her skirt, and tugs on the pajama bottoms before switching her turtleneck out for the loose t-shirt she'd been given. Her last step is to remove her bra and pull it off through her sleeve with a relieved sigh, letting it fall onto the floor on top of the pile she'd made. She's beginning to get awfully tired now. When she turns, Eve is tying the ribbon on the waist of her bottoms to fit her thin waist. When she finishes, she looks at Annalise and offers her a small smile before heading to the bed. She pulls the covers back and climbs in, followed by Annalise.

After she's already laid her head on the pillow closest to her, Annalise realizes that she hadn't brushed her teeth, She also realized that she didn't really care. Almost immediately, she shuts her eyes and falls asleep. It's nearly 4 in the morning.

* * *

Annalise wakes up to Eve shaking her leg.

"C'mon, Annalise, if you want to shower, you've got to get in now," she's saying. "C'mon, get up." She taps Annalise's thigh one final time before turning to her mirror. When Annalise manages to open her eyes, she sees Eve, already fully dressed, pinning her hair back into a ponytail. Her head is pounding.

"What time is it?" she asks slowly, rubbing her eyes.

"8:05," Eve answers. "I tried to wake you up before I got ready, but you would not budge. Last night was also very cold for me. Anyone ever tell you that you hog the sheets?" Annalise takes a second, yawning and pushing her braids out of her face before she sits up.

"My _head_ ," she groans, holding it with both hands. She swears her forehead is throbbing. "What the hell did we do last night?" Eve chuckles. She's putting on lipstick now.

"Beats me," she says. "But you've got to get up. The exam starts at 8:30 and you know they'll shut the door on us if we're late. I'll get you an aspirin."

"Yeah," Annalise says. The exam. Fuck. She didn't even feel like standing up, much less taking an exam. Eve glances at her reflection and sighs softly, although she's smiling a bit as she turns and hold her hand out to Annalise.

"C'mon, you have to get up," she says, taking Annalise hand and pulling her up out of bed. She sniffs before raising a brow. "You smell like vodka. Go shower, I'll find clothes for you to wear."

Annalise does as she's told with no argument. She can smell herself. When she gets into the bathroom, she grabs a washrag and turns the shower on to cold in an effort to try and wake herself up a bit, and hops in, immediately beginning to shiver. The water definitely makes her alert if nothing else. But for the life of her, she cannot remember the consecutive events of last night. When she gets out of the bathroom, after showering, brushing her teeth, and applying lotion, she can only remember red solo cups and lipstick. And dancing. There was dancing.

She steps back in Eve's room to find that she's not there. There's a skirt and sweater waiting for her, along with a pair of long black socks. When Annalise puts everything on, she looks like a much shorter version of Eve. She finds an eyebrow pencil and lipstick in Eve's bathroom and helps herself after calling to Eve to ask to borrow the two. Then she picks up Lisa's clothes, which Eve had folded and stepped out of Eve's room. Eve is in the kitchen. She hands Annalise a strawberry Pop-Tart and her coat before pushing her out of the door.

They leave around 8:20 and get to campus at 8:28. Eve parks on the street and they rush into the building as quickly as they can. When Annalise sinks into her chair, huffing from running, Lisa gives her a look, but she's too busy trying to catch her breath to explain. And then the doors shutting and there's no talking because there's a thick packet sitting on her desk that's the exam she'd been dreading. Sighing, Annalise picks up her pencil and writes her name in.

After turning in her exam, Annalise waited outside. Surprisingly, she hadn't been one of the last to finish. Soon after she's done, Eve steps out. She sits next to Annalise on the bench she's waiting on.

"It's cold out here," Eve announces. Annalise smiles a bit.

"Yeah. I wanted my friends to know where I was, though. Lisa's going to have questions." Eve chuckles.

"Lisa? I have questions." Annalise looks at her smile. White teeth framed by red-tinted lips. Red lips. Lipstick. Eve's lips. She frowns before speaking up.

"We didn't kiss or anything last night, did we?" Eve's chuckle turns into a laugh before she shakes her head.

"No, I don't remember much, but I think I would remember that," she says.

"Yeah?" Annalise asks. Eve nods.

"Well, I've been waiting forever to kiss you. I don't think I'd forget something I'd been aiming to get all these months." Annalise's cheeks darken, and Eve smiles. "Want to get a coffee or something?"

Annalise hesitates.

"You still owe me an aspirin," she says. Eve's grin widens.

"Okay, well then, do you want to get a coffee, and an aspirin?"

"My friends-" Annalise starts, shaking her head.

"They're not going anywhere," Eve says. She tilts her head in such a cute way that Annalise has to let her smile widen. She pauses, but then she nods.

"Yeah, okay."


	7. Snow and Snickerdoodle

**_AN: Hey guys, this is the first winter break chapter. I've been planning this section of writing since I started this story, and so I really hope you like where I take it. This is another filler kind of chapter, but I hope you enjoy it anyways._**

The last day of school before winter break is the first time Annalise sees snow in person instead of just in some snow globe or on a Christmas special. Of course, she had lived in the South for 24 of her 25 years of life, and the temperature seldom dropped below fifty, and so the most precipitation they got at any given time was rain. Georgia had its benefits, but the winter weather definitely was not one of them. And so now, as she tries to finish packing to go home, she finds herself staring outside of the window at the lightly falling white flurries outside. To her, snow is gorgeous.

There's a slight knock at the door before Lisa pokes her head into Annalise's room.

"Hey," she says. "I'm getting ready to head out." Annalise smiles a bit and places one last pair of socks into her suitcase before zipping it shut.

"You can come in," she says with a shrug. Lisa steps in and plops onto Annalise's unmade bed, a package in her hand. She has a large grin on her face as she holds out the wrapped present she's holding to Annalise.

"This is for you," she says, looking a bit flustered, which is strangely out of character. "I hope you like it." Annalise's smile widens as she takes the gift and sets it on her dresser before she steps over to her closet shuffles through its contents before finding the package she was looking for. When she turns around, she hands Lisa the gift she'd bought for her. Annalise didn't have money to spare, but she'd made sure to set aside the money to buy gifts for her friends and her family, even if it meant cutting her budget in other places.

"And this is for you," she says, turning back to her suitcase and picking it up before setting it down on the ground. She sits next to Lisa and bumps her shoulder, giggling a bit. Lisa bumps her back.

"Thank you," Lisa says, chuckling softly. She sets her gift down next to her, but she's looking at Annalise. Something's on her mind. Luckily, she's not the type to hesitate before speaking.

"You're going home right?"

"Of course, I am. They won't let me stay here," Annalise says, a good-natured grin still on her face, even though the thought of heading home brings on a wave of nausea. She raises one of her eyebrows a bit. "Why?"

"Did you ever talk to your mom?" Lisa asks. Annalise smile drops and she presses her lips together in reply. "Annalise, you know she's been calling here since the first week of school."

Annalise sighs slightly, seemingly suddenly interested in her hands. Lisa is watching her carefully. Kim might have been the one who cooked, but funnily enough, Lisa is the one who reminds her of a mother more often. She's protective, and if something's wrong, she'll always ask to help. What she's saying is true. Annalise's mother had been calling, but Annalise hasn't answered not once. It wasn't like she was angry or anything, though. It's just that her mother was part of Georgia, and Georgia reminded her of everything she disliked about herself. She'd done her best to leave every hand-me-down and clothing patch back in their little house. She'd left for a reason. And to be honest, she didn't want to go back, not even now; it was just her only option.

"I'm gonna call her, okay?" Annalise says eventually, running a hand through hair, meeting Lisa's eyes. "Really."

"Promise?" Lisa asks, raising an eyebrow. Annalise rolls her eyes, but eventually gives in.

"I promise," she says grudgingly. Lisa smiles again.

"Good."

She pauses for a second before she speaks up again.

"She probably just misses you, you know?"

Annalise doesn't buy that, but she nods anyway. No sense in emptying out her feelings now. Nothing was going to change the fact that she had to face her Mama sooner or later.

"Yeah, maybe."

Lisa smiles and gives Annalise a bit of a hug.

"Alright, lemme go ahead and get out of here 'fore I miss my train or something stupid," she says, getting up. Annalise stands up after her and smiles a bit.

"Thanks for the gift," she says as they walk out of her room. Lisa grabs her coat and buttons it up before grabbing her bag.

"No problem," she says, picking up her keys. "Don't open it until Christmas, alright?" Annalise chuckles.

"Yeah, alright."

Lisa is ready now, standing at the door. She turns to Annalise, brushing back a lock of her long hair out of her fair face.

"I'll see you in January," she says, opening the door. "Don't forget to call your mom."

"Bye," Annalise says with a slight smile as she steps out. The door clicks behind her, and she hears Lisa's footsteps fading as she walks away. And then she's alone.

She sighs and raises her arms above her head, stretching. Her joints pop in a pleasing way, but the action reminds her of something else.

" _You aren't one of those people that always crack their knuckles and things? Because that would ruin this,"_ Eve had asked after they'd left the gym for the first time. Annalise had laughed and assured her that she wasn't. At the time, she'd wondered what _this_ was, but more importantly, she hadn't wanted to do anything to jeopardize it. And now, she was beginning to see what they had. After they had coffee after their first exam, she'd left and went to her apartment to sit and think, and to try to sort out the feelings that were fluttering around inside of her.

She felt different around Eve, she knew that. She had thought about what it would be like to date her, and she'd never known what it felt like to want to date someone, or to even want to be with them every day. That thought scared her, though. It was new, and Annalise didn't always like new. Eve was new. Annalise had never met anyone like her before. She was honest and sweet, and she smiled a lot. She liked to touch Annalise and compliment her. Annalise wasn't used to receiving a lot of compliments or even being sure she was getting the truth from people. But Eve gave her all of that, along with butterflies. That feeling was what scared Annalise.

She might be falling for Eve.

She hadn't ever fallen for anyone before, though, why now?

She told herself to slow down. They'd had fun at that party they'd gone to, at least from what Annalise remembered. But she'd convinced herself that the little sparks she got when Eve touch her didn't mean anything. That she just thought she liked Eve because she was different and nice. That they wouldn't work - she was too messed up and Eve was virtually flawless. That her feelings would fade and it would just be best if they stayed friends. But there were times when her resolve broke and she let herself remember how it felt to dance with Eve. And how it felt to laugh with her over coffee. And the way she felt her heart swell when she stood in front of Annalise, eyes sparkling, and told her that she liked her " _so, so much"._

Last week Annalise had allowed her resolve to break for just a moment while she was Christmas shopping. She'd seen something that she thought was perfect for Eve, and she'd bought it even though she'd spent all of her free time in the past week hiding so she wouldn't have to face Eve and start falling for her even more. She'd bought it just because it felt right; like being with Eve felt right.

That present was currently in her closet with the rest of the carefully chosen gifts she bought, sitting right on top, wrapped and all. She didn't even know if she'd give it to Eve.

As she sits down on her bed, she sighs. She wonders if maybe she should have tried harder. Let herself be uncomfortable. Eve seemed to like her enough. But then she remembers the way it felt to panic, and to have a flashback and not to be able to pull herself out. The way it felt not to be in control. Sometimes things were good, and she could convince herself that any anxiety she had wasn't as bad as she was making it out to be. She could say she was making her problems up as long as they weren't bothering her right then. But when they were bothering her - oh, that was a different story.

She shivers. She needs to stop thinking about Eve. That's over. They're over. Maybe they could be friends, but any 'this' they'd possessed had dried up like a dream deferred - a raisin in the sun. Annalise was just waiting for it to explode.

As she begins to straighten out the sheets on her bed, she tries to straighten out the thoughts of her mind. By the time she sets her pillow on her now neatly made the bed, she's decided to go ahead and call her mama.

She takes her time preparing, though. She changes into pajamas and ties up her hair, before she pulls the phone into her room and sits down, her legs folded underneath her 'indian style'. After she punches in the number, the phone rings once, twice -

"Hello?" comes a deep-ish male voice on the other end.

"Ray?" Annalise says, surprised. The voice coughs.

"Mae?" her baby brother answers, his voice excited. "Oh shit, Mae is that you? Where the fuck you been Mae? Mama been calling and calling, you don't know how to pick up a phone or nothing though..."

 _Watch that mouth!_ comes somewhere in the background. Annalise has begun to smile. Raymond is the youngest in the family, going to be 17 in June, and the only boy. He was always smiling, and he knew how to make all of his sisters and even his mother smile too.

"It's Mae on the phone Mama," he yells. "You hear that? Mae!" Annalise wishes she were there so she could pop him right on the back of the neck. Her smile falters.

"RAY," she reprimands. "I swear to God if you don't shut that big, flapping mouth, as soon as I get down there imma -"

"Mama wanna talk to you," is Raymond's sickle sweet answer. Annalise curses under her breath and there's the shuffle of the phone being passed and then Annalise hears the breathing of her mother. She's waiting for her.

"Mama?" Annalise asks quietly, her voice timid. She regrets her tone as soon as the word leaves her mouth, and she immediately tells herself to quit it. None of that baby stuff was her anymore. She was grown. She was grown and she shouldn't have been whining.

"Ray says this is my Anna Mae, but I know that can't be true, 'cause my Anna Mae has enough sense to know how to answer her mama's phone calls."

Annalise breathes in. The name hadn't bothered her so much when it came from Raymond, excited about hearing his oldest sister on the phone. But coming from her Mama, those words made her feel just like she did all those years ago when that was the name everyone called her. Annalise wants to correct her, but she doesn't. There's no use. Not with her mama. Not on the phone anyways.

"I"m sorry, Mama. I've been real busy," she says apologetically. She's really only sorry that she has to have this conversation. That dissatisfied feeling that she hated had started twisting her stomach up so that it felt knotted, making her feel nauseous.

"Mmhmm," is the answer Annalise receives. "You too good to remember us now?"

"Of course not," Annalise answers quickly. "It's not like that; it never was, I just needed some time. I've been busy." She sighs. Her tone is calm, respectful, but she feels so out of control. She hates it. She's never been in control of her life, but she's trying her hardest to take the wheel now. And she hates that one minute on the phone can change all of that. She feels guilty. It wasn't like she meant to abandon her family; there was just something about the way she felt when she was around them and in Georgia that made her feel worth less than she did here in Boston. Or was it worthless?

"I'm coming down there tomorrow," Annalise tries, cutting her own thoughts off. Her mother is remaining relatively quiet, so she continues. "I got a bus ticket and presents for everyone. I'm all packed. The bus leaves at 5 in the morning; should get to Jasper by 10."

"You ain't want to come home Thanksgiving. What changed?" comes her Mama's voice. Annalise shouldn't have expected her to run out of steam so quickly.

"I didn't have the money for a bus ticket then, you know that," Annalise argues. Not like she'd talked to her mother or anything, but she knew how hard money was to come by. Money had always been hard to come by. Her frustration makes her usually carefully censored language slip from the normal, educated tone she uses at school back to the country drawl she'd developed from living in the South. "I'm coming now, and ain't that what matters?"

Now her mother really is quiet. They sit for an uncomfortably long period of time without saying anything to each other. Annalise wonders what she said to make her mother hush like that.

"Well, I'll see you tomorrow night," she says to break the silence. Hopefully she can end this call soon.

"Imma be sleep by the time you get in, chile, you know you're not that important. You ain't no president Clinton or nuthin'," Ophelia answers with a snort. "Ray'll come get you in the truck."

Strangely enough, this is the statement Annalise finds the most comforting so far. This is the kind of language she's used to. Gentle scolding, a quick tongue. No underlying hostility, though.

"Then I'll see you Sunday," she says. She pauses before sighing internally. "We can go to church together."

"Yeah, alright," her mother says. This seems to make her happy; or happy enough to bring down the attitude she has in her voice. She knows Annalise is compromising.

"I'm not sure God will recognize me," Annalise kind-of jokes. Her mom lets out a surprised cough that she thinks just might be a laugh.

"Mae, God knows your black behind just as well as I do," she answers. "I prayed to him about you enough times." There's a bit of commotion in the background, and Annalise hears her mother scolding someone, then a shout.

"Your baby brother won't stop bugging me about giving him this phone," she says. Annalise begins to smile again. Raymond did have a knack for bugging people to get what he wanted. "Just like a gnat! Wait a second, here he go."

That's all the goodbye Annalise gets before there's a shuffling of the phone being passed again, then Raymond's voice.

"Mae!"

"Raymond, what was that?" Annalise exclaims. If she was with him., she'd be smacking his arms. "You angry with me or something? You threw me right under the bus." Her brother is laughing on the other end.

"Just payback," he says, and Annalise can almost hear that wide, white smile that he always has. "Every time she gets off the phone from trying to call you, she be in a right awful mood, snapping on everybody that asks her anything."

"I told her I've been busy, you already knew that."

"Yeah, we knew," Ray answers. "Our Harvard girl. Being smart ain't easy."

"I'm not really that smart," Annalise tries, but Ray just snorts on the other end.

"Don't short yo'self, Mae, you know you're the smartest one in our family. You belong at that school," Annalise scoffs, but Ray changes the subject before she has the opportunity to object. "So you're coming down here?"

"I'll be there tomorrow night," Annalise answers. "You're supposed to come get me. 10 o'clock Ray, don't be late."

"We'll see," Raymond answers. Annalise groans and he laughs again. The sound is infectious enough to make Annalise smile. "Don't worry, I'll be there by 9:30, swear."

"You better," Annalise says. Raymond is still chuckling. She rolls her eyes as he speaks up again.

"Alright, well imma let you go. I'm not trying to get rid of you or anything, but Mama's finishing dinner and I ain't even set the table yet."

"Okay. Tell everyone hey for me."

"Mae?"

"Yeah?"

There's a knock at the door. Annalise glances at the clock. Lisa had to be gone by now. Maybe it was Kim. She takes a step towards her door.

"We love you down here. Can't wait to see you," Raymond says. He sounds genuine. Annalise smiles. She hasn't heard those words in a long time.

"Yeah, well, I love ya'll too."

"Bye, Mae."

"Bye, Ray."

Annalise hears him hang up with a click. She sets the phone down on the hook and sighs softly, running a hand through roots of her hair, now-fuzzy from all the scratching she'd been doing. There's another knock on the door, which pulls her out of her thoughts and gets her legs to start moving.

"Coming!" she shouts, stepping out of her room, carrying the phone with her. She sets it back in it's old place and puts it back in the wall before she moves to the door and smoothes out her sweatpants before opening the door, a slight smile lingering on her face. That smile doesn't last long, though, because she's immediately being hugged, so forcefully that she and the body attached to her stumble backwards into her living room. She doesn't have time to formulate a response, but she hears a laugh that makes her stomach flip. After the person pulls away, Annalise can move her hair out of her face and see that it's -

Eve. Fucking Eve. In an unbuttoned navy peacoat, white turtleneck and black skirt and tights. There's a light coating of snow dusting her clothes and her hair. Her curls are still perfect, though dusted even though it's nearly 9 o'clock. She must not have changed after class. Her face is bright, hopeful, and one of her hands is full: a bottle of wine, a wrapped present, and a lumpy foil package with a bow stuck on top are all in her grasp, hugged against her chest now so that she doesn't drop them.

"We made it!" she says excitedly. She's smiling, but her cheeks are pink. She's nervous. Annalise is pleasantly caught off guard, but she tries her hardest not to show it. Instead, she eyes Eve with a look of skepticism. "What, 6 exams and a gazillion hours of studying, but we made it!"

"Hey," is Annalise's answer, stepping past Eve to close the door. She's blushing. "I guess we did."

"I'd ask if I could come in, but I guess it's too late for that," Eve says, stepping over into Annalise and Lisa's makeshift kitchen, which is really just a wooden table set up across from the microwave. She immediately sets down the things she's carrying on the table before letting out a relieved huff. When she turns back to Annalise, she finds herself being assessed by Annalise's critical eyes.

"What?" she asks, voice completely innocent and unsuspecting. Annalise is trying her hardest not to smile.

"Why are you here?" she asks, suspiciously. Eve, however, is used her mood swings and doesn't miss a beat.

"Well, I have a present for you that I wanted to drop off," she begins, nodding at flawlessly wrapped gift sitting on the table. She'd sat it aside, and Annalise could see that there was a card attached. "And I thought maybe we could just hang out or something you know? Since I had to come over here anyways."

Annalise doesn't answer right away. She's trying to gauge Eve's answers. Eve is an honest person. She hasn't ever had any ulterior motives before, and she doesn't seem to have them now. But she flicks her eyes away from Annalise, and Annalise knows there has to be more. She wants to know what going on inside her head.

"Okay, but why are you really here?" Annalise asks, looking away briefly. Eve sighs, running a hand through her hair, loosening some of the curls. Annalise thinks she might have actually re-curled it before coming over. What would that mean?

"Oh come on, Annalise. You know why," Eve says, shaking her head slightly. She flicks her eyes down nervously, although the smile on her face doesn't fall. "Are you going to make me say it?"

When she looks back up, she's still under Annalise's callous gaze. She pauses for a second before twisting her mouth up and sighing.

"Fine," she says, picking at her nails. Her cheeks have gone from just pink to scarlet. "I missed you. I wanted to see you, is that so hard to believe?"

Annalise's face softens automatically. Here they go again. Eve had said the right thing, and now she didn't have any choice but to be nice.

"Not that hard to believe," she says slowly. "I mean, I'm a pretty great person."

Eve looks up, and catches Annalise's eyes before her smile slowly widens. She giggles, and then they're laughing together.

"Why do you always give me such a hard time?" Eve asks when their laughter dies out. She's rubbing her arm a bit, revealing that she's still worried. She turns to the table and grabs the gift she'd brought before holding it out to Annalise shyly. "Here. I hope you like it."

Annalise takes the present sheepishly, her eyes apologetic. She steps away, headed towards her room.

"Thanks," she says. "I have something for you too." Eve doesn't follow her when she steps into her room, so she calls: "You can sit down, of course."

Annalise says as she rummages in her closet. She grabs Eve's gift, before coming back into the living room. She carefully sits down next to Eve and hands her the small, wrapped, box. "Merry Christmas."

Eve smiles and takes the present before setting it in her lap and looking up at Annalise. She's got that little look on her face that Annalise recognizes she always has before she says something really nice. The thought makes her nervous and so she speaks up before Eve even has a chance to say thank you.

"So, what else did you bring?" She asks, motioning to the things on the table. Eve looks over like she'd forgotten about them before hopping up.

"Oh," she says, setting her gift down before grabbing the foil package and the bottle of wine. "Cookies and wine. I thought you might want to share." As she sits back down, Annalise raises her eyebrow.

"You made cookies?" she asked doubtfully. From what she understood, Eve lived off of cereal and bar food. Eve snorts and shakes her head.

"No," she says, rolling her eyes slightly. "I wouldn't make you eat those. I got them in the mail. My stepmom made them. You have to love overnight shipping, huh?"

"Oh," Annalise says, receiving a bit more clarity. "Stepmom?"

"Yeah," Eve says, glancing down at the foil package, which she's begun to unwrap. "She's alright." Annalise has more questions, but it doesn't really seem like Eve wants to talk about that, so she averts her attention to the cookies.

"I can have one?" she asks carefully. Eve nods, a slight smile still playing across her lips. Annalise reaches over and takes one before examining it. "Sugar?"

"Snickerdoodle," Eve answer, beginning to grin. Annalise takes a small bite and lets out a sound of approval as she chews.

"Wow, that's good," she says after she swallows. She takes another bite, larger this time. "Mmm." She goes to reach for a second, and Eve laughs, smacking her hand playfully. Annalise grins through a mouthful of cinnamon sugar.

"Are you going home? Because if you are, you've got to bring some of these back," she says in between bites. Eve leans back shaking her head slightly.

"I'm going to Knoxville, everyone's at my Grandmother's house," she says. "But I'll see if I can get Deborah to make you some more." She pauses for a second. "Are you going home?"

Annalise nods slowly, working her way through another bite of chewy cookie.

"Unfortunately," she says. "I'm taking the bus down with Kim in the morning. Or at least partway; she gets off in DC."

After she finishes her first cookie she nods at the alcohol in Eve's left hand.

"You brought wine, too?" she asks. "We're that fancy?" Eve shrugs.

"Maybe," she says vaguely. Annalise watches her for a second before she lets out an exaggerated sigh. "It came with the cookies."

Annalise has to laugh, making Eve chuckles too. She brushes the crumbs from her lips before getting up and heading to the kitchen. When she comes back, she has two plastic cups.

"We don't really have glassware," she explains, handing Eve a cup. She sits back down as Eve sets everything down in front of her before pausing and looking at Annalise.

"So does this mean I can stay, or..." she trails off, looking at Annalise hopefully. Annalise rolls her eyes slightly, eventually smiling.

"Of course, you can stay," she answers softly, grabbing the remote for the television. Eve smiles before removing her coat and folding it over the arm of the couch. When she turns back to Annalise, her eyes are bright. "Want to watch a movie?"

* * *

Two hours later, it's obvious to Annalise that Eve must have been more than tired when she came over because she's currently dozing off, her legs tucked underneath her and her head on Annalise's shoulder. It's A Wonderful Life was currently playing on the tv, and the now-empty foil sat in front of them on the table along with the half drunken bottle of wine. Annalise is currently debating whether or not she should place her arms around Eve's waist. It would make things more comfortable, but such an action would also require a certain bold streak that Annalise hadn't drunk up to yet.

She's just about to go in when the phone rings. Eve stirs slightly and Annalise freezes so that she doesn't wake her. When her breathing evens out again, she slides out from under her as carefully as she can and gets up to grab the phone.

"Hello?" she asks, picking up the remote and pressing MUTE.

"Hey, Annalise, it's Kim," she hears on the other end.

"Hey, Kim," Annalise says, cradling the phone between her shoulder and ear. She glances at Eve and lowers her voice. "What's up?"

"Just making sure we're set for tomorrow," she asks. "You have your ticket and everything, right?"

"Yeah," Annalise says, stretching. At least, she thinks she does. "You're coming here?"

"That's the plan," Kim answers. "I'll even bring you a granola bar or something." Annalise chuckles.

"You sound like Lisa," she says. Kim scoffs. "Sorry. But I'll be ready."

"4:30?" Annalise groans.

"4:30," she answers reluctantly. Kim chuckles now.

"You'll make it, girl," she says, encouragingly even though she's kind of giggling. "Alright, let me go to bed before I don't wake up until 10. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Bye," Annalise answers before hanging up. When she steps back over to the couch, Eve had woken up, at least mostly.

"Was that your boyfriend?" she asks, smiling tiredly. Annalise scoffs and sits back down.

"Funny," she says, running a hand through Eve's hair. Eve likes the feeling, and she moves in a bit closer, laying her head on Annalise's chest. Surprisingly, Annalise doesn't do much more than flinch. She was becoming used to Eve's touch, or at least, that's what she hoped. "You're really _super_ funny."

"You can catch my whole show at the comedy club on Friday nights," Eve says quietly, a smile on her face as she rubs her eyes tiredly. Annalise bites her lip before finally making the decision to wrap her arms around Eve's waist. She's quiet after she does it, ready for Eve to pull away, but she doesn't. She just cuddles a bit closer, folding her arms. They sit like that for a minute before Eve speaks up. "Did you need me to leave soon?"

Annalise wants the answer to be no. She looks over at the clock and sees that it's half past 11. She has to get up in 5 hours if she wants to make her bus by 5. So she sighs softly and nods her head a bit.

"That would probably be best," she says. "I'd let you stay over, but my bus leaves so early that it wouldn't be much help."

Eve doesn't move or speak for a second, though. Just sits in Annalise's arms and sighs.

"That's okay," she says slowly. "I don't know how I'm going to make it two weeks without seeing you." She smiles a bit and looks up at Annalise. She's teasing to a certain extent, but there's also a certain tone of honesty in her voice that makes Annalise blush slightly. She wishes she could kiss her. She parts her lips to speak, but no words come out. Eve understands and continues.

"Wait," she says, hopping up and turning to her coat. She rummages through a pocket before pulling out a crumpled receipt. "Do you have a pen?"

"Yeah," Annalise says, turning to the small end table on her side of the couch. She pulls a pen out of its drawer and hands it to Eve, curious to see what she needs it for.

To resolve Annalise's curiosity, Eve smoothes out the receipt and scrawls down 10 digits on the back of the small sheet of paper. She hands it to Annalise before recapping the pen and handing that to her as well.

"It's the number of where I'll be staying," she says, smiling a bit as she turns and grabs her coat. "You know, in case you want to talk, or you decide you miss me too." Annalise glances down at the paper, smiling a bit, then back at Eve.

 _ **Of course**_ _, I'll miss you_ she wants to say. She likes spending time with Eve, at least, when she's not trying to avoid her. She's funny. They make good friends. But when she glances at Eve's lips, mainly her bottom one that she's biting one, she doesn't want to just be her friend.

"I'll call you," she manages to say. Eve smiles a bit and nods before turning and grabbing her coat. Annalise stands as she does, and watches as she puts on her coat, making sure to button it.

"You can keep the wine," she says. "I promise to try and bring back more cookies." Annalise laughs softly as Eve grabs her present.

"Please do," she says, walking the taller girl to the door. They stand there for a second, before Eve glances off and back, opens her mouth, closes it, then opens it again.

"Can I, um, hug you again?" she asks, a bit timidly. She knows that Annalise isn't nearly as touchy as she is, and so Annalise appreciates the fact that she'd asked. Her cheeks darken immediately, but she nods.

"Of course."

Eve's arms immediately wrap around Annalise. The hug is quick but tight, and it comforts Annalise more than she'd expected it would.

"Thank you," Eve says when she pulls back. "For my gift. And for letting me stay."

"You're welcome," Annalise answers. She pauses a bit before remembering that she has to open the door, and so she does so hurriedly with a blush on her face.

"Bye," Eve says, so quietly it's almost a whisper.

"Bye," Annalise says back. Then Eve is gone, and she's alone again, but everything inside of her wishes that she wasn't.

* * *

When Annalise's alarm clock goes off at 4 in the morning, she almost cries.

She turns over and hits the clock until the excessively annoying beeping ceases before groaning and sitting up. Then she has to swing her legs over the edge of the bed and stand, even though her body still feels like it's asleep

As she moves through the motions of getting ready, she feels like a robot: quick shower, put on lotion, brush her teeth, get dressed, fix her hair, forget her hair - put on a hat, then get her bags and wait. She does remember to grab Lisa and Eve's gifts to open on Christmas, along with the presents she'd bought everyone else. Just when she's sitting down, there's a knock on her door.

Kim is unreasonably cheery for it to be so early. When Annalise opens the door, she thrusts a granola bar into her hand and pulls her out of the apartment, chattering about how excited she is to get home. Annalise isn't really paying attention, though, not while they walk to the first bus stop, or while they ride it from Cambridge to Boston, or even when they get to the second and final bus stop, where there's a crowd of people, most of them just as happy as Kim to go home. No, Annalise is too tired to listen. She doesn't even say anything even mildly intelligible back to Kim until after they're on the bus, sitting close to the front. Kim was nice enough to let Annalise have the window seat. She's nudging her with her right elbow now.

"Annalise, what about you?" she asks. "You excited to see your people?"

Annalise thinks over the question as the bus pulls off.

"Yeah," she answers, but it sounds empty. As she watches Boston fly by, she prays that things don't turn out awful. She doesn't want to fight with her mama. She doesn't want things to be like they were before. Eventually, she lets the rock of the bus and the city lights lull her back to sleep.


	8. Yellow Walls and Whispering

**_Well, this is a very, very, late chapter, but a long one so I hope it makes up for the long wait. There are some important things in here, and I think you all will like it. It's not completely OC though, because I had described Annalise's family before they were introduced on the show but, hopefully, you all think the characterization is accurate. Thanks for reading_**!

The trip to Georgia is too quick. By normal standards it was an extremely long ride of course. The trip from Massachusetts to Georgia was 16 hours plus on its own, and that was without all the stops. After Kim left in D.C., Annalise just spent most of the time sleeping. They were supposed to get into Georgia by 10, but it ended up being almost 12 when they pulled up at the Atlanta bus station. Annalise had been under the impression that she would be able to get off in Jasper, but when she opens her eyes, she finds herself waking up under the bright florescent lights of the bus in the middle of the city. She ended up having to lug her things to the payphone, call Raymond and tell him where she was before waiting over an hour for him to come and pick her up in their pickup truck.

It was insane, but Annalise hadn't resented all of the mess that had happened. Instead, she'd actually kind of appreciated it. No matter how long she waited to go home though, she'd never be prepared to walk inside. Unfortunately, she realizes this just as Raymond pulls up in the gravel driveway and shuts the truck off.

"You awake?" he asks, nudging her. Annalise sighs and shifts in her seat before sitting up straight and nodding slowly.

"Yeah," she says her voice dry.

"Alright then, c'mon," Raymond says, opening the door and climbing out. He gets Annalise's suitcase and bag of presents from the back of the truck, before walking up to the front door with her. He glances over as her gets out his key from his jacket pocket. "What's your face all screwed up for?

Annalise hadn't known she was pulling a face, and she quickly tries to straighten her mouth out, but she couldn't help thinking about the house and everything that happened in it. It wasn't their first house, but the one they'd lived in for most of her life. She remembered all the times she came running back to it. It used to be a source of comfort. Now the creak of the wooden porch under her feet made her skin crawl and she felt like running away again.

"Nothing," she says, stepping into the house after Raymond unlocks the door and walks inside himself. She follows him blindly into the dark hallway, holding her hand out to follow the wall which she knows still must be covered by the ugly yellow wallpaper she had never liked; not when they moved in, not now. It was never bright, or happy, like yellow should be, but dull like mustard and stained by her and her siblings' handprints and various scuffs. Annalise had always wanted it to be the color of sunshine, but instead it was just like yellow mud. She used to be able to pretend it was brighter, but eventually, her imagination had faded along with the color of the wallpaper.

They push into the room at the end of the narrow hallway. It's her and her sister's old bedroom, the bed is the same, with its creaky wooden frame and faded floral sheets. It doesn't look like much has changed, with the walls still covered from floor to ceiling with posters and magazine pages.

"You're staying in here," Raymond says, dropping Annalise's things next to the chesser drawer. "Church is tomorrow, get some sleep." Annalise groans a bit, having forgotten her promise to attend church. According to the desk clock, she'd have to be up 6 hours if she wanted to get up at 8 and make 9 o'clock service.

"Right," she says grudgingly, rubbing her eyes. Raymond smiles. He knows how she is when she doesn't get enough sleep. Annalise looks up, looking around the room one more time. "Wait, isn't this your room now? I don't want to throw you out."

"I ain't sleep in here since I was six, remember Mae?" Raymond says, raising an eyebrow at her as he rubs his neck. "Mama put that cot in the little room with the washer and dryer a long time ago. So you got your old room back." Annalise pauses before nodding, a bit of a smile on her face, tired as she is.

"Where's everybody else staying?"

"Well Loretta's living with her man; you know mama hate that. Celestine's taking care of grandma, living with her in her house. Mary, we don't even know about. She stay with auntie or godmama most of the time, but she can get kind of wild you know."

"Yeah, I know," Annalise said, thinking of her youngest sister. Annalise had always wanted to be like her, even though she was the oldest. Mary was the beautiful one of the family, with upturned eyes and Raymond's wide smile. Her father had been mixed, and she had lucked out and gotten a texture of hair that Annalise envied even now. Back when she was small and still believed in God, she used to pray that he would switch their bodies - and one morning it would be Annalise who woke up with that smooth light brown skin and the charm everyone born in the South was supposed to have. God never answered her, though, and eventually, she started believing in things she could see.

Raymond watches Annalise, and he seems to notice that she starts to drift off because he coughs to bring her attention back to him.

"Right then. I'll see you in the morning. If the idea of church don't wake you up, remember that we're gonna be having breakfast. I'll make sure mama makes pancakes."

"Okay," Annalise says, making the effort to keep a small smile on her face. When Raymond leaves, though, it falls. A sigh takes its place on her lips as she sinks into the bed, whose springs creak in protest. She here now. Really here. She doesn't want to think about it, doesn't want to evaluate too much and turn things over and over in her mind until they're worn and stringy like she always does. She's ready to drop anyways. So she takes off her bus clothes, which she's sure smell like exhaust fumes, and kicks them into the corner as a small act of defiance against the neat woman sleeping down the hall. Then she puts on some pajamas - real ones that button up and everything, a gift of course from her mother that she had only worn once before. She doesn't bother to start unpacking; her eyelids feel too heavy for any of that. Instead, she just pulls the comforter back and climbs in under that, not even feeling up to pulling back the sheets. It's just more to mess with in the morning. Her thoughts are becoming more and more disjointed as her eyelids begin to feel heavier and heavier. Ugh, the morning. At least there would be pancakes. She loved pancakes. She hadn't had one since...Eve. Eve? Pancakes. She'd gone and gotten pancakes with Eve Rothlo, that morning after they worked out. She liked being with Eve. She was smart and kind and when she wrapped her arms around Annalise it made her feel safer than anyone else ever had. Besides her mama maybe. She used to rock Annalise when she was smaller, even though she was still too big to be getting rocked. She must have been 6 or 7. Before her uncle. And she would sing. Even though Ophelia couldn't match pitch if her life depended on it. Yes, she would sing. Badly. Things from church mostly. Annalise can't remember the tune, but a line from one hymn sticks out to her in her mind.

"What can wash away my sin?"

She doesn't stay awake long enough to remember the answer.

Instead of waking up to bus lights and the noise of the city, this time, Annalise wakes up to yellow sunshine and a sharp smack on her thigh. She thinks she prefers the former to the latter.

"Git up girl," she hears. It's a distinct voice, bathed in an accent and spit out of a mouth with a few missing teeth. It's one that Anna Mae tells her to listen to. Ophelia. "If you wanna eat, you need to get up and wash the sand outta your eyes." She feels another shake, then the covers being yanked away. This makes Annalise opens her eyes, but all she can see of her mother is a flash of gray hair and the blue material of her robe before she leaves the room. When the door shuts behind her, Annalise gets herself to sit up and blink a few times. The first thing she notices after she regains her sight is the smell of the house. It's everything that's good about Sunday. It's bacon and eggs and biscuits and maybe even maple syrup? Maple syrup means pancakes, and that thought spurs Annalise to stand and stretch.

After she's up, she glances at the clock on the bedside table. It's just barely 7. Of course. She shouldn't have expected to get a full 6 hours. Yawning, she steps outside of the room and heads into the hall bathroom.

When she comes back, showered and now much more awake, her mind has had the opportunity to clear a bit. The first thing she sees when she steps into the room is that her mother has draped a dress and a church coat over the now-made bed. Annalise inhales slowly and takes a step towards the dress, still on a hanger. It's mostly black with fitted sleeves and a rounded white collar - not particularly ugly, but the style isn't what Annalise is worried about. She knew this dress. Carefully - like it might burn her - she reaches out and rubs the material through her fingers, This was one of the hand-me-downs she'd received, probably from her grandmother on a holiday. She guessed it was better than one of the dresses she'd gotten from that dusty old box at church. Sighing, she turns away. If her mother wanted her to wear the dress, she'd wear it. But she wouldn't be the same girl she had been the last time she'd worn it.

Annalise gets ready as quickly as she normally does, and so when she steps out of her room and into the kitchen, Raymond isn't at the table yet. It's just her mother, making bacon on the stove. In the center of the kitchen table, Annalise sees everything else she had smelled. Eggs and biscuits piled high on separate platters, along with a glorious stack of pancakes. There's syrup too, and honey, and butter. Annalise licks her lips, but she doesn't speak in those first few seconds after she walks in. She just listens the pop of the grease in the pan, and her mother's backside swaying to a tune only she can hear. She must be in a good mood, but that doesn't make her any less intimidating. Ophelia isn't a tall woman, but she stands with perfect posture and wears her robe like it's an ermine cape.

"You forget how to speak?" she finally says. Annalise shakes her head initially, even though her mother's back is to her. She gently lays her coat of the back on a chair.

"No, ma'am," Annalise says, her voice quiet. She mentally tells herself to speak up, so that her mother doesn't have to. "Good morning." Her mother makes a hmphing sound and slightly shakes the bacon in the pan.

"Good morning, Anna Mae."

Annalise shuts her eyes in response to this. It was too early for this. It was Sunday and not even 8 o'clock and her mother was already antagonizing her. When she opens her eyes, she has to think about what to say and how to say it before opening her mouth.

"Annalise," is all she manages to get out. It takes effort for her to say this, but her mom just flicks her eyes back at her. "I go by Annalise."

"That's not the name your daddy and I gave you. That's not the name I'm going to call you in this house."

"My daddy-" Annalise starts, her voice hardening.

"You stop that whining, Mae."

Annalise has to take a breath. It's not worth it. she tells herself. And it's not. Besides, picking an argument with Ophelia was just like asking for a verbal whipping.

"Do you need any help?" Annalise asks, changing the subject. Her mother snorts.

"Cooking?" she asks, incredulously. A chuckle escapes her throat. "Naw, not from you. You still burn water?"

Annalise breathes out from her nose but when her mother turns, she sees a bit of a smile on her face.

"You can set the table, though," she says eventually. "Imma be done in a minute. And if Raymond ain't up by the time you finish, you can holler at 'im for me.

"Yes ma'am," Annalise says, her voice more compliant than it has been since she left this house. She hates the way it sounds when she has to speak like this, but she knows what respect is. Or at least she knows what her mother expects of her. So she quietly gets the dishes from the cabinet and sets the table, putting out plates, silverware, and napkins folded to look like triangles. Just as she finishes the third place setting, Raymond appears in the kitchen, sleep still in his eyes.

"Morning mama," he says, yawning towards the end of the greeting, earning him a look from Ophelia.

"Good morning, Ray. Button that shirt to the top."

Raymond does just that, buttoning his stiffly ironed shirt up and tucking it into his suit pants before tightening his belt. His waist is so small that the pants are still a little loose, even though the belt is on the last loop. Annalise silently wishes for his metabolism as he nabs a biscuit from the table and stuffs the whole thing in his mouth before Ophelia can see.

"Morning Anna," he says after he swallows.

"Morning, Ray," Annalise says, smiling for the first time this morning.

The process that follows is quick and planned. Breakfast in the morning on Sundays at this

house always tasted like heaven, but felt more like a meeting than a meal. Ophelia brought the bacon from the stove and dumped into out onto an empty platter before sticking the pan in the pink and sitting. After she sat, Annalise and Raymond did as well. The first thing to do was pray. Annalise couldn't have forgotten that. They all joined hands, and her mother prayed. It always seemed like whenever she prayed, she was intent on letting God know exactly how thankful she was and how blessed the family was. She blessed the biscuits and the bacon. She blessed the pancakes and the butter pads. She blessed the eggs, and the bottle of syrup. She blessed the silverware and the napkins. She blessed herself, and the pan she used to cook, and lastly, she blessed Raymond, then Annalise.

After everything was all blessed, the family dug in. There was a little chit-chat, but not much. A quiet table was a compliment in this house - it meant everyone was too busy enjoying their food to make small talk. Annalise couldn't remember the last time she ate like this. There were a few things she missed about home, and the cooking may have been at the top of the list. She ate until her stomach was full, suprising her mother.

"They don't feed you at that fancy school?" Ophelia asks. Annalise mumbles something unintelligible through a mouthful of pancake. Ophelia frowns at this, and Annalise probably would have been scolded if her mother hadn't caught sight of the clock just then.

"It's time to head to the church," she said, setting her fork down and standing. "Raymond, you go out and start the truck up. Mae, I need you to wrap all this food up. I'm gonna finish getting dressed."

Annalise and Raymond do as told. As their mother steps out of the kitchen, Raymond grabs the keys and his coat from the hall closet, then heads outside, and Annalise gets the Reynold's wrapper from a cabinet drawer. She covers all of the remaining food and finds places for the platters in the fridge, then collects the dishes from the table and starts washing them in the sink. This had always been her job for as long as she had lived in the house, and after 25 years, she'd gotten pretty good at it. By the time her mother comes back, now fully dressed, Annalise is putting the last of the silverware away.

"C'mon Mae, time to go," she says, adjusting her purse on her shoulder. Annalise puts on her coat, and together they leave the house, and Raymond, who is waiting by the truck, locks the door with the keys after they step out. He also helps their mother into the truck before climbing into the driver's seat. Annalise gets in last, hopping up while doing her best to stay modest, and keep from squishing her mother in the seat. However, she notices that the front seat is kind of roomy, even with all three of them in the truck. She reminds herself to ask if her mother is losing weight at some point. Having this thought affirmed wouldn't surprise her, because as Raymond drives, she glances at her mother, and notes that her floral dress is swallowing her. Maybe it's part of getting older.

The church is less than 5 minutes away, and so they arrive on time. Thankfully, Ophelia hadn't made them come early enough to attend Sunday school. Annalise might not have been able to sit through that. Raymond parks under a tree in the back of the makeshift parking lot, which is really just gravel poured on top of dirt. Annalise opens her door and slides out, smoothing down her dress in the back, then carefully helps her mother out of the truck while Raymond locks up. Then, together, they enter the small white building as a family.

The first thing that hits Annalise when they step into the church is the heat. It was no secret that most of the African-American community despised being cold, but this was Georgia, not Massachusetts and Annalise didn't think the amount of heat in the building was at all necessary. As soon as they sit down, she wiggles out of her coat, and out of the corner of her eye, she notices Raymond doing the exact same thing. Her family slides into a pew close to the back, and an usher passes down programs and she takes one. When she opens it, she scans down the long agenda of things to be done and internally sighs. Service is going to be long.

She doesn't understand exactly how long until she realizes 2 hours and 6 hymns later that there hasn't even been a sermon yet. She thinks that on the other side of her mother, Raymond has fallen asleep, because she keeps hearing small snores.

Finally, the pastor stands in the pulpit. He's a round, dark skinned man, with thinning hair and a purple robe. Beads of sweat have already collected on his forehead before he speaks. Annalise decides to focus on what he has to say, or to at least try to.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, I've come here today to tell you that Satan has it out for you," the pastor starts, his voice booming. The organist taps the keys. "He want your soul."

Annalise changes her mind then, and decides that trying to pay attention is hopeless.

When they get out of service, it's after 12 o'clock and Annalise is starving. People keep coming up to her though, telling her how they miss seeing her around and how she needs to study less and come home more often. It wouldn't bother her so much if her mother didn't seem to be on everyone's side but Annalise.

"Yeah, you know she was ready to get out the house," she hears her mother saying to the pastor. "She got tired of her old mama."

"She likes Massachusetts better," Ophelia says to one of the deacons. "You know, people up there are smart, not like us."

"She don't like coming home you know," she says to one of the church matriarchs. "We too country for her."

Annalise knew her mother didn't like her leaving, but she did not like to hear her talking about her either. Quite honestly, she hated it. It wasn't fair at all. Why was she being punished for being the first one in the family to even go to college?

When they step out of the church, it's a relief. Annalise gulps in a breath of fresh air.

"I ain't see Loretta at church," her mother comments. "Raymond, you wanna take Anna Mae by the shop? I can catch a ride home with one of the deaconesses."

Ophelia doesn't really wait for an answer, but instead shuffles over to another woman. Raymond looks at Annalise with a sheepish smile and shrugs.

"Ready?"

Annalise nods, and together they head to the truck and get in. Raymond starts it up, and shakily pulls out of the parking lot and onto the road. Annalise wants to feel excited, but isn't sure what to expect. They're headed to her sister Loretta's beauty shop, where she works with her 'boyfriend", who is a barber. Annalise hadn't seen her since she left for Harvard. Loretta was a firecracker, and the one most likely to challenge (or maybe just disappoint) their mother. Annalise scratches her scalp. Maybe she'd at least get a free hair appointment out of this. She had been wanting to take out these itchy braids for awhile anyways.

Raymond pulls up at the shop in record time. It's a unique building, painted pink and blue with a large neon SALON sign in the front window. It's definitely Loretta's.

"There's a phone inside. Call the house when you're ready to come on home," Raymond says, nodding at Annalise. Annalise nods back and hops out of the truck, deciding to leave her coat in the car, and heads into the shop.

Inside, it smells nice, like fresh shampoo and cocoa butter. Loretta's back is Annalise when she comes in, and she doesn't turn at the jingle of the front door, so Annalise has to clear her throat. When she turns though, her eyes widen and she quickly leaps over to Annalise, leaving the woman whose hair she's curling abandoned in her chair.

"Mae!" she says, throwing her arms around her neck. "I heard you were back!"

"Hey Loretta," says Annalise, staggering under the force of her sister's bear hug.

"How's everything going? Mama giving you a hard time? You want your hair done?"

That's how Loretta is, question after question, not giving any time for Annalise to answer. She tries her best to answer each question the best she can, though, and ends up in Loretta's chair right after the other woman leaves.

"Where's Junior?" Annalise asks as Loretta starts cutting the ends of her braids off, before she starts to undo them. Luckily, she has quick fingers. Junior is Loretta's man, of course. The one that her mother couldn't stand.

"Went down the street to grab some soul food," Loretta answers, wiggling her hips. "You hungry?"

Annalise's stomach growls in response, and they both laugh.

"When am I not?" Annalise answers. She is finally able to begin relaxing like this. The salon chair was comfortable, it wasn't burning up, and most importantly, there was no one talking about how she was a deadbeat daughter.

This was the kind of thing she wanted to do on Sunday.

Three hours later, Annalise has neat rows of cornrows going her back, and a stomach full of sweet potato, mac and cheese, and chicken. Although she enjoyed every moment at the shop, she was glad Loretta braided fast because she had started to have to pee around the halfway mark.

After going to the bathroom, Annalise calls Raymond, who comes to get her. On the ride home, the tiredness from yesterday starts to hit her, and she nearly falls asleep by the time they reach the house. When they step into the house, her mother is entertaining in the living room, but Annalise's slips by with a few comments about being tired and successfully makes it to her room, where she decides to hide for the rest of the night in order to recharge.

Maybe this won't be so bad, she thinks as she changes out of her dress into shorts and a tshirt. She almost forgets about her mother talking about her as she lays down to nap.

But not for long.

Sometime around 11 that night, Annalise decides to get up for a glass of water and an aspirin to stop her head from aching. But when she steps out into the hallway, she hears her mother talking to someone. It had seemed like she was done entertaining. When Annalise stops to listen closely, she hears her sister's voice. Then her mother's again.

"I don't know what to do with Anna Mae," she says. "She's been just as selfish and ornery today as she was when was left when she was eighteen. It makes me look bad."

There she goes, complaining again. It's been a day, and she's fed up with Annalise. Annalise is fed up too. And so she steps into the room at this point, anger on her face.

"You are not being fair," she says, standing in front of her mother. Her sister looks at her, then her mother and closes her mouth. Annalise's eyes have that hard look in them that tell everyone she means business.

"I don't know what you're talking about," her mother says, crossing her arms and raising her eyebrows.

"You know exactly what I'm talking about."

There's a pause. Annalise is giving her mother a chance to concede, and Ophelia is wondering if Annalise is really going argue with her. She was not raised in a household where it was alright to argue with your elders, and so it did not make sense for her to argue now. But that doesn't stop Annalise.

"You keep talking to everyone about me. And I know people talk, but why do you need to tell them that I left? Why do you always make it sound like I just chose to leave because I wanted to get away from you? Like I just don't care about you, or any of the family anymore. Like I just abandoned you-"

"You tryna say you didn't leave?" Celestine pops in, and Annalise shoots daggers at her with her eyes, quieting her.

"You did leave, Anna Mae," Ophelia finally says, her voice flat. "You left your family. Now, if I wanna talk to someone about you, then that's my business, not yours."

"I didn't leave ya'll," Annalise insists, struggling not to raise her voice. "I am right here."

"You ran off to that college as soon as you could, right after high school. Then instead of coming back home and staying, you decide to go off to Harvard as soon as you can. You start thinking you're too good for us. Don't wanna take nobody's calls, or talk to no one at church. Just cause you smart now."

"I'm just trying to get an education, mama. I'm not trying to act like I'm too good for anybody -"

"You're not being yourself anymore. You're not being Anna Mae, you tried to make yourself into someone else - "Annalise". Annalise that don't talk country and don't have no family to worry about. Annalise that spends all day locked up in her room instead of spending time with the people that love her."

Annalise is getting frustrated, despite all of the effort she's putting into staying calm, her eyes are stinging and there's a lump in her throat.

"I'm ain't being nobody but me," she tries, but her mother is on a roll.

"Sure you. Prancing around in Massa-choosetts, only taking care of yourself. I ain't raise you like that. I raised you to be proud of where you came from. Instead,you walk around here, acting ashamed of where you came from. Trying to be uppity and white-" Ophelia says. Annalise has had it.

"Success ain't only for white people, mama!" she exclaims, angry. Her voice rings through the house. Her sister looks shocked, but her mother's eyes only narrow. She's daring Annalise to keep going, and so she does.

"I ain't trying to be white, I'm trying to be successful. I'm trying to make something of myself. I'm tired of being Anna Mae. I'm tired of having everyone feel bad for me. I had to leave to go to school, and I'm sorry I had to leave all of ya'll behind. But I don't feel bad for getting out of Jasper. But I do not feel bad for having goals. I do not feel bad for wanting to do more than just be like you and grandmama, cleaning other people's house's all day long - just being a glorified slave-"

Ophelia smacks Annalise across the face, quick as a whip. The crack of her hand on her daughter's cheek is audible throughout the house. When Annalise straightens up she cups her cheek, wipes the tears falling from her eyes, and looks at her mom, who is livid.

"You get out of this house," Ophelia says, her voice quiet but fierce.

"Mama-" Celestine tries to interject. Finally, she tries to save Annalise. But it's too late now.

"No," Ophelia says, her mind made up. "You think I'm a glorified slave Anna Mae? Think you're so smart cause you're in school and you got goals? Then get up out of my house and take care of yourself." Then her mother walks past her. Annalise turns slightly, pursing her lips as she watches her mother push past Raymond - who was eavesdropping in the hall - and enters her room. She doesn't even slam her door. She doesn't have to. She has just won the argument.

It's Raymond who speaks up first.

"Annalise-" he tries to start. But she doesn't want to listen. Silently and quickly she turns away from her sister and goes down the hall. She steps into her room - her old room - and closes the door behind her. And then she cries. She cries because she's angry that things ended up exactly like they thought they would. She cries because no matter what she does, she is not the child her mother wants.

She cries until she's too exhausted to do anything but fall asleep.

Eventually, Annalise wakes up to Raymond knocking.

"You gotta eat something, Mae," he calls. She doesn't answer of course. She hears Raymond sigh. "Have it your way. There's a plate on the table for you if you decide to come out of that room."

Annalise hears him walk away, but she doesn't stir at all. Why would there be a plate for her? Raymond must have made it himself. Because there was no way her mother made one after last night. She didn't even want Annalise to be here.

Annalise didn't know why the whole situation bothered her so much. She didn't know why she hated being home. She didn't know why her mother didn't see her going to Harvard as a good thing. Annalise didn't understand anything, and no one understood her.

Her mother told her to leave. Told her to get out.

She should listen. She should leave. She didn't belong here anymore. Maybe she never had. She was all cried out and exhausted. And it definitely didn't feel like Christmas time. But she didn't know how she was supposed to leave. She couldn't go back to school. She didn't want to stay in Georgia. She was stuck.

She sighs and looks over at the clock. It's just after 5 o clock. She should at least start packing. It wasn't like she had taken much out anyways. With a small groan, she gets up and shuffles across the floor to her jacket, laying on the ground. When she picks it up, though, something flutters out of the of the pocket. Annalise bends down to pick it up, and when it's in her hand she sees that it's an old receipt to the campus cafe. She almost tosses it in the trash, but then she sees something on the back. She flips it over and sees 9 digits scrawled across the small piece of paper.

Eve's number.

To be fair, with all of the mess that had happened with her family, Annalise had almost completely stopped thinking about Eve for the first time in months. She doesn't even know how this number ended up in her pocket after that last night they spent together. But this is the answer to her prayers. Eve has always been there for her. She can talk to her. She can save Annalise from being alone.

Maybe there is a God.

Annalise has to sneak out of her room to go to talk on the kitchen phone. However, her mother doesn't seem to be home. With shaking hands, she dials the number from the receipt. It rings. Once, twice, three times...

"Hello?" answers a pleasant voice.

"Eve?" Annalise asks, slumping against the wall.

"Oh, no honey. But she's here. One minute." There's rustling, and Annalise crosses the fingers on her free hand.

Please please please

"Hello?" answers another voice. This one Annalise recognizes.

"Eve, it's me," she says, exhaling in relief.

"Annalise!" Eve says, obviously excited. "Hey! I've missed you so much. How is your break going?"

"Um," Annalise starts, but Eve can already tell something's off. On her end of the line, she frowns.

"Annalise, what's wrong?" she asks, her tone gentle.

"Nothing really," Annalise tries, but Eve doesn't even answer. She's waiting. "I just feel like I shouldn't have even come. There's my mother and my family and I just feel like...like I'm suffocating. I need to get out, and I can't go anywhere. No one wants me here, and they've made that clear." Tears have started welling up in Annalise's eyes again and she wipes them away angrily. She's sick of crying.

"You're saying you want to leave?" Eve asks, slowly. "What happened?"

"It's always been like this, I'm not sure," Annalise says, her voice cracking. "I just should have never come back."

The line is quiet for a minute.

"Where are you?" Eve finally asks.

"What?"

"Where are you, Annalise?"

"I'm in Jasper, Georgia. At my mother's house," Annalise answers slowly.

"And you want to leave?" Eve asks again. Annalise bobs her head.

"Well yes," she says.

"What's your address?" Eve asks. Annalise hears shuffling and bumping in the background, and some shouting. She frowns.

"What's going on Eve?" she asks.

"I'm coming to get you. Now, what's your address?"

"There's no way you can... Eve you don't have to," Annalise stutters. But she hears Eve grunt on the other end and she knows it's too late.

"Your address, Annalise."

It takes Eve isn't able to leave her house until 6 o'clock that night, and then it takes her around 3 hours to get to Jasper. It probably would have taken less time, but she wasn't the best navigator and she had to stop several times to ask for directions. Eventually, she pulls up at a comfortable looking house brick house with red shutters. The name on the mailbox is Harkness, and so Eve pulls up in the gravel driveway before hopping out. It's dark outside, and Eve knows that it has to be after 9 o'clock now. She's a bit nervous for some reason, but she tells herself to shake it off as she shuts off her car and gets out. She walks up the driveway and porch steps before knocking on the door quietly. There's no answer, and so after a minute, she knocks again, a little bit harder.

The door swings open after she knocks the second time. Standing in front of her is a boy that she assumes is Annalise brother. He has her smooth brown skin and white teeth, even though he's around Eve's height. His face is round and childlike, with dimples. He's smiling when he opens the door, but when he sees Eve, his mouth straightens into a flat line.

"Who're you?" he asks, leaning against the doorframe. His voice has the same suspicious tone that Eve is so used to hearing from Annalise. It makes her smile a bit, which the boy doesn't seem to understand.

"Something funny?"

"No," Eve says, shaking her head slightly. She knows her cheeks have to be turning pink. "I'm um, Eve. I'm looking for Annalise."

"Annalise?" the boy questions, his eyebrows knitting together. "We don't have no Annalise." Eve shakes her head a bit, confused.

"I'm almost sure this is the address she gave me," she says slowly, reaching into her pocket. "There's no Annalise Harkness?" The boy frowns at first, but then his eyes widen.

"You mean Anna Mae?" he says. Eve starts to respond, but he's already turning around, leaving the door open. "Mae!" Eve hears him call. "There's some white girl here for you!" Eve doesn't know what exactly to do, so she just stands on the porch; uncomfortable and more than a bit confused.

Annalise is in her room when she hears Raymond calling her. She stands up as there's a knock on the door, then Raymond bursts in.

"You hear me, Mae? There's some white girl here for you, and man is she fine," he says, straightening his shirt. "Is that your friend? And can you invite her in?"

"No," Annalise says, grabbing her bag. She's shaking in surprise. Eve came all the way from Knoxville just to get her. Just for her. "I'm leaving."

"You're leaving?" Raymond asks. "Wait, this about the argument you had with Mama? You know she wasn't serious, come on Mae. Wednesday's Christmas Eve, you gotta stay." Annalise grabs her purse from her bed, shoving her makeup bag in. She's too preoccupied to even correct him about her name.

"You heard her Ray, she don't want me here," Annalise says, wrinkling her nose to disguise the fact that her eyes are watering. "Ya'll presents are in the closet, I need you to hand them out on Christmas."

"Mae, you're not thinking," Raymond says, following her as she walks out of her room. "I know you smart and all, but you're making the wrong decision."

"Staying is the wrong decision," Annalise says, stopping at the end of the hallway. She doesn't want Eve to see them arguing. She doesn't want her to really know any of what's going on. Ray looks at Annalise, his face frustrated.

"Fine. Wait a second," he says, jiggling the door handle to the door across the hallway. That's their mama's room. and Annalise wouldn't dare go in there, no matter what.

"Ray," she hisses. "What are you doing?" Raymond pays her no mind and peeps his head in before slipping inside. Annalise turns away, the child in her unreasonably afraid for Raymond. When he comes back out, he has a wrapped box in his grasp, which he quickly stuffs into Annalise's hand.

"Here," he says. "You don't open that 'till Christmas, you hear?"

"Raymond," Annalise starts, but he shakes his head.

"You don't start that whining now," he says, folding his arms. His voice is chastising, and anyone listening would think that he was the oldest sibling. "You gotta do what you think is right I guess, but you don't need to make it harder for me. Now go on, get out of here 'fore mama comes back and sees you."

Annalise hesitates, but then quickly wraps her arms around Raymond's skinny neck in a quick hug.

"Thanks. Ray," she whispers. She sticks the present under her arm before stepping out of the hallway and making her way to the door, where Eve is waiting. She knows the polite thing to do is at least ask Eve inside, but she honestly does not want to risk the chance of running into her mother.

"Hey, Annalise," Eve says as Annalise steps outside, closing the door behind her. "You ready?"

Annalise nods in reply and Eve reaches out a takes her suitcase for her before stepping down the porch steps and leading the way to her car. Annalise follows behind, her arms wrapped around herself. She'd already been upset when she called Eve, and thinking things over and over for the past 3 hours hadn't made anything better. She was exhausted from keeping herself together but she didn't dare slip up and start crying again. Eve unlocks the door for her before popping the trunk and tossing Annalise's suitcase in. Annalise gets in the car while Eve closes the trunk, playing with a loose string on her flannel.

Eve opens the door on her side before getting in the car and starting it up. She closes the door behind her before looking over at Annalise.

"You want to talk about it?" she asks carefully, her hands on the wheel. "Any of it?"

"No," Annalise says, chewing her bottom lip.

"Alright," Eve says, turning behind her and backing out. "You can control the radio."

Annalise seems to prefer the quiet, so that's what they drive in.

Eventually, they stop at a diner with a bright OPEN LATE sign just across the Tennessee border. They would have kept going, but Annalise's stomach had growled and Eve insisted on getting her something to eat. She herself takes advantage of 24-hour breakfast sign hanging under the first and orders a chicken and waffle meal along with a glass of orange juice. Annalise doesn't feel like eating much, but she orders a side of fries along with a chocolate milkshake in hopes of lifting her spirits. But when it comes out, she just sits and stirs it, too reluctant to take a sip.

"You sure you don't want to talk about it?" Eve asks quietly, picking up a chicken strip. Annalise shakes her head slightly.

"I don't know how," she admits softly. She looks up at Eve though and purses her lips together before glancing back down. "I can't believe you actually came and got me. "

"Yeah?" Eve says, taking a bite of her food. "Well, what was I supposed to do? You were upset, and I care about you, so I had to do something."

Annalise blushes and picks at her fries.

"Not everyone does things like that," she says slowly. "Actually, I can't imagine anyone else who would do that." Eve shrugs, but she's nervous. She hopes that she made the right decision. She didn't know if she'd gone too far; maybe far enough to push Annalise away.

"Too much?" she asks gently, trying to smile, even though it feels like her insides are playing tag.

"It's the sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me," Annalise says. "Thank you. Thank you so much." It's hard for her to say thank you, as bad as that sounds. Maybe just because she's not used to having to ask for help. If the results would always be this thoughtful, though, she would ask more.

When she looks back up at Eve, she's just barely smiling. Eve immediately lets out a relieved sigh, smiling as well.

"You always scare the hell out of me," she says, taking a deep breath. "You're so welcome. And um, of course, I was kind of glad you called, even if that's horrible. I wanted to see you."

"You didn't mind the crying?" Annalise asks. Somehow, hearing that Eve didn't mind doing all of this, and was even happy to see her was making her feel a little better. She picks at her fries a bit more before picking one up and trying it. It's actually not half bad.

"No, I didn't mind the crying," Eve says, chuckling. "I'm getting kind of used to it."

"Oh please," Annalise says, shaking her head. "This is all embarrassing enough."

"You don't have to be embarrassed," Eve says, waving Annalise off as she cuts her waffle. "It's me."

"What does that mean?" Annalise asks, slowly dipping a fry into her milkshake. Eve watches her carefully as she takes a bite and makes an appreciative look. Eve giggles softly before speaking up.

"It means I would like you almost no matter what," she says, smiling. "Even if you do weird things like dip your fries in your milkshake." Annalise starts to protest, but Eve just chuckles.

"It doesn't matter, is what I'm saying. I'm just glad you're eating anyways. I was worried when you weren't."

Annalise's mouth closes as Eve makes this statement. Everything she says is so kind and so sincere that it just makes her have to stop and think. Then she reminds herself not to ever take Eve for granted. And this is the thought that takes up most of the space in her mind for the remaining time that they eat.

By the time they step into Eve's grandmother's house, it's after 12. Eve murmurs a soft shush to Annalise, although she doesn't need it. She doesn't speak as they move through the huge kitchen, or up the seemingly endless stairs, or even as they walk down the impossibly long hall and into the last room on the left. After Eve closes the door behind them, Annalise exhales and finally speaks her mind.

"This house is huge," she says, her voice barely above a whisper. She sets down her suitcase down and looks around the room. It's decorated differently from anything Annalise has seen before, maybe Victorian. The walls are pink.

"My grandfather was a pretty successful businessman," Eve answers nonchalantly.

"Pretty successful," Annalise repeats, scoffing quietly. "Sounds like an understatement." It's fair to say that her house could fit into this one 15 times over. Eve doesn't understand, but how could she possible when this was her life? She just chuckles a bit and shakes her head, running a hand through her hair.

"You can sleep in here," Eve says. " The bathroom is that door right there, and you can put your clothes in the dresser. In the morning, I'll come to you so you don't get lost. My room is right across the hall. I'll be right back."

Eve smiles softly before she slips out. Luckily, the room across from hers had been free. If Eve remembers correctly, there are 6 bedrooms in the house; all of which were now being taken. One by her grandmother, another by her father and stepmother, the next by her brother and his wife, then one by their oldest child, then one by Annalise, and the last by Eve. She hoped everyone was here.

Eve changes her clothes slowly, putting on a pair of shorts and a shirt before tying her hair up. The events of today are starting to take their toll on her, and she wants nothing more than to climb into bed. She slowly walks into the bathroom and brushes her teeth, then washes her face before heading to back to Annalise's room to check in on her and say goodnight.

When Eve steps back into the room, Annalise is already in bed. She looks pretty cute to Eve - in her big t-shirt with her hair wrapped up. Her mood seems to have changed, though. She looks worried.

"You all set? And do you mind if I borrow this?" Eve asks, grabbing the throw from the end of the bed. Annalise takes a small breath and nods. "Well, I'll see you in the morning, okay? If you need anything, call me."

"Can you stay?" Annalise asks just as Eve turns to the door. She turns back to Annalise, surprised. The tone she uses pulls a memory from somewhere in the back of Eve's mind, but she doesn't have the opportunity to dust it off and examine it. "Just for a little while, please." Eve bites her lip and thinks it over for a second before nodding.

"Sure," she says. "Just for a little while."

She sets the throw back down to its previous spot before pulling back the covers on the left side of the bed and climbing in. She lays down on her side, facing Annalise. They're too rigid, not comfortable enough. It doesn't feel right. Annalise glances away and Eve thinks she might be feeling the same way. So she speaks up.

"Um, can I..." she begins, her voice unsteady, "Can I, um..." Annalise looks up, nodding automatically.

"Yes," she breathes softly, sounding relieved. "Please."

This is the second time she's said please in less than a minute. Apparently, she's full of surprises tonight. Eve doesn't tease her, though. Instead, she just wraps her arms around Annalise's waist, pulling her in closer. Annalise's body relaxes slightly under her touch, and in a matter of seconds she's curled up to Eve, her head lying on her chest. She exhales slowly. Eve thinks this is better, but after a little while, she notices that Annalise is shaking.

"Annalise," she says, her voice quiet. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," comes Annalise's voice. It's too soft, too innocent sounding. Not her normal tone, not even the gentle one she uses when she's making an effort to be nice. It's even quieter than that, and it lets Eve know Annalise is lying through her teeth.

"Something is wrong," Eve says. She pulls back so that she can look at Annalise. "You can talk to me,Annalise. What is it? You're shaking; are you scared?"

Annalise assumes that Eve is referring to whatever happened that made Annalise call her. Annalise doesn't want to talk about that, though. She can't; not right now when Eve's arms feel so nice and she's so tired. So she decides to talk about Eve. It's not like she's not already on her mind anyways. She's always on Annalise's mind it seems, even more so in the past few days.

"I'm not scared," she says slowly. Eve waits for her to continue. "I just...can't figure you out." She hadn't meant to admit that really, but the thought is out now and it's not like she can snatch it back.

"What do you mean?"

"I just can't figure out what's wrong with you," Annalise states after opening and closing her mouth multiple times. She notices the look on Eve's face and quickly begins to clarify. "Not what's wrong with you. It's just that...people aren't... perfect...like you. They have flaws. Weaknesses. And that's not bad because everyone has them. No one's flawless. Like, Lisa's nosey and Kim can be naive. And me, well, there's a lot wrong with me...but you...there's nothing wrong with you. You're virtually perfect and I don't understand...how that could be. I mean, people aren't perfect. Not all of them are even good. But you're so...so perfect."

"I am not perfect," Eve immediately says. Honestly, the idea isn't even plausible. She has a pretty realistic view of herself, and she knows the word flawless definitely wouldn't describe her or anyone else that she knew for that matter. "There are things wrong with me

"Not from what I've seen. You're sweet. Caring. You put others before yourself. And you're funny. And nice. Generous. Beautiful, of course..."

"Annalise, those things don't mean I'm perfect. I'm not even sure if I qualify for all of them," Eve says, laughing dryly. "You just see the best in me."

"But I don't do that," Annalise explains, trying to work through it in her own mind. She doesn't sound like herself, and she knows that, but that's because she can't figure out her own thoughts for the life of her. She's the kind of person who has to think before they speak, but now she's trying to do both at once. "I don't see the best in people. I see the worst."

Eve laughs but she shakes her head.

"I'm serious! And that's what so strange. Your worst is everyone else's best and I don't get how that could be."

"Maybe it isn't," Eve says, smirking just slightly. "Maybe your crush on me just affects your ability to judge my character fairly."

Annalise pauses before remembering she said something awfully similar a long time ago on that day they got stuck in the rain. Eve is teasing. She rolls her eyes and scoffs, but Eve continues, smiling now.

"So let's say you do just see the best in me," she says. "What's so wrong with that?" Annalise has to stop to think this question over, and when she answers, each of her words is slow and careful, like she'd hand-picked every one.

"Seeing the worst in people is smart because then you're never surprised. It makes it a lot harder for you to be blindsided. If you see the best in people, it's just like you're asking for them to trick you. It's impossible not to get hurt."

This surprises Eve. Annalise looks like she really believes every word she says, but Eve has never even imagined living with that kind of outlook. She had a habit in believing in people; whether that was good or bad she couldn't decide.

"Is that what you're afraid of?" she asks incredulously. "That I'm going to hurt you?" Things are clicking into place. The way Annalise flinched whenever Eve touched her without announcing it first. How she refused to let herself kiss Eve. She'd been afraid of being hurt.

"Don't act like it's absurd," Annalise starts defensively, but Eve just shakes her head.

"Annalise," she begins sternly. "I am not going to hurt you. I promise I am not going to hurt you. I couldn't imagine it. I mean, I would never...Oh, god if you knew the way I felt about you, you wouldn't even consider the idea-"

Annalise cuts Eve off at this point with a soft kiss. It's gentle and quick and it takes both Annalise and Eve by surprise, but it's perfect. Eve swears she feels electricity jolt through her body and for just that fraction of a second, everything feels right. But Annalise pulls back too soon and Eve doesn't even have the chance to kiss her back.

"I'm sorry," spills out of Annalise's lips. "I shouldn't have." To be honest, she's waiting for the triggers to set in. She's waiting for the flashback and the shaking. But by taking charge, she must have tricked her brain, because nothing comes.

Eve's eyes are lowered, but she quickly raises them to look at Annalise, her lips still parted slightly. She's so beautiful to Annalise.

Eve waits for a beat before speaking.

"Do it again," she whispers.

"What?" asks Annalise.

"Do it again," Eve repeats, her voice a bit louder. "Or I will."

Annalise looks stunned. Eve raises her hands from their spot on her waist to Annalise's face gently. She cups her cheeks in the most impossibly gentle manner. This is reassuring. The gesture is so tender, so gentle. It makes Annalise trust Eve. Eve is trying to help her relax. Annalise is watching her - her eyes, her lips. Eve looks her in the eye for appr oval, and Annalise nods her head ever so slightly. Then Eve lets her eyelids flutter shut, and she presses her lips back to Annalise's. Everything she'd felt, and everything she'd wanted to say in the past 18 weeks she did her best to wrap up in one, slow, perfect, kiss.

Annalise kisses back.


	9. Muffins and Makeout Sessions

**AN is placed at the end!**

Eve has wanted to kiss Annalise for a very long time, and because of that, she had often imagined things like what it would be like and where it would be and who would initiate it. However, even with all of her crushing and pining, she would have never been able to guess that kissing Annalise would feel so right. Her lips are unbelievably soft, and although her technique is tentative, it is also skillful. Part of Eve's mind is telling her to end the kiss now, so she doesn't scare Annalise off, but the other part of her doesn't ever want to stop. So for once, Eve lets her inhibition slide and she moves one of her hands from Annalise's cheek to her waist to pull her closer as she kisses her once more. Annalise returns her kiss again and Eve lets out a small sigh of contentment against her lips.

Surprisingly, Annalise's thoughts are parallel to Eve's. It was true that Annalise hadn't slept with anyone before, but she had kissed a fair amount of people. And in her experience, no one had made her feel as safe and content as Eve was making her feel right now. Annalise didn't mind Eve's hand on her waist, and she loved the feeling of her warm palm on Annalise's cheek. As Eve pulls Annalise closer, Annalise hears her sigh softly. Annalise takes the opportunity to kiss her again, deeper this time. Eve responds immediately, her breath quickening slightly. The kiss isn't particularly desperate or hurried, but not shy either. It's casual and easy and _fun_. Annalise doesn't have to worry about the smell of alcohol or trigger words. For once, she is in control and she can kiss someone she likes without feeling guilty about it or withdrawing. She loves this feeling. Annalise enjoys kissing Eve and when they have to pull back to breathe, she makes a small sound of dismay at the loss of contact. Eve is smiling at her though. It should be hard to tell, with just the light of the lamp on the bedside table, but Annalise knows Eve now and she can almost feel her smile and that lip bite that makes Annalise's stomach flutter.

"I'm sorry," Annalise says quietly as she catches her breath. And then of course, she can almost feel Eve's smile fall.

"For what?"

"For waiting so long to do that."

And then the smile is back. Annalise starts to giggle, but then she feels Eve's smiling mouth on hers, laughing quietly in between her soft kisses.

" _This_ was worth waiting for," Eve whispers, tugging Annalise on top of her. Annalise giggles again and kisses her back again - once, twice. Then they're wrapped up in each other's arms and Annalise realizes that she is so glad Eve came and got her.

* * *

A bit later, Annalise lays with her back to Eve, the brunette's arms wrapped tightly around her waist. Annalise is more comfortable than she has been in months: her lips tender and a bit swollen from the passionate kisses she and Eve had shared, her heart full of hope, and her mind finally at ease. Eventually, she lets her drowsiness take over and her heavy eyelids fall before she can even whisper goodnight. Eve hears her breathing even out, and she realizes Annalise is asleep with a small smile. She leans forward a bit and cranes her neck to kiss Annalise's forehead gently before laying back and exhaling. Physically, her body was exhausted, but her mind was racing. As she closed her eyes, she ran a scene from the previous morning over in her mind.

 _That morning she had woken up later than normal, around 10. When she went downstairs, her family had separated already, as they often did. Eve's family wasn't the type to spend every waking moment together, and so even though they were all staying in the same house, there was no set time for meals or activities. Eve enjoyed the freedom, but she did wish sometimes, although not often, that she could spend time with everyone at once. As she headed into the kitchen, she caught a glimpse out the window of her brother loading his family into their car. Her dad was at the kitchen table with the paper, and she suspected that her grandmother was in the living room knitting or crocheting or something like that._

" _Good morning, Dad," she said casually as she started to prepare a cup of coffee._

" _Good morning, Eve" he responded in a similar tone. Eve hears the rustling of the paper being sat down and she turns to her dad with a small smile. He'd aged since she'd last seen him, but Eve thinks he's still relatively handsome. Simon Rothlo's previously brown hair and beard are now mostly gray, and he has a prominent nose and sunken eyes, just like Eve. He's also thin and tall like her, and he has the same no-nonsense attitude and bright smile. They had always gotten along quite well. Eve misses talking to him. Since she had gotten back, they hadn't gotten much of a chance to speak to each other. It had taken her all day to drive to Knoxville on the first day, and then the second day she'd spent shopping with her stepmother and sister-in-law. But now, they had the opportunity to have a real conversation. So as Eve finishes making her cup of coffee, she sits across from her Dad and looks at him expectantly, a smile on her lips._

" _How is school going?" he asks. He is not the type to ask a lot of unnecessary questions._

" _Well," Eve answers, nodding her head as if she's agreeing with herself. "Very well. I think I'm at the top of my class. My grades are good."_

" _Have you made any friends?"_

" _Yes," Eve answers. She thinks this over as she sips her coffee. She had met nice people in class of course, and she had her own little group of friends, but no one that she had liked as much as Annalise. She smiles a bit as she thinks of Annalise, giving her a present and how she had put her arms around Eve on the couch. Her dad notices her facial expression change and he raises his eyebrows as Eve continues. "One girl in particular is really nice. I like her a lot, I think."_

 _It's strange to say this out loud, to someone else. She of course hadn't hid her feelings from Annalise but it wasn't like she talked a lot to other people about her feelings. She looks at her dad's face and sees that he's surprised. Then she realizes that she's never told her father that she's liked anyone, male or female. She holds her breath a bit now, waiting for his reaction. Finally, he begins to smile a bit._

" _It's about time, isn't it?" he says, and Eve chuckles with him. "Does she like you back?" This question takes more consideration from Eve. She wanted to believe that Annalise liked her. She said she did, Eve thought. They had almost kissed a few times. But Annalise wasn't the easiest person to read. Still, Eve decided to hold on to her optimism._

" _I think so," she says slowly, letting herself smile._

" _Good," her father says, looking back down at his paper. "Maybe by next Christmas, we'll have met her."_

Eve smiles as she remembers this, and then how surprised her dad looked later that evening when she told him she was going to Jasper to get Annalise.

"Well, alright," he said before scrawling down general directions. Eve had been thankful that he didn't ask any questions, because she wouldn't have really have had answers. All she knew was that Annalise had been upset on the phone, and Eve had hated that so she decided to do something about it. In the morning, Annalise would be able to meet her dad. Eve thought he would like her. She strokes Annalise waist gently, causing Annalise to make a small noise and wiggle closer. Eve's smile widens and she takes a second to inhale and bask in how _happy_ she truly is at this moment. She had finally kissed Annalise, who she had been crushing on for months. And it had been a real kiss, uninfluenced by alcohol and initiated by Annalise herself. It had been a good kiss. Eve wanted to do that again every day for the rest of her life. As she slips away into sleep, Eve thinks to herself that Annalise may actually be the person she is meant to be with forever.

* * *

Eve wakes up with Annalise snuggled up to her. It takes her a second to remember where she is, but then she glances down and looks at Annalise's sleeping face. Eve inhales softly as she realizes - not for the time - how beautiful Annalise really is. She's beginning to love all of her little features: her curled eyelashes and smooth skin, her soft baby hairs and toned arms. They had slept in the same bed before but never like this. Eve hadn't ever been able to run her hand over Annalise's cheek or her lips, which were slightly upturned in a small smile. She hadn't ever had the guts to lightly brush her own lips against Annalise's, like she does now. Annalise's eyes flutter as Eve begins to pull away and her smile widens immediately.

"Hey," she says quietly. Annalise smiles back at her. She's waking up a bit more now and remembering everything that had happened yesterday, but she forces herself to push those thoughts to the back of her mind. All she wants to remember is kissing Eve and smiling at her in the dark. She wants to lie here forever and never have to worry about anything else. But she knows that the second she responds, the moment will be over. So instead of saying good morning, she leans in and kisses Eve again, relishing the feeling of Eve's gentle lips on her own.

Eve is surprised when Annalise kisses her, but she kisses back automatically anyways. She had half-expected Annalise to want to pretend like their first kiss had never happened. She was prepared to agree to forget all about it and continue as friends. However, if she didn't have to, she'd be happier than ever. When Annalise pulls back, Eve gives her a shy smile.

"I've wanted to do that for a long time," she admits quietly. She casts her eyes down bashfully before suddenly realizing that she hadn't had a chance to brush her teeth yet. "Oh god, is my breath awful?"

Annalise laughs at this and shakes her head quickly. Eve had surprised her.

"No, not at all," she says, grinning in spite of her nerves. "I'd tell you if it was; believe me." Eve giggles softly. A second later, she speaks up again.

"I still feel like I have to go brush my teeth," she admits quietly and Annalise playfully rolls her eyes.

"I know," she answers.

"I'll be right back after I shower and everything," Eve says, standing up. She leans over and pecks Annalise's cheek quickly before heading out of the room. As she steps into the hallway, then her own room, she can't help but let an impossibly wide smile spread across her face. She can't stop thinking about kissing Annalise and holding Annalise and waking up with her. She knew they would have to talk about it all later. They would have to work out "what they were" and she expected Annalise to worry a lot, but none of that mattered right now. All that mattered was that for just a few minutes, or hours maybe, Eve could pretend that Annalise was hers, and that was really what she wanted. For Annalise to be hers.

As she hops in the shower, Eve thinks all about places she wants to take Annalise to. She wants to show her around and introduce her to her family. She wanted to make her smile like she had before. So in her mind, she quickly decides to make these 4 weeks the best vacation ever.

Eve showers quickly and then gets ready in a surprisingly short amount of time. This is because as she gets dressed in a cropped t-shirt and loose fitting jeans, all she can think about is Annalise. After brushing through her hair and pinning it back, she headed across the hall and knocked on Annalise's door.

"Come in," Annalise answers, and Eve steps in. She plops down onto the bed, causing Annalise to bounce slightly. She looks like a doll in a black dress with a white tee underneath and Mary Janes on her feet. She smiles a little as Eve wiggles up to her.

"Hey," Eve says coyly and Annalise rolls her eyes, setting down the chapstick she'd been holding.

"Hey," she answers, her voice soft. "You got ready quickly."

"Well so did you," Eve points out. Annalise shrugs.

"I always get ready quickly. You don't." Eve sticks her tongue out at Annalise's gentle teasing before shrugging sheepishly.

"I didn't want to be away from you for too long," Eve admits, biting her bottom lip before smiling. Annalise's face softens and she purses her lips together.

"Eve," she complains softly, but she leans in slightly. Eve grins and cups Annalise's cheek gently before leaning in and kissing her softly. She doesn't know if she'll ever be able to kiss Annalise without feeling her stomach flutter like this. Annalise kisses back immediately, moving in closer to Eve, and Eve sighs happily and kisses her again. Eventually, she adjusts herself so that her legs are draped over Annalise's comfortably and she can kiss Annalise a bit more passionately. Their kisses increase in intensity rapidly, just as they had the night before, and before Eve realizes what she's doing, she's kissing over Annalise's jaw, then the base of her ear before returning to her lips again. Her heart is racing as memories from drunken almost kisses and close dancing run through her mind and she realizes with a start that she _wants_ Annalise so badly. After waiting so long for just a kiss, Eve would expect that she would be content after getting one, but now all of a sudden she wants _all_ of Annalise. She wants kissing and sex, she wants a relationship and laughing. She wants working out together and staying up late for classroom assignments. She wants to be with her because this feeling that she has right now that her heart might just leap out of her chest is incredible. She had always known that she wanted to be more than just friends, but the feeling in her stomach made her wonder if there was even more to it than that.

Just as Eve realizes this, there is a knock at the door. She and Annalise immediately jump apart and Eve wipes her mouth before standing.

"One second," she calls, pulling her jeans up a bit and heading to the door.

"Eve?" calls her stepmother. "I just wanted to let you know that I made muffins. There are some downstairs if you want any. Tell your friend too."

"Alright," Eve answers, surprised that she's referring to Annalise. Her dad must have told her last night. "Thanks."

She hears Deborah walk away and she turns back to Annalise with a small smile.

"You hungry?"

"For muffins? Always," Annalise answers, smiling. She stands up and stretches, and Eve finds herself running her eyes over her legs. She internally scolds herself as Annalise walks over to her, casting her eyes down. "Eve?"

Eve looks back up and Annalise leans up and presses her lips against her own. Eve almost melts as Annalise kisses her slowly, her hands on Eve's waist. When she pulls back, Eve has to take a breath to calm herself down.

"What was that for?" she asks softly, wrapping her arms around Annalise and pulling her to her.

"Just because," Annalise says quietly, eyes sparkling. Eve has never seen her act like this before. She seems so confident and relaxed. Eve doesn't spend much time wondering why because she immediately smiles and pulls Annalise even closer, kissing her again hungrily. Again, there's a little nagging voice in the back of her head that tells her to tone it down, but then Annalise wraps her arms around Eve's neck and kisses her back with such fever that her mind clears.

As they kiss, Annalise steps forward so that Eve is pressed against the wall. Eve has to bite down on Annalise lip to keep from moaning at the sudden power shift. Annalise doesn't seem to mind, and only kisses Eve more deeply, letting one of her hands run over Eve's arm. Eve hands on Annalise's waist begin to roam, and eventually, she lightly touches her chest, causing Annalise to jump back suddenly. She's breathing hard, her eyes wide, and she looks a bit startled.

"Sorry," Eve whispers immediately, letting her go. She's kicking herself for moving so fast and causing Annalise to pull away. Even though it's only been a few seconds, she already misses the feeling of Annalise's body against hers and the gentle pressure of her lips. Annalise's eyes lower so that Eve can't tell what she's thinking and Eve reaches out and squeezes her hand softly to calm her.

"You ready to head downstairs?" she asks, graciously giving Annalise an out. Annalise raises her head a bit and nods, offering Eve a small smile.

"Yeah," she says. "I'm pretty hungry." As she says this, her stomach growls audibly. Eve hears this and giggles, and Annalise laughs as well, breaking the tension. Eve doesn't let go of Annalise's hand as she opens the door, and heads out down the hallway. Together, they walk down the back stairs. Eve had always loved this house when she was smaller. It was a large colonial style home, with lots of land and older decorations. Whenever she visited, she could explore and spend the entire day outside if she wanted. She had a lot of good memories here. She glances at Annalise with a small smile as she realizes that she was still making memories, even now.

When the step into the kitchen, Eve notices that her father is at the table with her stepmom, and so she drops Annalise's hand so that she doesn't embarrass her.

"Good morning," she says, making her dad look up. He smiles a bit when he sees Eve and Annalise and stands. "Dad, this is Annalise. Annalise this is my father Simon, and my stepmom Deborah.

"It's nice to meet you, Annalise," her dad says, holding out his hand for Annalise to shake, which she does. "Eve has told us a lot about you."

"It's nice to meet you too," Annalise answers, a hint of a smile on her lips. Eve thinks she sees Annalise's cheeks flush a bit, and she begins to explain what exactly she'd been telling her dad, but then she hears the front door slam and her brother's voice. Soon enough, he steps in with his wife and two kids. Eve gives him a quick hug.

"This is Michael," she says to Annalise. "He's my older brother. Michael this is Annalise."

"Hi," he says, smiling widely, shifting his son to his left arm so that he can shake Annalise's hand. "This is my wife Kirsten, my daughter Emily, and our youngest is Michael Jr." By this time, Emily has found her way over to Eve, and is begging for her to pick her up and so Eve complies. Emily is 4 years old and Eve absolutely adores her. She has her mom's blonde curls, but her nose looks a bit like Eve's, at least in her opinion.

"Nice to meet you, Annalise," Kirsten says, going in for a hug. She is _that_ type of mom, the one who bakes and hugs everyone and throws amazing parties for her kids. She is impossibly warm, but Eve knows that is not Annalise's style. Eve notices that she stiffens a bit initially, but she does hug Kirsten back, and the smile stays on her face.

"It's nice to meet you too," Annalise says, looking like she's beginning to relax a little bit.

"So did you all want muffins?" Deborah asks, speaking up for the first time. She is on the quieter side, but not impolite, and so she offers one to Annalise first. Annalise takes it with a smile and a thank you, and then Eve nabs one as well.

"So where's Nana at?" Eve asks, shifting Emily on her hip so that she can take a bite of her muffin. She makes a muffled sound of approval as she chews, which Annalise repeats as she takes a bite as well. Eve grins at her, winking.

"You got up late," Michael answers, passing Michael Jr. to his wife. "She's already taking her midday nap. We probably won't see her until dinner."

"We just stopped back by the house to set the kids down for a nap. But if you wanted to go out, we could all go downtown after," Kirsten offers. Eve nudges Annalise gently, raising an eyebrow. Annalise smiles and nods slightly and Eve turns back to Kirsten.

"Yeah, sure," she says. "I can put Emily in her room, if you'd like."

"That'd be great," Michael answers, his mouth full of muffin. Kirsten rolls her eyes.

"Thank you," she says, taking a seat next to Eve's father.

"Want to help?" Eve asks Annalise. Annalise nods through another bite of muffin, and Eve grins as she starts to head upstairs. Annalise follows after her slowly, and together they step into one of the first bedrooms on the hall.

"This is so good," Annalise murmurs as they enter the room. Eve laughs softly.

"I know," she answers, nodding a bit. "My mom could never really cook, but Deborah is amazing at it."

Annalise tilts her head, and Eve's cheeks flush as she realizes she's said more than necessary. She brushes it off by setting her muffin down before sitting on the edge of the bed, Emily in her lap. Annalise sits next to her.

"Are you ready for your nap?" she asks Emily, who shakes her head immediately.

"No Auntie," she whines. "I'm not sleepy." Eve smirks as Emily rubs her eyes after this statement.

"Sure," she says. Emily looks up now at Annalise, just appearing to notice her.

"What's your name?" she asks, crawling out of Eve's lap to sit between her and Annalise, who is still nibbling on a muffin.

"Annalise," she answers, looking a bit uncomfortable. Eve had suspected that she wasn't much of a kid person and she seemed to be right.

"Annie," Emily tries. Annalise starts to correct her but Eve giggles.

"That's good, Emily," she says, trying to hide her smile. "Annie." Emily smiles, looking proud. She climbs into Annalise's lap now, oblivious to Annalise's surprise. With her small hand, she fiddled with one of Annalise's cornrows.

"I want this hair," Emily pouts. Eve chuckles and Annalise finally cracks a smile. "I like braids."

"Your hair is pretty already," Annalise says, overcoming her surprise. "You have nice curls."

"Thank you," Emily answers, making an obvious attempt to be polite. Eve holds back another giggle. "I got my hair from my Mommy. And my eyes from my Daddy. But I got my nose from Auntie."

"Okay okay," Eve says, rolling her eyes slightly. "Come here, you've got to lay down."

Emily crawls back to Eve's lap, although she's pouting.

"But Auntie," she starts and Eve nods, standing up and pulling the cover back at bit before laying Emily down. "I'm not sleepy. Not even a little bit."

"Can you just try to relax then?" Eve asks gently, smoothing Emily's curls down. "Just close your eyes." Emily huffs.

"Okay," she says, shutting her eyes tightly. Annalise raises an eyebrow as she stands up carefully. Eve mouths 'wait' before pointing at Emily. Slowly, her eyes relax. Then, in less than a minute she snores. Eve grins and grabs her muffin before tiptoeing out of the room with Annalise.

"Works every time," she says, grinning after they shut the door.

"Annie?" Annalise says, raising her eyebrows.

"I kind of like it," Eve muses. Annalise glares at her. "What?"

* * *

Shopping with Kirsten was fun. Eve had been a little worried about things being awkward, but everything had been absolutely fine. Kirsten was a friendly person, and after just a few seconds in the car, she had Annalise smiling. They'd gone to a few thrift stores and boutiques downtown, and helped Kirsten pick out a few extra toys for the kids. When Eve let her that Emily seemed to like Annalise, Annalise had blushed a bit and Kirsten smiled.

Now, they were setting the table for dinner. Eve was folding napkins while Annalise set out the silverware.

"Ready for dinner?" Eve asks, a small smile on her face.

"I'm a little nervous," Annalise admits, finishing the last place setting and sitting next to Eve, who smiles comfortingly.

"Why?" she asks. "You've already met everyone."

"Except your grandmother," Annalise says, playing with the hem of her dress. Eve tilts her head. She had been wanting to kiss Annalise all day, but she hadn't been given much an opportunity to do so. Besides, after this morning, she wasn't really sure if Annalise would even want her to. "What if she doesn't like me?"

"She will, Annalise," Eve assures. Eve's grandmother is 85 and Dutch. When Eve was a child, she seemed impossibly tall and beautiful. She's shrunk a bit now, but she still seems just as wise and graceful as she always had., She speaks in broken English with an accent, but just like Kirsten, she is impossibly warm. She loves kids, and Eve secretly hopes that one day she'll get to give her great-grandchildren just like her brother did. She has no doubt that she's going to love Annalise, just because she's her friend.

"We'll see," Annalise answers, her nervousness evident in her voice. Eve finishes her last napkin before reaching over and squeezing Annalise's hand reassuringly.

"You'll be great," she assures, smiling softly. Annalise takes a breath before nodding gently.

"Thanks."

* * *

Dinner is a massive success.

Not that Eve had been worried or anything. But she had seen Annalise's nerves, and the way she shifted at the table. Her brother must have noticed too, because right after everyone had food on their plates, he spoke up.

"So Annalise, what do you want to do with your law degree?" he asks, spooning a small portion of mashed potatoes into Michael Jr.'s mouth.

"I'd like to have my own practice," Annalise answers automatically. Eve knew this was something she'd thought through already, so she didn't have to worry about her answer. "Hopefully I'll be able to stay up north. It's nice up there, I never saw snow before I went to Boston."

Everyone had chuckled at this. Eve's grandmother had looked over at Annalise after this from her spot at the head of the table and smiles.

"Simon tells me Eve adores you," she says, making Eve's cheeks blush. "You met at Harvard?"

"Yes," Annalise says, flicking her eyes at Eve quickly, a small smile on her face. Eve knows she is going to be teased later on about the word 'adore'. "She sat next to me in our first class."

"That's not the entire story," Eve adds, before beginning to help Emily cut her chicken up. She had insisted on sitting between her and "Annie".

"It's not?" Annalise asks, raising her eyebrows. Eve grins.

"I did sit next to her. And then I witnessed her throw a pen at a boy in the row in front of us."

"That was an accident!" Annalise protests. Eve's family laughs.

"Hardly," Eve says slyly, grinning down at Emily's plate. "But because I'm a nice person, I offered her an extra pen."

"That's the whole story then," Annalise says, but Eve shakes her head.

"Not yet," she muses. Annalise frowns a bit, and Eve can tell she's racking her brain for what happened next. "Most of the students have all of their classes together. So on the way over to our next class, Annalise turns around and asks me if I'm following her." Eve's family chuckles again, together now. Annalise's cheeks match Eve's now.

"I didn't know-"

"You thought I was obsessed with you."

"I did not!"

"Anyways," Eve continues, passing Emily her fork. "After that, I had to work to be her friend. She wasn't always the friendliest."

"You're not being fair," Annalise insists, but when Eve looks up at her, her eyes are sparkling. Eve offers her a crooked smile and out of habit, she bites her lip slightly. Out of the corner of her eye, she sees her brother nudge her dad but she doesn't care. This feels right, having Annalise at the table with her family and being able to joke like this. Things fall quiet for a second. It's her grandmother who breaks the silence

" _Liefdesverdriet,_ " she murmurs and Eve's father makes a noise of agreement. Eve glances at him to see that he's grinning.

"I'm going to have to side with Annalise here," Kirsten adds, bringing the conversation back. "She's been so nice all day, and I think Michael's told some stories where Eve wasn't exactly the kindest."

Then dinner turns into an embarrassing stories about Eve party, and everything she's ever done that puts her in a bad light is fair game. She groans a lot, but she doesn't really mind the stories because she loves it when Annalise laughs.

By the time dinner is over and everyone is heading up to bed, Eve's cheeks hurt from smiling so much. She walks Annalise to her room of course.

"Today was fun," she says, grinning. Annalise nods a bit, smiling widely.

"Thank you," she says softly. "For bringing me here. Your family is great."

"I'm really glad you're here," Eve admits. She can't wait until tomorrow, which is Christmas Eve.

"Me too," Annalise says gently. Eve bites her lip again before looking towards her room across the hall.

"I guess I should get to bed," she says slowly. "I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night," Annalise says. Eve smiles.

"Good night."

Then she heads into her room. The only problem is that she can't fall asleep. She takes a shower, gets a glass of water, and reads, but no matter what, she can't get Annalise off her mind. Last night, she'd been to hold her and kiss her as much as she wanted and she was missing that desperately.

After 2 hours of being awake, she gets up and decides to see if Annalise is awake. So she gets up and goes to her door, but when she opens it, Annaise is standing there, fumbling with her hands.

"I couldn't fall asleep," she offers as an explanation when Eve's eyebrows raise. "Can I sleep with you?"

"Of course," Eve answers, stepping back to let Annalise in. After she close the door, they climb into bed together and Annalise snuggles up to Eve.

Eve smiles softly as she looks at Annalise, or at least, at the outline of Annalise's face in the dim light of the lamp near her bed. She slips one arm around her and uses the other hand to stroke her cheek gently. Then finally, Annalise leans in a bit and Eve is able to kiss her gently and slowly.

"My Annie," she whispers softly, a bit of tease in her voice. Annalise scoffs softly.

"Hush," she says, but she leans in and kisses Eve again. When they pull away, Eve is just able to make out the outline of her smile.

 **AN: Alright so this note is at the end because it's a bit longer and it involves some explanations that I think are pretty important, but I don't want anyone to feel like they have to read them. First of all, I'd like to say that I really appreciate every** _ **single**_ **review. I love how much detail every person puts into their reviews. Everytime I see a little paragraph, I just feel so fulfilled. What I really want you guys to know that I'm just as invested as you all are; you're my inspiration!**

 **Alright so, this is addressed to the guest that commented that they objected to the term 'niggerish' used in Chapter 1. I'd like to start off by saying that I am honestly sorry the term bothered you, and I hope you can still enjoy the story despite that. When I was writing the first chapter, I honestly didn't think much about the word or it's usage. This isn't because the term doesn't bother me, but simply because in my own experience, I've realized that some black people don't mind using the term, while others do. I personally never felt comfortable using 'the n-word' in my daily speech, but I don't think less of the members of my race who do. When characterizing Lisa, I felt like she was the kind of person who wouldn't let anyone dictate what words she could or couldn't use. I see her as an empowered character and so I chose to have her say that because I feel like in her mind, she would have the right to use the term niggerish however she wants. I don't think that her saying this would make her any less intelligent or enlightened. I don't mean to defend or argue against the modern use of the term 'nigger' and its variations, but I did use it in this story to attempt to paint a complete picture of my characters and their situation.**

 **As always, thank you for reading. Please continue to review!**


	10. Subconscious Thoughts and Floral Sheets

**AN: So this is really a just a short, filler chapter. It's meant to kind of be a string of dreams in Annalise's mind. It's styled kind of differently, but I actually really like it and I hope you all do too. There's mention of the incident with her uncle, so be prepared for that. Please read and review as always!**

A memory.

 _Laughing on a big old porch. Her old house before it had burned down and they'd had to move into a little cramped space. Jumping rope with her sisters. Sunshine and giggling. Lemonade and shortbread cookies. Chocolate skin glowing as if it had been kissed by God himself._

A memory.

 _A teenage Anna Mae, maybe 16._

" _What's so good about kissing anyways?" she had asked her youngest sister one night while she combed through her hair. This seemed backwards. She was supposed to be giving the advice, but instead it was always the other way around._

" _It's not just the kiss," Mary answered, rolling her eyes. She'd later tell Annalise that contrary to what it seemed like, she had been secretly thrilled that Annalise was asking her for advice. "It's about the way you feel about the person you're kissing. Like if you love them, then the kiss is amazing. It's like this feeling that you can't breathe and that makes your heart swell until it feels like it's gonna burst out of your chest. It's like, it's like -"_

 _Annalise knew now. It was like floating on still waters. It was like making a mistake and being giggled at, but kissed anyways. It was like running down the stairs and finding presents under the tree after someone had told you there would never be presents, not this Christmas, or on any Christmas after. It was late night driving and neon open 24 hours signs. It was like sitting at a dinner table and fitting in. It was like snickerdoodle cookies and wine served in plastic cups. It was like shopping downtown in dusty thrift stores. Like the comfortable feeling of arms around Annalise's waist at night. It was smiles that could be seen in the dark. It was like red lipstick and warm brown eyes. It was like dancing and fitting together like puzzle pieces. It was like flying and falling all wrapped into one._

A memory.

" _Anna Mae you're just laying there. It's like making out with a post," Beau complained. They had been kissing in his room for a while. They'd gone on a couple of dates, but they'd never gotten this far, with both of their shirts thrown to the side. "You gotta move or make some noise or something._

" _Okay," Annalise - or Anna Mae - answered, but she didn't move. She'd been frozen since Beau's lips had hit her neck. He looked at her, compassion suddenly flooding his eyes._

" _Anna Mae, do you wanna do this?"_

 _She had looked up at him and inhaled slowly._

" _No," she answered. This was almost social suicide. When her sisters found out she had turned down one of the cutest boys in school, they'd bother her for months about it. He tossed her shirt at her._

" _Go home then." These words aren't harsh, more joking. This had been a blessing to Anna Mae, who had never known before this that saying 'no' meant something._

A memory.

 _An older girl, known as Annalise to her new friends, but Anna Mae to her family. She sat in the library, pouring over the slim picking of the works of Freud that her college had to offer. The words_ disassociation _and_ trigger _as well as_ repression _floating around in her mind. Words that were unknown and familiar at the same time. Like they had known who she was even before she knew they existed._

A memory. Often repressed.

 _It was the night after her 11th birthday. Anna Mae had a room all to herself for the first time in her life. Her sisters had whined and complained about her mother's decision to let her move into the big room, but Ophelia had stood firm._

" _She's the oldest," she'd said. "She deserves it more than anyone else. She's a big girl now. Ya'll can get your own rooms soon as you start doing your chores without having to be reminded."_

 _Anna Mae had been so excited to sleep in a room by herself, but she had started to realize that it was a little scary. She was used to her sisters' chatter and the sound of her mother snoring across the hall. Now she was on the first floor all by herself except for her uncle down the hall._

 _There was a knock on her door then. Her uncle had stepped into her room. He was a tall man, round and usually quiet, except for when he was drunk. He shuffled over to Anna Mae's bed and plopped down. Judging by the smell of alcohol surrounding him, that was the case right now._

" _So you're a big girl now. Mae," he said. Anna Mae had hesitated before responding. She never really talked all that much to her uncle, even though they lived in the same house. Her mama said that she'd been scared of him when she was small._

" _I guess so," she said. "I don't feel 11 yet."_

" _You don't look 11," her uncle said after a pause. "You look older. You're almost a woman now."_

 _As he talked his hairy fingers had started crawling towards her. He shifted close to her on the bed until he was touching her, his hand on her skinny thigh. She must have looked scared, because he spoke up again._

" _It's okay, Anna Mae," he said. "It's okay." He touches her cheek, and she flinches. Then she freezes. She lets him touch her with his hands and mouth. She lets him force his way into her pajama bottoms. She lets him rape her._

 _After it was over, she'd just laid there as he zipped his pants. A warm, sticky goo covered her thighs. She remembers feeling like she can't even breathe._

" _Change your sheets," he said. "Hear me? You change your sheets before your Mama comes in here. You done a bad thing Mae, and if she finds out you're gonna get the whooping of your life. You hear me, girl? Change those sheets."_

 _Anna Mae had changed the sheets after he left. She couldn't move until the sun started to rise, and then she had panicked and tried to move fast, but she couldn't because of the ache between her legs. She remembers seeing her own blood on the floral sheets and then when she'd looked down, it was on her pajamas as well. She'd changed her clothes and crumpled everything up and shoved it all into the washer with detergent and then made her bed and gotten back in it before anyone else was even up._

 _That was the first time._

A memory.

 _A teacher's meeting. Anna Mae had sat outside her door, but she could hear her mother's voice raising in the room._

" _What do you mean she ain't been doing well? Her report card don't have anything less than a B."_

" _She's not working to her full potential," her teacher tried. "She was making all A's. She associated with the other students. She just sits at her desk now, does her work, won't talk to anyone. At recess, she doesn't jump rope anymore. Something changed her."_

" _What's that supposed to mean?"_

 _More arguing. In a few minutes, Ophelia was marching out of the school with Anna Mae. She glanced at her daughter, trying to see if there was something that she had missed, something that had changed._

 _She followed Anna Mae's eyes to floral sheet hanging on a clothesline. Saw tears form._

A memory.

 _His funeral. A church with scattered members and sparsely filled pews. No casket because there hadn't been enough money. An urn filled with ashes that seemed to be the center of the universe. Anna Mae's first smile in almost a year._

A memory.

 _It was prom night and warm outside. Too warm. Anna Mae's date had walked her home and insisted on being let in, and now they were sitting on the couch, her brown skin glistening with sweat. He'd leaned in for a kiss and she's complied, but it became more too quickly. He'd started to force himself on top of Anna Mae and she'd squeaked in protest._

" _Stop," she'd muttered. "Get off of me Thomas. Get off." She'd pushed him and he'd sighed, looking angry._

" _You can't just tease me and expect for nothing to happen tonight," Thomas said. "I'm a good guy. I bought your dinner and your corsage. I ain't spend 30 bucks for nothing."_

 _He'd leaned in again. Annalise had struggled with him until she'd hit his nose on accident._

" _I'm bleeding," he said, leaning back, cradling his nose. "Oh god, I'm bleeding. You're crazy Anna Mae, you know that? You're damn crazy and you're never going to get a husband." Anna Mae had stood up._

" _I think you should go."_

A memory.

 _Screaming on Eve's bathroom floor. Tastefully decorated tiles._

A memory.

 _Kissing Eve in Tennessee. Light filtering in through the blinds, giggling and mused hair, lip biting and shirt tugging. Mile long legs draped over her waist. A giggling Eve, unable to stop smiling. A glance of herself in the mirror, the same goofy smile on Annalise's face._

A memory.

 _Clapping in church and feeling lost. Deciding to reinvent herself._

A dream.

 _Eve lies next to Annalise in bed, still but not asleep. She strokes Annalise's hair softly and nuzzles her neck._

" _I love you," she mutters. Annalise's voice responds._

" _I love you, too."_


	11. Hot Chocolate and Holidays

**AN: I don't have much to say on this chapter, just that I still appreciate everyone's support. Please continue to read and review!**

Christmas Eve. Annalise wakes up gasping, bathed in a cold sweat. She sits up abruptly and inhales a few times before wiping her face. The highlights of quickly fleeting dreams run through her mind, but only for a minute before they escape her memory. She takes another breath, slower this time, only calming down when Eve stirs next to her and she can take the time to remember that she is with her, not alone.

Yesterday was good. Annalise had struggled a little bit at first not to think of her mother in Jasper, and her brother and sisters, but as soon as she'd met Eve's family, it had become incredibly easy to live in the moment. Eve is lucky. Her family is warm and welcoming, even to Annalise, who had felt like a black sheep with her cornrows and dark skin at a table full of fair skinned and impossibly tall people. She had been so afraid to stand out, and to interrupt Eve's family's normal life. However, it hadn't been hard at all to talk to anyone. She had heard story after story about Eve as a child and laughed at every one of them. However, the highlight of her visit so far was Eve herself. She had always been amazing but in the last few days she had turned into Wonder Woman. She did sweet things and said the right thing at all the right times and _oh, god_ did she know how to kiss. Annalise has never been able to kiss anyone so many times without having to worry about freezing up or freaking out. She had also never really even wanted to kiss someone so many times. The analytical side of her mind wanted to find out what was different and understand why things were finally connecting in her brain, but she was also afraid of jinxing herself and breaking whatever spell Eve had cast over her brain. So instead, she decides not to think at all about the reasons why, but instead just to enjoy these four weeks as much as she could. Luckily for her, that meant kissing Eve as much as she wanted to.

Eve turns over in her sleep and Annalise exhales softly, running her eyes over Eve's delicate features. Her hair is longer than it was at the beginning of the school year, and now it falls a little past her shoulders, long enough for her to pull back into a ponytail. Her eyes were closed now, but Annalise can picture the bright brown color in her mind. She is beautiful, gorgeous even. It didn't make the least bit of sense for her to be interested in Annalise, but for some reason she was. Annalise glances down at her partly open lips and sighs gently as she remembers kissing them last night.

 _My Annie._ Annalise's heart had leapt at this. While she wasn't initially nuts about the nickname Annie, hearing Eve whisper it to her in the middle of the night had made her awfully fond of it. Maybe it was a little more of the 'my' that made her excited though. The thought of being Eve's made a shiver run through Annalise's body. Eve was everything anyone could ever want: kind, thoughtful, gorgeous. Annalise stops herself here, because she's starting feel her heartbeat quicken. This is exactly what she's not supposed to be thinking of. So she takes another breath, although she does let herself push a lock of Eve's hair back gently. Then she slips out of bed quietly, and heads downstairs to get a glass of water.

When Annalise gets down to the kitchen, she sees that the light is already on. Then she sees Eve's stepmom, standing at the counter, making herself a cup of tea.

"Annalise," she says, adding a tea bag to her mug. "You're up early."

"I just wanted a glass of water," Annalise explains quietly. Deborah nods and leans up grabs a glass for Annalise, passing it to. Annalise smiles gratefully. "Thank you."

"So," Deborah says as Annalise fills her cup under the sink. "You and Eve."

"What do you mean?" Annalise asks, a little confused. She takes a small sip of water. Deborah looks at her before shrugging slightly, stirring her tea.

"I'm not exactly sure," she says carefully. "She just seems so happy to have you here. I mean, like last night at dinner. I've never seen her so animated. She didn't stop smiling for a second. Of course, I missed her childhood, so I'm not exactly sure how she acted before."

"Before?" Annalise questions, tilting her head.

"Before the accident," Deborah says frowning. Annalise is confused, but she doesn't want to ask too many questions. She'd rather talk to Eve herself. "She's never brought home anyone before though, I know that."

"We're not technically," Annalise tries. "I mean, we're not really together." It's weird to say it out loud, for some reason. The words don't seem true even though Annalise knows they are.

"Oh?" Deborah asks, seeming genuinely surprised. She frowns slightly, as if she can't understand Annalise's statement. "Well then this is rather embarrassing for both of us, isn't it?"

Annalise laughs a bit nervously. She can't help but wonder what Deborah had been talking about the. The accident. As she finishes her glass of water, she decides to ask Eve when she goes downstairs.

"I guess I'll see you for breakfast then?" Deborah says. "I'm making biscuits this morning."

"That sounds great," Annalise answers, offering Deborah a final smile before she heads back up the stairs. She goes into her room first, where she washes her face and brushes her teeth before hopping in the shower quickly, trying to get the sticky sweat residue off of herself. As she dries her face, she runs her hands over her wispy eyebrows with a frown before taking a breath. That was another thing about Eve. Annalise had never thought of herself as pretty growing up. After puberty, her body evened out and boys took an interest in her, but she had always hated her hair and her lack of eyebrows and her nose. When she was with Eve though, she looked at her like she was the most beautiful person in the world. Maybe it was selfish, but Annalise liked being able to feel beautiful, even if it was only for a second after she caught Eve staring at her. She frowns, trying to push the thoughts out of her mind as she leaves the bathroom to get dressed. When she steps back into Eve's room, Eve is awake, stepping out of the bathroom.

"There you are," she says happily before she sits back down on the bed. "I was wondering where you went."

"Just downstairs to get a glass of water," Annalise answers, climbing back into bed. Eve stretches out and leans on her elbow as she looks at Annalise, one of those shy smiles on her face. Annalise hopes she doesn't make it disappear with her next question. "I have something to ask you."

"Alright," Eve says, raising her eyebrows in anticipation.

"I ran into your stepmom downstairs," Annalise starts slowly. "We were talking, and she mentioned something about an accident. In your childhood maybe?"

Annalise has to watch Eve's smile fall, and it makes her insides twist. She immediately wants to take her words back.

"Oh."

"You don't have to tell me about it," Annalise says quickly. "I'm sorry for asking."

"No, it's okay," Eve says, shaking her head slightly. She tugs at the gold chain on her neck, which Annalise has noticed that she never takes off. "Um, I guess I just don't know where to start."

She sits up a bit, and Annalise does the same, watching her carefully.

"My parents got divorced when I was really little, so I never really saw my mom that much," Eve says slowly, chewing her bottom lip. "She got real depressed somewhere along the way. She drank a lot, so my dad got full custody. One day, when I was 13, we got a call. She got into a really bad car accident and passed away. And that was that."

"I'm so sorry," Annalise says automatically. Eve's eyes are a bit red now and she sniffs, but shakes her head.

"I mean, she was kind of a shit mom anyways," Eve says, attempting to shrug it off, but failing. "She was always drunk whenever I visited. It just messed me up for a little while after because I felt like I should have been able to stop it. You know, like told her sign up for AA or something, I don't know."

"No," Annalise says, tilting her head. "No, Eve, that wasn't your fault." She is not as good as comforting people as Eve is, but she knows that if the situation was flipped, Eve would hug her and so that's what she does. She slips her arms around Eve and places her head on her shoulder gently.

"I just-" Eve starts, but her voice cracks.

"Not your fault," Annalise murmurs. Eve exhales shakily and Annalise looks up. She's wiped any tears away, but her eyes are still a bit puffy. And then because Annalise doesn't know what else to do, she leans up and pecks Eve's lips. Eve kisses back softly, letting Annalise's proximity comfort her. When Annalise pulls away, Eve is able to smile again.

"You're good at that," she says softly, making Annalise tilt her head her head up to look at her.

"Good at what?"

"Making me feel better."

Eve smile widens after this, and Annalise can't help but smile back. It is so hard not to smile when she is around her.

"Your stepmom said something else, too," Annalise adds.

"Yeah?" Eve asks, glancing at Annalise's lips. "What was that?"

"That you've never brought anyone home before," Annalise says, running her hand over Eve's. "Is that true?"

Eve shrugs, although her cheeks are a bit pink.

"Well yeah," she says, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear.

"Why not?" Annalise asks curiously. Eve shrugs again slightly, but it looks like she searching for an explanation. She tugs lightly on a lock of her hair.

"I mean, I've dated people of course. I've had flings. But I never met anyone I wanted to meet my family," she says, lowering her eyes. Then she corrects herself. "Well, until you."

"Until me?"

"Yes."

Annalise looks at Eve for a second, her eyebrows knit together.

"You mean that?"

"Yes."

Annalise looks down at the bedspread and inhales, thinking about the meaning of Eve's statement. If she had wanted her to meet her family, she was expecting Annalise to stick around for awhile. It meant that she thought about them actually being together. The idea gives her butterflies in her stomach.

"I didn't mean to scare you," Eve says, misinterpreting Annalise's quietness as rejection. "I just meant-"

Annalise cuts Eve off by kissing her. After recovering from her surprise, Eve gently cups Annalise's cheeks and kisses her back. Annalise lets her body melt into Eve's as they kiss. She feels lighter than air, like she could walk on water, like if Eve let her go she would just float right up into the sky like a balloon.

She had wanted to kiss Eve for such a long time, but she had never imagined that making that leap would result in such a good thing. She didn't know that every kiss would make her invincible or every soft confession would suddenly become infinitely important. Annalise wiggles into Eve's lap now to get closer, and she can feel her heart swelling so much that it feels like it's about to burst right through her rib cage. Eve lays back slowly and their kiss begins to change tone. Sweet and leisurely turns into desperate and needy. This is when Annalise starts to feel something that she can't place, something she'd never experienced, like a warm feeling spreading throughout the pit of her stomach. It made her a bit uncomfortable, and even though she loved kissing Eve, she had to pull back to take a breath. It's a quick break though, and then they're kissing all over again because she can't seem to help herself. Eve is struggling to keep her hands still. Annalise can tell because she keeps running her hands down to Annalise's waist, then back to her face. Her skin tingles slightly and she wiggles even closer.

"It's alright," she hears herself say quietly, and Eve lets out a shaky sound that sends a shiver down Annalise's spine. Slowly, her hands slide back down to Annalise's waist and under the material of her t-shirt. Annalise shivers slightly and Eve pauses before giggling nervously. She kisses Annalise's cheek softly, then little spots on her neck slowly. Annalise's eyes flutter open for a second and she runs a hand through Eve's hair, inhaling sharply. Everything suddenly seems so surreal. The feeling of Eve's hands traveling up her skin gives her goosebumps, and the early morning sunlight makes everything around the room seem golden. She realizes with a start that she doesn't know if she's ever been this happy.

The kiss slowly back down eventually, as if they both become content just holding each other at the same time. Eve is the first one to pull away, panting slightly, but smiling. She runs her hand over Annalise's cheek gently, letting her index fingers trace over the outline of her cheekbone.

"You're so beautiful," she whispers, and Annalise can feel the heat rising in her cheeks. She must look doubtful because Eve adds: "You are."

Annalise purses her lips, unable to come up with a suitable answer. How is she supposed to explain that she has only ever been beautiful to Eve? No one else has ever seen her in the same way. Luckily, Eve always knows what to say.

"Annie," she murmurs, kissing Annalise's neck gently and managing to grasp her attention again. She grins when Annalise huffs softly, even though the nickname makes her stomach do a somersault.

"Annie and Eve," Annalise muses to herself, and Eve beams. "What?"

"Nothing," Eve says, but she's still smiling. Annalise scoots away from her a bit and she pouts.

"What are you smiling like that for?" Annalise insists. Eve sighs loudly and Annalise rolls her eyes before returning to her arms. "Come on."

"It just makes us sound like a couple," Eve admits, wrapping her arms back around Annalise. Now it's Annalise who smiles. "I know it's dorky."

"It's cute," Annalise corrects, surprised by her own word choice. She feels like she is turning into a different person. Eve's smile widens though, and she suddenly doesn't mind so much.

"You're cute," Eve answers, rolling her eyes playfully. Annalise groans softly.

"Do you ever take a break from being like this?" she asks. But she's joking, because she knows for a fact that this is how Eve always is. Perfect. She laughs and that sound is perfect too, just like the soft kiss she gives Annalise after.

* * *

Annalise and Eve stay in bed for as long as possible. They only head downstairs when they hear the rest of the house come to life. Then their day is spent inside, mostly watching Emily and Michael Jr. while the other adults head down to the nearby lake to fish.

"Annie," Emily says, her voice determined. They are sitting in front of the living room tv, watching a Charlie Brown Christmas. Eve is holding Michael Jr. in her lap and Emily is sitting curled up next to Annalise. She's not paying attention to the tv though, but instead staring at Annalise's arm, which sits next to hers. "How come you're brown and I'm not?"

A surprised noise erupts from Eve. She starts to answer, or maybe apologize for Emily, but Annalise beats her to it.

"One day, I drank too much coffee," Annalise says, and Emily's face folds into confusion as Eve bursts out into a fit of giggles that take most of the rest of the movie to get under control.

This is funny at least until that night at dinner when Emily tries to nab a sip of her Dad's coffee and ends up spilling it. When her parents ask _now why on earth would she do that?_ her answer is a tearful _to be like Annie_. This gets Eve laughing all over again, and she doesn't stop until later that night when Annalise threatens to sleep in her own room unless she quits giggling.

"I'm serious, Eve!" Annalise says as Eve strokes her cheek, smiling. "I can't believe I had to explain to Kirsten that Emily thought drinking coffee would make her black."

"She thought it was funny," Eve mumbles, wiggling closer to Annalise and pecking her cheek then her lips softly. Annalise is too caught up in her head to kiss back and Eve sighs.

"It was so embarrassing," she says. "They're never going to let us watch the kids again." Eve raises her eyebrows at this.

"Is that what you're worried about?" Eve asks. She giggles again and Annalise huffs. "Annalise of course they will. Emily is in love with you, and so is Kirsten. My entire family thinks you're one of the smartest people they've ever met; they all love you. You have to know that."

Annalise just shrugs. Eve tilts her head.

"You don't believe me."

"Can you blame me?" Annalise answers. "It's only been a day."

"So what? It doesn't take that long to fall in love." Eve says. Then she glances down, suddenly shy. "At least, that's what I've heard."

"Yeah?" Annalise says quietly, focusing on Eve's sudden quietness and the slight blush in her cheeks. Annalise should be used to Eve's mannerism by now. She's always just as sweet, and just as attentive as she's being right now, but it still surprises Annalise. She also can't help but think about what she's insinuating. To fall in love.

"Yeah," Eve answers, bringing Annalise's attention back to her. Slowly, she runs her hand over Eve's cheek and helps her tilt her head up.

"Come here," Annalise whispers softly, tilting her head to the side and kissing her gently. Eve responds automatically, sighing and relaxing her body against Annalise's. Then even though it's technically not Christmas for a few more hours, Annalise feels like she's already got her present.

* * *

Annalise wakes up to Emily shaking her.

"Annie," she says, opening one of Annalise's eyes for her. Annalise yawns a bit and sits up slowly, making Emily squeal in excitement.

"She's awake, Auntie," Emily says happily, wrapping her arms around Annalise's neck. "Can we go downstairs now?" Annalise rubs her eyes tiredly, still trying to wake up completely. Eventually she's able to get her mind mostly clear and she looks at Eve, who is tying her hair in a ponytail at the vanity. She glances at her with a tired smile.

"Good morning," Eve says softly, picking up Emily. "The kids are up, so we're going to watch them open their presents downstairs. You wanna come?" Annalise nods and climbs out of bed.

"I'm just going to wash up," she says, heading towards the door. Eve follows, setting Emily down so that she can run ahead down the stairs.

"Wait," Eve says as Annalise shuffles across hall. Annalise turns back and Eve pecks her lips gently, making her smile.

"Merry Christmas," Eve says after pulling back. Annalise's smile widens. "I'll wait for you out here."

"Merry Christmas," Annalise answers softly, heading into her room.

She comes back with her teeth brushed and face washed. Eve smiles when she steps out and takes her hand, pulling her close to peck her lips once more.

"C'mon," she says, tugging Annalise downstairs.

They head down to the living room, where everyone but Deborah (who is already starting to cook dinner) is watching Michael Jr. and Emily open their presents. Or really, watching Michael Jr. crawl around while Emily squeals over every present she gets.

As they sit down, Michael hands Emily a present in a blue bag. Annalise raises her eyebrow. This is the one that Annalise had picked out her when they went shopping. She watches as Emily pulls out the cabbage patch kid and her eyes widen.

"A doll!" Emily exclaims, hugging it to her. She looks up and notices Annalise and Eve sitting on the couch and crawls up between them. "It looks just like Annie! This is the best toy ever!"

Kirsten's eyes sparkles from her place on the couch. She winks at Annalise.

Annalise smiles a bit at this, and a sudden content feeling spreads over and Emily plays with the doll. Eve steals a glance at her and smiles a little, managing to slide her hand over and squeeze it. Eve's dad sets down his newspaper for a second to look over and smile. He stands up after, stretching a bit.

"I'm going to go get some hot chocolate," he announces, looking around, but mostly at Annalise. "Does anybody else want some?"

"I'll go," Annalise says, standing up and adjusting her pajama bottoms as she follows him into the kitchen

"So," Simon says, grabbing a couple of mugs and handing two to Annalise. Annalise assumes the second cup is for Eve. "Eve is completely enamored by you." Annalise's lips form a small smile.

"Really?" she says, still surprised to hear anyone reference how much Eve liked her. "I care a lot about her."

"That's good," Simon says, taking the saucepan Deborah hands him and adding hot chocolate to each mug. "But you all aren't dating?"

"Not right now," Annalise answers carefully. But soon, she almost adds. It seems almost inevitable now, and she likes the idea, although it gives her nervous chills to think about it. Eve's dad nods to himself slowly.

"But she brought you here," he adds, as if he's reasoning with himself. This reminds Annalise so much of Eve that she has to smile again before saying thank you to Deborah for the hot chocolate.

"She's amazing," Annalise says after a second. "Really. I'm sure you know, but I've never met anyone like her before." Simon looks up at this, and finally he smiles.

"Funny," he says. "She says similar things about you." He pauses and sips his hot chocolate.

"Take care of her, will you? She's been through a lot, even though she won't always say so. She lost her mother so early and there were certain things I didn't know how to teach her. She really was always such a good girl though. And I've never seen her as happy as she is with you. She cares so much about you."

"I know," Annalise says softly, her cheeks darkening. "I'll try to take care of her." The pressure is suddenly a bit much. It seemed like Eve's family was just like her, if not a little more vocal. They all did seem to be rooting for them to get together. Annalise liked Eve of course, but she had never been in a situation like this.

Simon smiles at Annalise, and just like when Eve smiles at her, he looks so content that Annalise has to smile back.

"Good," he says, picking up his mug. Annalise starts to do the same, but then Eve steps in, looking extremely curious.

"Hey," Annalise says, motioning to one of the cups of hot chocolate. "This was for you."

"Thanks," Eve says, smiling gently. "I was going to go get everyone's presents from upstairs. Wanna come?" She looks a bit nervous, and so Annalise nods.

"Sure," she says, leaving the mugs on the counter and following Eve as she heads up the stairs and to her room.

"What did my dad ask?" Eve says once they get into her room. She crouches down and pulls a few presents from under the bed. "Did he grill you?"

"No, not at all," Annalise says, surprised by Eve's concern. "He just told me you liked me." She decides to leave out the part about about taking care of Eve.

"Oh," Eve says, exhaling as she sets the presents on top of the bed. "Nothing you didn't already know then. Did you bring the present I gave you?"

"Of course," Annalise answers, tugging Eve over to her. She kisses her cheek, making Eve relax a bit. "Did you bring mine?"

"Yeah," Eve answers, smiling a bit finally. "How about we open them together up here?"

"You don't want to go downstairs?" Annalise asks, although she'd honestly love to just sit upstairs with Eve. She loved her family of course, but whenever they were together alone it was so much easier to just relax.

"They won't miss us," Eve says with a lopsided grin. "I'll just take these downstairs real quick."

She pecks Annalise's lips before grabbing the gifts on the bed and heading downstairs. As she does that, Annalise heads across the hall and grabs the gifts she's gotten from Eve, Lisa, Kim, and her brother before returning to Eve's room.

When Eve comes back, she has new gifts in her hand as well as the hot chocolate, but she sets them on the dresser nonchalantly before she grabs Annalise's gift from her top drawer.

"You first," she says to Annalise, sitting next to her on the bed, smiling.

"Alright," Annalise agrees, starting to unwrap Eve's gift. It's perfectly decorated of course, because everything Eve does is perfect. When she gets all of the wrapping paper off, there's a white box underneath. Annalise opens it to find a gorgeous red dress underneath. "Eve."

Eve just smiles a bit as Annalise takes the dress out of the box and lays it out. The fabric is unbelievably soft and the dress seems to be cut just right to hug her shape.

"Eve this is beautiful," Annalise whispers, running her hand over it. She doesn't know if she's ever owned anything so lovely. "This must have cost a fortune, I can't-"

"You have to," Eve says. "It wasn't that much, really. I just never want to hear the excuse that you don't have anything to wear again. Plus, I think you look nice in red."

Annalise's face softens. Eve makes it impossible not to want to be with her. Annalise inhales shakily as she looks at her, getting that uncomfortable heart swelling feeling in her chest again.

"Thank you," she manages to whisper. Eve smiles softly.

"You're welcome," Eve answers, picking up Annalise small box. "My turn."

With delicate fingers, she unwraps Annalise present, raising her eyes to look at Annalise when she sees that it's a jewelry box. Slowly, she opens it, revealing a gold "e" charm.

"It's for your necklace," Annalise says quickly, feeling a bit embarrassed after the enormity of Eve's gift. "I thought you'd like it."

"I love it, Annalise," Eve says, so suddenly and sincerely that Annalise didn't doubt her for a second. "It's perfect, thank you. Help me put it on." She picks it up and hands it to Annalise before turning her back to her. Annalise unhooks her necklace and slides it on before placing it back on her neck gently. When Eve turns back around, she's smiling widely.

"You promise you like it?" Annalise asks softly. She can't stop looking over at the dress Eve bought for her and thinking about how nice it is compared to her small gift.

"Of course I do," Eve says, tilting Annalise's head over so that she can look at her. She flattens her palm against Annalise's cheek and grins. "But to be fair, I'd like anything you picked out for me."

Annalise leans in and kisses her softly after this. Eve kisses her back of course, teasingly biting Annalise's bottom lip and making a shiver run down her spine before pulling back. Annalise feels like she should say something, but words escape her mind and all she can do is exhale and looking at Eve smiling at her and promise herself that she'll always remember this feeling.

* * *

Annalise opens the rest of her presents in bed with Eve too. Lisa's present is a denim jacket and Kim's is a crocheted scarf. She saves her family's present for last, but when she opens the box it's just an envelope. Annalise opens it carefully, and her mouth drops.

"Oh my god," she whispers, making Eve look up from a card.

"What?" she asks, peering into Annalise's box and watching as she fans out the large amount of cash in her hands.

"I don't know where he got this," Annalise says, her voice oddly quiet. She looks at the bills in her hands, ranging from 100 to 1, mostly crumpled. When she counts it out later, she'll find that it's nearly 500 dollars. But she wasn't worried about counting at first. "Can I use the phone?"

And now she was standing in the office upstairs, waiting for someone to answer the phone, hopefully her brother and not her mother, the envelope in her grasp.

"Hello?" Raymond answers, and Annalise exhales gratefully.

"Raymond," she says, her voice fierce. "Where did you get this cash from? You dealing? I'll tell momma, I swear to god-" She's interrupted by Raymond's laughing.

"Annalise I ain't have nothing to do with that money," he says calmly. "Momma didn't even let anyone else touch your present; it's been in her room for weeks."

"You mean momma got this?" Annalise asks in disbelief, her heart sinking with the feeling of guilt. "How?"

"She's been taking up collections at church," Raymond says. "She didn't ask for one this Sunday because she knew you'd be mad if you found out. She's been working a couple extra shifts cleaning the bank downtown too."

Extra shifts.

And Annalise had called her a glorified slave. Her heart sinks.

"I had no idea," is all she can say. "She's still mad at me you think?" Raymond makes a noise.

"Yeah, she's a little upset," he admits. "She left the house to see Nana early this morning. She's been a little grumbly, but I just think she misses you."

"I need to talk to her," Annalise says, mostly to herself. "I'll call her soon."

"You do that," Raymond says. "So, how much was it?"

"What?" Annalise responds, surprised. "I don't know. I didn't count it." Her brother snorts.

"You better get off the phone and count that money," Raymond says. He pauses. "Merry Christmas, Mae. We miss you."

"I miss y'all, too," Annalise answers honestly. She says goodbye after, but even after she hangs up the phone, she looks at it for a long time. She had definitely fucked up.

* * *

For the rest of vacation, Annalise is a little more in her head than she'd like to be. Whenever she calls home, her mother isn't there or won't talk to her. She has to remind herself that at first, it had been the other way around and it had been Annalise who had just wanted to be left alone.

Eve notices that something changes and she gives Annalise her space, but she also tries to make sure she has fun. She takes her to the ice skating rink downtown, and Annalise ice skates for the very first time. She fall down a lot, but Eve always helps her up. They sleep in the same bed every night now, and Annalise relishes the slow minutes in the morning when she can just be with Eve and stroke her hair and kiss her if she wants to, although something inside her now seems to equate Eve with betraying her mother, which makes her pull back. Eve is the same though. She's understanding and eventually she asks what it is that's bothering Annalise And finally, finally on New Year's Eve, Annalise finds the guts to tell her about what's been going on.

"It's my mother," Annalise says, sitting on the front porch across from Eve. It's 11:45 and everyone else is watching the tv, but Eve had pulled Annalise out when she noticed she wasn't talking to anyone. "She's a good person really. You saw her Christmas gift. I know she has to love me. It's just that she acts so upset when I go home. Like she's mad that I went to college. She acts like I left Jasper just to get away from her and our family, but that's not it. I mean, I didn't even really know how much I hated it there until I left. I just see this look in her eyes when I talk about school and I know she hates it but I don't know why."

Eve thinks for a moment before answering, playing with the new charm on her necklace.

"I don't think it's you going to school that she hates," she answers slowly. "Every parent wants their kid to have the best things, including education. I guess it's maybe just that she feels guilty that she couldn't give you what you wanted, you know? Like maybe by going so far away, you made her feel like you thought the home she provided wasn't good enough. And I'm not saying that that's true, but that would explain her reaction. Maybe she just wants to know that you're grateful and that you love her, even if you had to leave."

Guilty. Annalise had never thought of Ophelia feeling guilty about not being able to give Annalise the best of the best. She had never been ashamed of taking what people offered or accepting help when it was needed. She had never been ashamed of anything. But like Annalise, she was proud. And if Annalise had wounded her pride, that would explain her reaction in Jasper.

"You're so smart," Annalise says eventually. Eve smiles a little.

"Not really," she says, shrugging. But her cheeks are pink. In the house, they start counting down.

 _Ten, nine, eight._

In 15 minutes, Eve had just solved the dilemma Annalise had been mulling over for weeks.

 _Seven, six, five._

She was smart, even if she didn't want to admit it. And she always could fix any problem.

 _Four, three, two._

She was amazing. Annalise didn't even deserve to be her friend, much less the recipient of her many affections.

 _One_.

Annalise crashes her lips against Eve's. She doesn't want to start another year without her.


	12. First Times and Forgiveness

On Saturday night, Annalise stretches out on her dorm room bed and inhales deeply. Lisa hadn't gotten home yet, and so for the first time in weeks she was alone with her thoughts. Classes started the day after tomorrow, and Eve had dropped her off that night with a tender smile and a squeeze of the hand, but when she tilted her head in just slightly for a kiss, Annalise had turned away and said goodnight.

It wasn't fair for her to do that. She knew it wasn't and she had been thinking about it ever since Eve left. All over break Eve had been absolutely perfect and Annalise knew that as well, but for some reason on the drive home, around the time they entered Boston, some wave of fear had rolled over her and the question of what she and Eve were caught up with her. She shouldn't have been bothered by it. Eve seemed like a great person to be with. Even after Annalise admitted her concerns to her that first night, she hadn't changed her manner one bit, and if anything, Annalise should have only been assured of her feelings for Eve, and for the few weeks that they had been out of Boston, she was. But coming back into Massachusetts meant coming back to the real world. Lisa seemed to know more than Annalise had told her and didn't seem to mind Annalise's relationship with Eve, but what would everyone else think? Her mother especially would have a problem with it, she knew and she couldn't deal with that, not now when she had already messed so much up. She also knew in the back of her mind that there was always the possibility of her progressing backwards and freezing up and she didn't want that. She had never told anyone what happened to her, and she wasn't going to start with Eve, because she knew Eve would grill her about her reaction and she'd end up telling her everything one way or another. But Annalise hated what happened to her and she hated the reactions she anticipated, even more than she hated the hurt look on Eve's face. So her only option, really, was to pull away, and hope that they could stay friends.

Annalise reaches over now and grabs the phone to try calling her mother again. She isn't expecting for her to pick up, but after the second ring, she hears Ophelia's voice.

"Hello," she answers and Annalise's breath catches.

"Mama," she says quickly, before her mother can hang up or start lecturing. "I'm so sorry for the way I acted. It wasn't right for me to talk to you like that and I know you've made sacrifices, I know that, and I'm sorry for acting so spoiled. I appreciate you, really."

Annalise's mother is silent for a moment as Annalise breathes softly.

"Thank you," she says, and Annalise lets out a sigh of relief. "How was your Christmas?"

Annalise is a bit vague after that, not wanting to let on too much about Eve. She just says that her Christmas was okay, and that she stayed with a friend, but that she missed being home and that she was very very grateful for her gift.

When she hangs up the phone, Annalise feels like a weight has been lifted off of her shoulders. She should be able to sleep like a baby. But when she gets in bed later on, she can't fall asleep. She twists and turns and tries to adjust her pillow, but no matter what, she cannot fall asleep.

As she sits up for the 500th time, the phone starts ringing. Confused, Annalise glances at the clock, blinking as if the red 3:55 staring back at her must be wrong. She climbs out of bed and heads to the living room, where she picks up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Hey," floats back Eve's voice. "Did I wake you?"

"No," Annalise answers, smiling a little bit, despite herself. "I couldn't sleep anyways." Eve lets out a breath on the other end of the line.

"Me either," Eve answers quietly. "I miss you. I know it's only been a few hours, and we were together for such a long time but-"

"It's hard to sleep without you," Annalise realizes out loud. Eve chuckles softly and if Annalise closes her eyes, she can imagine Eve laying next to her in bed and feel an arm wrapped loosely around her waist and then lips lightly brushing against her neck.

"I know," Eve says. "I guess it'll wear off soon. Talking to you helps." Annalise smiles softly, and sinks into the couch, letting her eyes close as she cradles the phone.

"Yeah," she says quietly. "It helps."

Annalise falls asleep on the phone that night, and then most nights after that. When school starts up again, she doesn't hang out with Eve as much. Eve is always busy on weekends, and right after their classes she disappears. The gym is deserted in the mornings, even when Annalise waits as late as she possibly can just to see if she'll show up.

But she calls every night. She explains or apologizes, and then she always gives Annalise a sweet goodnight before they hang up. Annalise misses her though. Eve was making it awfully easy for Annalise to forget about winter break, and even though Annalise thought that was what she wanted, she hated how it was happening. She had one trick up her sleeve, though. Eve's birthday. It was on the 15th of February, the day after Valentine's Day. Annalise starts planning for it in mid-January, because she needs it to be perfect. It might have been the last excuse she'd have to talk to Eve for awhile. Besides, Annalise owed her anyways.

February 15th falls on a Sunday. Because of this, Annalise has to make dinner plans pretty early at 6:00. The night before, when they're on the phone, she had made sure Eve was free the following night and willing to dress up. Now, at 4:45, she's trying to get dressed as quickly as possible. Her hair, now back in box braids, had gone up in a ponytail as she tried to get her makeup just right. She rummages through her drawers until she finds a lacy bra and underwear set and slips them on. It's not until she glances at herself in the mirror that she realizes that for the first time maybe ever, she cares about what she has on under her clothes. She pauses for a second and straightens up, brushing a braid out of her face as she runs her eyes down her figure. She's pretty attractive, she thinks, her stomach is flat and her chest relatively large. She looks good in black lace. She had seen the way Eve looked at her before, her eyes yearning, biting her lip. If Annalise allowed it to, this night could turn into something serious. She expected to feel nervous, but instead in the pit of her belly she felt excitement. She hadn't kissed Eve since New Year's, and she missed being around her terribly, even though she tried her hardest not to think about it. She was sick of missing Eve though. The longer they were apart, the harder it was for her to care about whatever consequences might come from being with her. For weeks on end, she had been thinking about cuddling with Eve and kissing Eve and the warm feeling she'd gotten in her belly that one night. She realizes slowly that this is what it felt like to want to have sex. Her hands shake slightly, and Annalise wrings them as she turns away from the mirror. She has to calm down if she wants this night to be a success. So she slips into the dress Eve had bought her for Christmas and takes her hair down, then puts on her shoes. She does glance at herself in the mirror once more before leaving, and she sees that she has a hint of a smile on her face, despite her nerves. With a shaky inhale, she grabs Eve's present from the top of her dresser, and then some of the cash her mother had given her out of her jewelry box. She'd put most of it in the bank after Christmas, but she'd known that she wanted to use some of it for an occasion like this. After tucking it into her wallet, she heads out of the door with a quick prayer that the night goes right.

* * *

"Wow," is the first thing that Annalise says when Eve opens the door. She's dressed in a tight, black dress, which looks fantastic against her creamy complexion. She's let her hair down from the ponytail she's been wearing lately, and of course, she's wearing the charm Annalise had given her on her necklace. She smiles softly when Annalise says this, although her cheeks are a bit red.

"Thanks," she says quietly, her tone a bit reserved. Annalise hands her the small bag in her hands, and her smile widens just a bit before she steps back to let Annalise inside. "You didn't have to get me anything."

"It's nothing too big, so don't worry," Annalise says, smiling and leaning against the wall. Eve rummages through the bag, and pulls out it's contents, revealing a pack of ballpoint pens. "Because I owe you for the first day of school."

Eve glances up at this, and a real grin floods her face, making a shiver run up Annalise's spine. Eve giggles softly before wrapping her arms around herself happily.

"This is great, Annalise," she says, her eyes sparkling before she casts them down again. "Thank you. And you look fantastic by the way."

Annalise shrugs slightly, smiling back at Eve. She notices that Eve hasn't been able to look her in the eye so far, but she dismisses the thought as she glances at her watch.

"Come on, we've gotta go," she says, tucking her hands into her coat as Eve sets down the pens and grabs her peacoat, putting it on with a scarf. They leave hurriedly, and as they step out of the building, Annalise can't help but take another long look at Eve's legs. Her stomach does a flip and she shakes her head slightly to try and clear her mind.

"Where are we headed?" Eve asks, her feet crunching in the snow. Annalise grins.

"Just across the street," she says, nodding to the restaurant ahead of them. It was a small Italian place, and it seemed very nice, but expensive. Annalise and Eve had joked a few times about switching it up and going there instead of to Angelo's. It had always just been a joke though, and Annalise sees Eve's eyes widen as Annalise opens the door.

"I can't ask you to do this," she starts, but Annalise shakes her head adamantly, trying her hardest to commit the suprised look on Eve's face to memory.

"I want to," she insists after giving the host her name. "Besides, I already made reservations."

Eve's mouth flattens, and it looks like she wants to argue, but eventually, she follows Annalise to a table near a window at the back.

"It's gorgeous here," Eve says, looking around after they sit. Annalise smiles, pleased with her choice. "And you look gorgeous. That dress fits you well."

Eve inhales after saying this, biting her lip. Annalise tries to smile at her encouragingly, but her eyes are cast down.

"You have good taste," Annalise encourages, smiling softly. Eve looks up shyly and grins, and Annalise lets out a small sigh of relief.

"I guess I do," she says

Annalise thinks she starts to say something back, but then the waiter comes over and sets down bread.

"Can I get you ladies anything to drink?" he asks. Annalise looks to Eve, tilting her head slightly.

"Do you want wine or anything?" she asks. "Whatever you want." Eve bites down on her bottom lip and thinks for a second before looking at the waiter.

"Just water for me," she says, flicking her eyes back over at Annalise. "I think I want to remember tonight." Annalise smiles widely and asks for a water as well before ordering spaghetti. Eve orders a personal pizza, to Annalise's amusement When the waiter walks away, she giggles a little at Eve.

"So," she starts, cutting herself a piece of bread.

"So," Eve answers, smiling shyly. She hands Annalise the butter.

"Tell me a story," Annalise says, looking up at Eve as she spreads butter on her bread. She takes a bite and chews before continuing. "Or just something I don't know about you. Anything."

"Like what exactly?" Eve asks, taking a piece of bread herself. "I feel like you know a lot about me already. And anything that I didn't want to tell you, my dad told you over break." Annalise smiles a little to herself.

"Like maybe why you want to be a death row lawyer," Annalise says, remembering that Eve had commented something about it one day at the gym. "You can't expect to win all the time in a role like that."

"It's not about winning," Eve says, smiling softly. "There are innocent people on death row. And I kind of feel like everyone should have a second chance.

"Everyone?" Annalise asks doubtfully. Eve chuckles, picking at her bread.

"I know," she says. "I can't explain it really. It may have something to do with my mom. I feel like she felt guilty for drinking, and so she kind of drank more to stop feeling guilty. But what I don't think she knew was that I would have forgiven her if she asked. Without hesitation. I think that if some people just knew that they could be forgiven, they might change. I know that it doesn't apply to everyone, and it sounds silly out loud." She trails off after this and blushes slightly.

"No it doesn't," Annalise says slowly, turning Eve's words over in her mind. "It makes sense." The idea of the importance of forgiveness explained Eve perfectly. Annalise couldn't help thinking of her as a bit idealistic, if not naive, but she also couldn't help but love the hopeful sparkle in her eyes and the positivity of the words. Annalise knew she could be cynical, and so it was nice to sit with Eve and listen to her view.

As the waiter returned with drinks she decides then that she believes Eve could find the good in anyone.

* * *

"I have one more question," Annalise says as they exit the restaurant. She had been asking different questions all night to try and get Eve to open up a little more, but even though she got smiles and honest answers, Eve still seemed oddly quiet and a little tense. "What made you like me?"

"What do you mean?" Eve asked, her head down and her hands tucked into her coat pockets even though Annalise wishes she was clutching them in her own hands.

"I mean, what made you talk to me on that first day?" Annalise asks, frowning slightly as they stand at the crosswalk. She couldn't tell if Eve was having a good night or not. She had smiled and giggled at certain points during dinner, but she had also withdrawn herself after every laugh. Annalise had wanted this night to be perfect, but she couldn't seem to get Eve's full attention. She wanted to do something nice in return for every sweet thing Eve had done. She wanted to prove that she still cared about her, and that she missed her. "What made you ask me to lunch, and what made you come to my room before sunrise and ask me to go to the gym. I'm asking what made you interested in me, because I know it wasn't my sunny disposition."

Eve glances at Annalise quickly before they cross the street. She doesn't answer until after they step into her building.

"You surprise me," she answers finally. "All the time. And I like surprises."

This is all the answer Annalise receives. She's still mulling on it after they go up the stairs and get to Eve's apartment. Eve unlocks the door. She looks up at Annalise with one of her eyebrows raised.

"Coming in?"

"Sure," Annalise answers, although she's not completely sure that she's welcome. She follows Eve inside, watching as she removes her coat and tosses it to the side, then as she slips her shoes off and shakes her hair out. Eve catches Annalise looking, and her cheeks flush a deep red.

"Sit down," she says softly, helping Annalise out of her coat and setting it to the side with her own. Annalise follows instructions and sits on the couch, frowning as Eve sits on the other end, at least a foot away. She surveys her before speaking up.

"What's wrong?" Annalise asks finally as she looks at Eve, who is shifting her hands at the other end of the couch. Things should be going differently. She wanted to kiss Eve so badly, or be in her arms or something, but Eve keeps looking away like she has all night and she hasn't touched Annalise once, which is completely out of character. She isn't herself, and that worries Annalise. She sees Eve about to say nothing and so she adds: "Eve, really."

"I know that you don't want to be together," Eve says slowly, surprising Annalise. "I got that things changed when winter break ended. It's just been a little hard for me to set my feelings aside. I know I've been kind of avoiding you, but that's only because I don't know how to be around you and not want more. I was doing okay too, but then you did this for me and it's like I'm right back in Knoxville wanting to kiss you all the time and I'm trying to deal with that. I'm really sorry."

The distress in Eve's voice makes Annalise's heart plummet. Suddenly everything she'd been worried about that night made sense. Eve casting her eyes away, trying to control her laughter. Annalise shakes her head immediately and moves closer, reaching over and taking Eve's hand.

"That's not what I wanted," she says softly in quiet, quick words. Eve looks up at her, her eyes wavering. "I miss you Eve. I want more too, I want you."

"Annalise," Eve tries, sounding doubtful, but Annalise continues.

"I want you," Annalise repeats, squeezing Eve's hands in her own. "God, I want you, Eve." She looks Eve in the eye as she says this, her voice lowering on the last sentence. Everything she says is absolutely true and Eve's lips part slightly as she looks at Annalise a bit skeptically, but she does raise her hands to Annalise's cheeks, stroking them softly. Annalise takes this opportunity to kiss Eve deeply, and thankfully, Eve kisses back.

Most of their previous kisses had started off slow, but this kiss is needy and desperate from the very beginning. Annalise had almost forgotten how soft Eve's lips were, or how good her touch felt on her skin. Her fingertips are warm, and when her body presses against Annalise's she can feel the thudding of her heartbeat. Eve's hands travel down quickly, running over Annalise's waist. When her fingertips graze her thighs, Annalise shivers. Eve pauses for a second, but Annalise only shifts closer, wrapping her arms around Eve's neck. She wants this. Every bone in her body feels like it's on fire. She had dreamed about this, anticipated it all night. Now finally here her opportunity was and for once in her life, something was going just as she had planned it. Lightly, she lets one hand rest on Eve's chest, and underneath her, she feels Eve's body tense.

"Annalise," she whispers, worry edging her voice. Annalise pulls back for a second to see what's bothering her, but when she does, all she sees are Eve's dilated pupils and the small goosebumps on her forearms. Erased was the worry from just a few minutes ago. "Is this what you want? All of it?"

All of it. Sex. For Eve to see her without any clothes. To finally do something that had always scared her to death, but that also made her feel more alive than ever at this very moment.

"Yes," she says, nodding slightly, her voice barely above a whisper. She lets her fingers trace the outline of Eve's beautifully molded jawline before pressing lips to her neck softly. "Yes, this is what I want."

Eve smiles. Really smiles and Annalise feels a jolt of electricity light up her entire body when the next kiss comes. Eve's lips travel down quickly, over Annalise neck and her mostly exposed shoulder. Annalise moans gently, causing Eve to pull back. She starts to complain, but then Eve is standing and tugging Annalise back to the bedroom.

"C'mon," she whispers, glancing back at Annalise. A long time from now, Annalise is sure she'll always remember this moment. Eve's hair slightly mussed, her flushed cheeks, the half grin on her face, the material of her dress hugging every little curve. Annalise smiles back and allows herself to be pulled into the bedroom.

 ** _AN: Alright, so I know this is such a short chapter and this is a kind of an awful place to end it, but I wanted to get you all's input on the next chapter. Either I can go more in depth on their first time (so sex) or I can skip to the next morning. Put your preference into a review please, and as always, thank you all for being faithful readers._**


	13. First Times Continued

_**AN: Okay so most of you guys asked for a sex scene, so here it is. This is a short chapter, just talking about their first time. If you don't want to read anything rated M, you can skip this chapter and pick up in the next one and it'll still all make sense. I hope you all enjoy. Also, I'd like to say thank you for 100+ reviews; I can't believe it! You all are so dedicated and I appreciate every review. Please continue to leave you support and suggestions.**_

After Eve pulls Annalise into the bedroom, she closes the door with a small _click_ and heads over to the radio she has sitting on her bedside table. Prince's voice floats around the room softly, and Annalise smiles a bit as Eve turns back to her, biting her lip in that way that always makes a shiver run up Annalise's spine. The only difference is that now, Annalise doesn't turn away and wait for the feeling to subside. Instead, she steps in and places one hand on Eve's waist and the other on her cheek before leaning in and pressing her lips against Eve's. Eve responds immediately, kissing back gently and caressing Annalise's face. The rush from earlier had subsided, and now it seemed as if they had all the time in the world. Eve lips travel over Annalise's neck gently, and then her collarbone and upper chest. Slowly, she tugs one of Annalise's dress straps off of her shoulder before kissing it as well. Annalise shivers slightly and Eve pauses and looks up, a small smile on her face, but concern lingering in her eyes.

"We can stop," she says softly, and wave of relief rushes through Annalise's body as she remembers that Eve will always allow her to be in control. There is no reason to be tense, or to worry that something will happen if she doesn't want it to.

"No," Annalise answers, inhaling softly. Eve raises her head slightly to look at Annalise, stroking her thumb over her cheek. Then she captures Annalise's lips in her own again. This kiss is a quick one, and then Eve is turning around, her back to Annalise.

"Unzip me?" she asks quietly, and Annalise inhales and complies, tugging Eve's zipper down until her dress loosens up and drops to the ground, revealing the sheer, cream, material of Eve's underwear and matching bra. When Annalise exhales, her breath is shaky. She had always known that Eve was beautiful. But here, in the dim light of her bedroom, with Prince's voice crooning in the background, she was absolutely breathtaking. Eve watches Annalise with a shy smile. "You're nervous."

"I've never done this before," Annalise admits softly, but Eve only shrugs.

"It's not that much different than being with a guy," she says, moving her hair behind shoulder. Annalise should correct her and explain that she had never been with anyone, but she doesn't want to be embarrassed. So she instead, she keeps her mouth shut and lets Eve pull her closer. "C'mon, turn around. I'll show you what to do,"

Annalise does as told and spins around, letting Eve unzip her dress and then kicking it aside along with her shoes when it joins Eve's on the bedroom floor. She exhales softly as she surveys Annalise's body carefully, and Annalise notices that she bites her lip again as her hands run down her waist.

"You're gorgeous, you know."

Annalise blushes, but Eve only leans in and kisses her once more before stepping back towards the bed and pulling Annalise with her gently, She guides her to lay on her back, and then her lips are on Annalise's again. She nibbles gently on her bottom lip, coaxing Annalise to part her lips as Eve deepens the kiss. Eve's hand travels over Annalise's shoulder softly, then down over her chest, where she squeezes softly. A small noise of appreciation comes from Annalise, and she leans up reflexively to allow Eve to unhook her bra and toss it to the side. Her mouth moves south then, over Annalise's collar and upper chest, over her shoulders and upper arms and her hands, then finally, over her chest. Eve's tongue darts out experimentally over one of Annalise's nipples, giving Annalise goosebumps and making her giggle. Eve glances up, and Annalise sees her smile before she dips her head back down to continue her ministrations.

At this point, Annalise lets her eyes flutter close and her body relax. She had never expected this to feel so _good_. Her body responds voluntarily when Eve touches her, and even though she had been worried about so many things, she can't remember what any of them were right now because all she could focus on were Eve's mouth and her hands, clutching Annalise's waist and then slowly beginning to rub her thighs. As Eve continues to nibble and suck and kiss over her breasts, Annalise's notices that same belly-warming feeling that she'd gotten a few times over break. Eve's mouth lowers a little, moving down the center of her stomach and then hovering over her bellybutton, and the feeling becomes more intense. When she tries to shift a little to become less uncomfortable, she's startled to find that she's wet between her legs. Moving also doesn't help, and she finds herself trying to rub her legs together for a bit of release. Eve notices this almost immediately and glances up at Annalise, her eyebrows raised.

"Am I moving too slowly?" she says before giggling softly against Annalise's skin, making her back arch. Annalise wasn't exactly sure what happened next to be fair, but she definitely knew that it wasn't going to get done with her underwear one. Thankfully, Eve wiggles down a bit and tugs off Annalise's panties before spreading her legs gently and settling down on her stomach in the middle. Annalise holds her breath as Eve's fingers run over her core slightly, and she starts to say something, but then Eve leans in and Annalise can feel her tongue between her legs and it feels like the world around her shatters.

" _Oh,"_ she manages to get out, twisting the sheets on Eve's bed in her hands. "Oh, _wow._ " Annalise has no idea how Eve knows exactly where to touch, or how her tongue can feel so gentle but so powerful at the same time. Her hands tug at the sheets again involuntarily as she attempts to ground herself. Every time Eve's tongue moves even just a bit, a wave of pleasure rolls up Annalise's body. She had imagined different things, and she had worried about freezing up, but in this moment she realized that she had never felt more free and she absolutely loved the fact that Eve gave her that.

One of Eve's hands is on Annalise's thigh, stroking softly. It reminds her of where she is and who she's with, although she didn't think she could really forget anyways. The other hand strokes Annalise's core gently as Eve pulls her head back. Annalise's eyes open and her hips buck slightly in protest to the loss of contact and she hears Eve giggle softly before slowly and carefully inserting a finger into Annalise. It's an odd feeling at first, but soon she starts moving it gently and pressing a spot that feels absolutely lovely, and then she brings her mouth back to Annalise's core and Annalise bites down on her lip as she starts sucking at a particularly sensitive area. She feels like she should be saying something, letting Eve know that she _loves_ whatever it is that she's doing, but the words get stuck in her throat and she can do is roll her hips against Eve's mouth and shudder every time she touches a sensitive spot. This seems to start happening more and more frequently, and soon Annalise can feel her legs quivering and her lower stomach tightening. Suddenly the pleasure she's feeling begins to intensify and a low moan erupts from her as she clutches at the sheets. Then she can feel Eve moan into her, sending a slight vibration through her body and that is what sends her over the edge. Annalise feels the orgasm roll up her body suddenly, and she gasps softly as she experiences a pleasure like she's never felt before. Her eyes screw shut and she can feel herself tightening around Eve's finger and she even _whimpers_ softly as she rides out the last few electric waves of her orgasm. All she can think about is that she had never _known_ it would feel like this.

When the shaking and the tensing of her body stops, she feels more satisfied that she has in a long time. Eve has pulled away, and Annalise's sees her sucking on her middle finger, her other hand still stroking Annalise's thigh. She slides upward and quickly captures Annalise's lips on her own. It's funny to taste herself on Eve's mouth, but not at all unpleasurable. She gasps a little when Eve's leg brushes her core, which is now unbelievably sensitive. Eve moves back after this, moving a braid out of Annalise's face.

"Sorry," she says quietly before giving Annalise another soft kiss. "Was that okay?" Annalise has to swallow before answering. She searches Eve's face with her eyes to see if she could be joking.

"Eve, that was amazing," she says quietly in between kisses. "I never..." She trails off and Eve giggles softly, letting her hand run over Annalise's right breast, her index fingers teasing the hardened nipple.

"Good," she whispers, smiling softly. Annalise has to exhale in disbelief one more time as she strokes Eve's cheek, which is impossibly softly. Her mind is still reeling from the whole experience, and a small part of her is secretly afraid that she'll wake up, and this will all have been a dream. But no matter how many times she blinks, Eve is still there, smiling at her in the dim light, pressing her lips to Annalise's neck every now and then. She wants to convey to Eve how much she appreciated what had just happened, how it had made her _feel._

"Can I do you?" she asks quietly, and Eve's eyes seem to widen in shock. She recovers quickly and nods. Even though there's not much light in the bedroom, Annalise is almost sure she's blushing.

"Sure," Eve says, nodding quickly and biting down on her bottom lip. She moves from over top of Annalise and lays beside her on her back. Carefully, Annalise switches positions and straddles her, wiggling a little to get settled. Eve moans softly, and when Annalise looks into her eyes from this position, she can tell that Eve's just as eager as Annalise had been. Not wanting to make her wait, Annalise quickly leans down and removes Eve's bra before cupping her chest and kissing over it gently. She is a bit nervous, but she was at least, paying attention to everything Eve had done. She uses her hands to massage Eve's breasts, and her mouth to lick and suck at her nipples. Every act she does earns a small moan or sigh from Eve, which Annalise takes as a good sign. Eve's hips begin to rotate a little, and she whispers to Annalise in the darkness.

"Keep going, Annie" she says, and Annalise can feel a rush of heat come to her cheeks. She nods slightly and starts to move down faster, trying to ignore her shaking hands. When she reaches Eve's panties, she pulls them off carefully and spreads Eve's legs a bit, marveling at what was in front of her. She grits her teeth, determined to make Eve feel exactly what she had. Experimentally, she cups Eve's core with her hand and rubs slowly, earning a moan from Eve, who raises her hips up until she's only about an inch from Annalise's mouth. Annalise takes this as a sign to continue and takes a deep breath before slowly starting to lick the length of Eve's slit. Eve's body shakes a little, and she begins to call out gentle instructions.

"Up a little. A little more, oh _there_. To the right. Not so hard. Mm, like that. Yes, _god,_ just like that. Annie, _yes._ "

Eve's voice raises in pitch as Annalise follows her instructions. She moves her own hand down, and Annalise watches as she slides two fingers in herself and curls them slightly before starting to pump them in and out. Annalise continues to lick slowly over the spot Eve had led her to and she realizes soon that Eve is squirming under her mouth, gripping the sheets with her free hand and whimpering softly. Remembering what Eve had done to her, Annalise begins to suck. This seems to help Eve orgasm, because soon enough, she's gasping and squealing and sitting up a bit as the muscles in her core tighten and spasm. Annalise releases her clit, but continues to lick softly as she watches Eve's eyes roll back a bit as the muscles in her stomach flex. She calls out Annalise's name, a little louder than she probably should with the neighbors being so close, but Annalise didn't care. All she could feel was pride.

As she comes down, Eve nudges Annalise away a little, still gasping.

"Sensitive," she manages to get out, tugging Annalise back up before kissing her on the mouth deeply. She pulls Annalise to her, and Annalise can feel their chest rubbing against each other's and how well their bodies fit together. Eve continues murmuring sweet things in between kisses, but she doesn't seem to want to pull away. Annalise sees no reason to complain. "That was so good, Annie. You're really good at that."

Annalise giggles softly, letting Eve's lips travel back over her neck and chest, squealing a little every now and then. She feels so incredibly free that it's hard to even think about it. She had conquered one of her greatest fears and with Eve, nonetheless. She hadn't ever been tempted to say that she loved someone before, but now, in the back of her mind, the thought was floating around. The _really_ strange thing was that she didn't mind. She didn't mind the uncertainty, or the feelings. She was finally _living._ Eve had taught her how to live, and for that she would always be grateful,


	14. Sunlit Skin and Soul Food

**_Alright, so this is the newest chapter, I hope you all enjoy it! Thank you to the people who added suggestions to their reviews, that always helps, especially when I get writers block. I think in the next chapter I might do a time skip, because I have a few ideas about their summer break. On an unrelated note, I spent last night catching up on HTGAWM and I saw what seems like Eve's last episode. Of course, I teared up a little while watching. Hopefully this story helps those of you who were just as upset as I was! As always, I'd like to thank you for your continued support._**

When Annalise wakes up in the morning, the first thing she notices is that she feels _so_ comfortable. Eve's mattress has always been infinitely softer than the one in her dorm room. She tugs the sheets up around her a bit more, causing Eve to stir next to her. When Annalise opens her eyes a bit, she sees Eve lying on her stomach to her right, her mouth slightly open and one of her arms sprawled across Annalise. She's naked of course, and as Annalise brushes a lock of hair out of her face, memories of last night run through her mind in double time. It still didn't seem real, but Annalise knew that it had to be, because here they were.

Annalise nudges Eve's arm off of her as she wiggles out of bed carefully, not wanting to wake Eve. She glanced at the clock to see that it was only just after 7. They still had time to sleep before Torts. She tiptoes over to Eve's dresser, grabbing a t-shirt and slipping it on before heading to the bathroom and yawning. When she gets inside, she glances at herself in the mirror to see that she's glowing slightly. Just looking at herself makes her blush so she turns away, even though she knows she smiling.

When she steps back out of the bathroom, Eve is still in the same position. However, when Annalise climbs back into the bed, she speaks up.

"I thought you'd left," she murmurs quietly, her eyes still closed. Annalise smiles softly, sinking down into the bed before turning on her side to face Eve.

"I wouldn't do that," she whispers, a small smile on her face. Eve opens her eyes slightly and a smile stretches across her face when she sees Annalise, making her blush. She sits up a bit on her elbow and wiggles closer to Annalise, daring to wrap her arms around her.

"You put on a shirt," she says, sounding disappointed. Annalise laughs softly, rolling her eyes playfully as Eve grins and presses a wet kiss to her cheek. Annalise squeals in protest, but when she sees the happy look on Eve's face, she doesn't mind at all. She looks so perfect, wrapped in sheets and her lips somehow still tinted red from last night's lipstick. She looks so happy that Annalise has to be happy as well. There's no room for worry when Eve is holding her this close.

"I felt exposed," she says, making Eve chuckle.

"Yes, and?" Eve says, humming softly as she plays with the hem of Annalise's shirt. "You're absolutely gorgeous if I didn't make that clear last night." Annalise's cheeks flush.

"Last night," she repeats softly, a smile on her face. Eve glances up at her, grinning slyly.

"Was it good for you then?" she asks, teasing playfully. "The best you've ever had?"

"The _only_ sex I've ever had," Annalise corrects, surprising herself with her boldness. Eve sits up, her eyebrows raised in surprise. She runs her eyes over Annalise's face, trying to tell if she's joking.

"The only sex?" she questions, and Annalise shrugs slightly. "You mean last night was your _first_ time?"

"I told you I'd never done it before," Annalise says, trying not to feel embarrassed. "Is it that surprising?"

"Kind of," Eve admits, looking at Annalise. "I mean, you just did such a good job-"

"Oh, I did?" Annalise asks, smirking a bit. Now it's Eve who's blushing.

"You did," she assures, glancing down a little, her smile now shy. "I hope everything was okay for you. I mean, I didn't know."

"It was great, Eve," Annalise says. "Honestly. If I had known it would be this good, I would have tried to get in your pants right after the first day of school." Eve giggles at this, pecking Annalise's grin.

"I can't even say that I would have protested," she says, smiling. She strokes Annalise's cheek quickly, running her eyes over Annalise's face. This makes Annalise a little insecure.

"What?" she asks. Eve shrugs a little. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"I just want to remember this," Eve says. "How happy I am." Annalise blushes.

"Well, try to remember me with makeup," she jokes. "Not like this. I want you to think back and remember my best self." Eve chuckles and rolls her eyes.

"You know I think you're beautiful," she says. It sounds so true when she says it, even though the statement doesn't make sense. But Eve looks like she believes every word, and it makes Annalise's heart stir. "Besides, if I'm being brutally honest, I'm trying to remember more than just your face." Annalise laughs and smacks Eve's arm lightly, making Eve laugh as well. Annalise lays her head on Eve's shoulder after this, smiling to herself in that stupid way that she sometimes does when Eve makes her feel content.

"C'mon, let's go back to sleep for a little while," Eve says, her voice now a bit softer. "I have to get up early to take my girlfriend to class." Annalise's head snaps up at the last sentence.

"Girlfriend?"

"A joke," Eve says casually, even though her cheeks are a little red. "Forget I said it." Annalise pauses. She feels like she might hate herself later for asking what she's about to, but she does it anyways.

"Is that what you want, though?" she says, her voice lowered a bit. "Eventually?" Eve sits up and surveys Annalise quickly.

"I thought that's what we both wanted," Eve answers slowly. "I mean, last night, I thought that you were saying that you did want to be together. I guess I misunderstood."

"I just don't see why things have to change," Annalise tries, but it sounds weak, even to her. She doesn't know why she's arguing anyways. She _had_ wanted this. It wasn't like she didn't like Eve. But here she was, pushing her away again and she couldn't even stop herself. They were in such a good place right now, though, and she didn't want to push that. She didn't want to even move from this bed. She reaches for Eve's hand and squeezes. "I like what we have right now."

She watches as Eve's nose wrinkles up a bit as she searches for an answer. She looks disappointed and Annalise watches as she tries to brush the emotion off.

"I want to be together," Eve says plainly, even though she looks a bit nervous. "That's what I want. If you don't want that, then I need to know."

"I'm not sure," Annalise says, regretting it as soon as the words are out of her mouth. Eve nods slightly before laying back down.  
"Okay," is her answer. "Get some rest."

"Eve," Annalise tries, but Eve looks away, turning so that her back is to Annalise's.

"Annalise, we have to get up in an hour," she says quietly. "I just want to sleep a little more."

"Okay," Annalise answers, looking away. She wants to reach out to Eve. The space between them makes her stomach sink. She shouldn't have said anything. She'd drained the insanely optimistic atmosphere and replaced it with doubt. She wants to cuddle back up to Eve, to lay her head on her shoulder, but instead, she lays down on her back and closes her eyes.

* * *

It feels like Eve's alarm goes off right after Annalise is finally able to go to sleep. Annalise gets up groggily, glancing over at Eve, who's face is covered by her comforter.

"You can shower first," she says to Annalise, her voice sounding tired. Annalise gets up and heads to the shower, now familiar with where to find towels and a washcloth and extra toothbrush. She showers quickly before doing her makeup with the remnants of things that she had left under Eve's sink on different nights. It was like they were already together in some respects. Annalise sighs as she looks at herself in the mirror. She wished that she could give Eve exactly what she wanted, but the more she thought about having a full blown relationship, the more the idea scared her. She would mess things up and lose Eve completely. She would freak out or something and scare her off. She would do _something_ wrong and wreck the relationship and lose all of the good things that had just come into her life as a result of Eve. She was never much of a gambler and so she'd rather take her winnings now than lose it all.

When she steps out of the bathroom, she has to freeze in her tracks. There's Eve, standing at her closet without a stitch of clothing on. Annalise's eyes hit the floor automatically, but she has already committed the sight to memory, Eve's skin highlighted with sunlight, her hair in a messy bun. It would be easier to remain friends if she wasn't so gorgeous.

"Sorry," Annalise hears her say, her voice all too calm. She lays a sweater and a pair of jeans on the bed. "There's no way any of my shoes will fit your feet."

"I can ask Lisa to bring me a pair," Annalise answers, trying her hardest to look at anything but Eve. She tugs her towel a little tighter around her. "Thanks for the clothes."

"No problem," Eve says, before slipping into the bathroom. This is the last thing she says to Annalise until they get in the car. It was silent in the apartment when they'd gotten dressed, and then loud for a moment when Annalise called Lisa - who was very unhappy that she hadn't called to check in last night, and then quiet again when Eve had given Annalise a granola bar for breakfast. It's Annalise who finally breaks the silence on the way back to Harvard.

"Are we going to finish our discussion?" she asks, looking at Eve, who's eyes are focused on the road ahead.

"I thought we did," Eve says. "You don't want a relationship, but I do."  
"I had a good time last night," Annalise tries. "I like where we are now."

"I know," Eve says, and Annalise sees her purse her lip. "But I don't. I want more. I want the entire relationship thing. Don't get me wrong, I've had hookups and things before, but that's not what I want now; not with you."  
Eve's candor surprises Annalise. She frowns slightly.

"Why not?"

"What do you mean why not?"

"Why don't you just want to casually hook up?" Annalise clarifies. "I've never done it before, but it doesn't seem like the worst thing." Eve scoffs.

"You're serious?" she asks, glancing at Annalise doubtfully. "You know why."

"Tell me," Annalise says, crossing her arms. Eve's face twists up. For a second, Annalise thinks she's going to give her a real answer. But then they pull into a parking spot and Eve shrugs as she puts the car in park.

"It's not important."

When they get out of the car, they walk side by side to class, but they don't walk _together._ In that moment, Annalise realizes that she had lost Eve already.

* * *

That night, Eve doesn't call Annalise. When Annalise tries to call, there's no answer. She ends up going to bed feeling empty. But she's sure she'll get used to it because she and Eve don't talk for a week. Then it's two weeks. And then she decides to stop keeping count because she's making herself miserable.

This is all her fault, she knows. She was the one who was always pushing Eve away. It would also be so easy to fix this. So easy to tell Eve that she had messed up and that she missed her terribly and wanted to be together. She did want that, in a way. There was nothing to lose now.

She doesn't go to Eve, though. She feels like she can't. She looks at her in class sometimes and watches the way she focuses on her papers and tugs on a lock of her hair when she can't think. Everything she did was endearing, loveable. She was too good for Annalise and Annalise had known that from the start. So she had blown it, and now it was too late. In the long run, Annalise was sure it wouldn't matter. Eve was one girl who she had been close with for all of 6 months. Maybe that was all they'd ever have between them. Just because they had slept together didn't mean they were meant to be. This is what Annalise tells herself anyway. Sometimes it works and she can keep herself from thinking about Eve. Other times, mostly late at night, the enormity of how much she misses her takes over and it feels like someone is twisting her heart in her chest.

Kim and Lisa notice this, and so eventually they decide to all go out to dinner one Friday night to try and have some fun. While Annalise had never directly told Lisa what was wrong, she was sure she had an idea. She'd tried to set her up with a few guys, but Annalise hadn't been interested in any. They were all attractive and smart, but no one had really made her laugh. No one had dragged her out on the dance floor or remembered her drink order after an hour. No one was Eve.

The restaurant they choose is a soul food place on a street corner in Boston, with red and yellow lights and neon signs everywhere. They get a booth with a view of the door, and that doesn't seem very important until right after they've gotten their food and the little bell chimes. Then Annalise looks up and sees _her._ Eve, in a short navy colored dress paired with tights and boots. Her hair is in a ponytail again. Annalise's eyes search for the charm on her necklace, but she can't see it from here. Something else grabs her attention when she looks away. Eve has come with someone else. She's a shorter girl, white with messy dreadlocks and baggy pants that sit low on her hips. Annalise wouldn't have pegged her as Eve's type, but then again she wouldn't have pegged _herself_ as Eve's type either. Her eyes follow them as they sit down, lingering on the wide smile on Eve's face. Annalise's stomach flips and she forces herself to look back down at her plate. Eve was not hers. She could go out with whomever she wanted. Annalise just wished that it didn't make her feel so sick.

For the rest of her meal, Annalise can't concentrate on anything but Eve and that girl, laughing and talking across the restaurant. Twice, the girl reaches out and touches Eve's wrist. Both times, Annalise flinches at her own table. With every second, she starts to dislike the girl a little more. She dislikes her eyeliner, and how well it highlights her blue eyes. She dislikes her band t-shirt, and how she'd brought a book to dinner. And she especially dislikes the way she's smiling at Eve right now. This is insane, she knows. She's not being reasonable. But every time she sees Eve smile at her in that tender way that used to be reserved for her, she feels like she's about to puke.

"Are you okay, girl?" asks Kim, frowning as she pops a fry into her mouth. Annalise drags her eyes back to her friends, finding that Lisa is looking at her too.

"I'm fine," she says, looking back down at the fried chicken on her plate. The few bites she'd taken had been delicious, but her appetite had disappeared.

"You keep looking behind us," Lisa said after a moment, obviously not satisfied with Annalise's answer. "What's back there?"

Lisa turns around to look for herself after saying this, despite Annalise nearly kicking her under the table. She holds her hand up to cover her face, but Lisa has already seen exactly what Annalise does.

"Annalise, if that's bothering you, you need to go over there and say something," Lisa says, raising an eyebrow.

"If what's bothering you?" Kim says, looking back herself. "There's no one we know over there." Lisa raises an eyebrow at this statement but doesn't say anything. Annalise huffs. She wishes for a minute that Lisa wasn't so smart.

"Nothing's bothering me," she says, stabbing at her macaroni and cheese. But Lisa has already turned to the side in her seat so she can watch Eve and the girl's conversation.

"She's leaving now," Lisa says. This, of course, makes Annalise look up again, and she sees the girl with the dreads smile and stand up before leaving. Eve looks like she's nearly ready to go as well, eating the last bits of the pie she'd ordered on the side.

"Are you going over there or not?" Lisa asks impatiently, raising an eyebrow at Annalise. "We won't wait up."

"Wait up for what?" Kim asks desperately, confusion strewn all over her face. Annalise sighs and looks at her plate, then Lisa, then Eve, then back at Lisa again. Finally, she grabs her bag and scootches out of her booth.

"If this goes bad I'm blaming you," she says under her breath as she pulls a few bills from her bag and sets them on the table. As she walks past Lisa. Lisa just gives a little _hmph_ and watches as Annalise makes her way over to Eve's table.

"Hey, Eve?" Annalise says, stepping up beside her. Eve looks up from her plate, a small crumb on the corner of her red mouth and offers Annalise a wide smile that almost knocks Annalise off of her feet.

"Hey, Annalise!" she says, wiping her mouth quickly with her napkin after setting down her fork. She's being a lot friendlier than Annalise had expected her to be. "Have you been in here? I didn't see you come in."

"I was here with Kim and Lisa," Annalise says slowly, nodding at her friends' table. But when she looks over, the table is empty and she just sees them disappearing out of the side door.

"They have somewhere to go?" Eve says, tilting her head slightly, a hint of a smile on her lips. Annalise's stomach flip flops and she hates the way it feels. Eve had definitely caught her off guard.

"I guess so," Annalise says, rubbing her left arm.

"Well, do you want a ride home? I wasn't planning on going anywhere after this," Eve says, already taking money out of her wallet and leaving it on the table.

"Sure, that'd be great."

* * *

The ride back to Annalise's dorm is a silent one. Eve does walk her up to her room, however, and as Annalise fiddles with her keys, she finally gets the courage to ask:

"You wanna come inside?"

Eve smiles at this request and answers with a quiet "yes" and Annalise lets her in. Lisa doesn't appear to be back yet. She must have known to stay out of the dorm tonight.

Eventually, Eve and Annalise end up the couch, with one of Lisa's fruity wine coolers in each of their hands. It's a bit sweet for Annalise, but Eve seems to like it.

"So, you were with someone tonight," Annalise says slowly, trying her hardest to sound casual. "Who was she?"

"Someone I met at the bookstore," Eve answers, sipping the pink drink in her hand. "Her name is Michelle. She's nice."

"Are you guys dating then, or?" Annalise starts to asks, her head down. But Eve interrupts by giggling softly.

"Wouldn't you like to know, huh?" she says. Her voice is gentle, teasing. When Annalise looks up, she's smiling tenderly.

"I'm just asking," Annalise tries, picking at one of the couch cushions.

"I'm not seeing anyone," Eve says, shaking her head slightly. "Not her or anyone else."

"Good," Annalise breathes. She is relieved.

"Good?" Eve repeats, her tone expressing her confusion. "I don't see why you'd be worried."

She only has to look at Annalise's face to know she's right - Annalise _had_ been worried. The thing was, it didn't make sense for Annalise to even care. She had been the one to stop things before they got too serious. She'd told her everything that she wanted and Annalise had basically told her that she didn't want a relationship.

"Annalise, we haven't really talked about what happened that night-"

"So we had sex, it wasn't a big deal."

"Well, maybe not to you."

Eve's voice has raised slightly and she sets down her wine cooler. She is frustrated, and Annalise knows exactly why. Because something important definitely had happened. It had completely decimated their relationship. It had been a big deal, and it had been one of the best nights of her life, but that scared the hell out of her. Almost everything concerning Eve scared her. Annalise had thought until tonight that she lost her, and even the fact that she was sitting with her now was a surprise. She needed to be better, more gentle. She knew that. Looking at Eve's face, pink with anger, made her realize that.

"I understand if you don't want to do it again, alright?" Eve says, lowering her voice. "But I had a good time and it seemed like you did too. I obviously was mistaken about your intentions for the future, and so I won't push that, but you can't just pretend like something didn't happen." While Eve talks, Annalise sets her drink down and faces her, inching closer. She wants to deny it. Say that she didn't really have a good time and that the sex had just been sex. But it wasn't, so she couldn't. It had been her first time and it had been nice and exciting and so much more. She swallows.

"I know something happened," she says quietly. "And I had a good time." Eve's eyebrows raise a little.

"But we don't want the same things," Eve says and Annalise frowns and glances down. "I wanted be in a real relationship. You said that morning that you weren't sure what you wanted, and then you never said anything else about it."

"You stopped calling," Annalise says suddenly. "You stopped calling, and I figured that meant that you were done with me." Eve purses her lips and shakes her head slightly.

"Annalise," she says, her voice cracking a little. "Annalise, I don't know if I could ever just be _done_ with you. I know we haven't known each other for that long, but I don't think that I've ever met someone that makes me feel the way you do."

"When you stopped calling, I thought I'd wrecked everything," Annalise says, suddenly hopeful. "So I didn't bother trying to tell you that I'd reconsidered."

"Reconsidered what exactly?"

"I would be lucky to be with you," Annalise says slowly. "I know that you would be a good girlfriend."

"So what are you saying?" Eve asks quietly.

"I really miss you, Eve," Annalise finishes. There's a pause. Then carefully, Eve raises her right hand to caress Annalise's cheek. Annalise relaxes into the touch immediately and lets out a shaky breath.

"I miss you, too, Annalise," Eve admits. She and Annalise look at each other for a second. And with their eyes, they make a decision. Immediately, Eve leans forward and crashes her lips again Annalise's, who hungrily accepts with a partially open mouth. They kiss like this for a few seconds before Eve decides she needs Annalise closer, and so she pulls her towards her until she's moved into Eve's lap, their chests pressed together. Annalise's kisses are rushed and demanding. Kissing Eve again makes her realize exactly how much she missed her. She wants Eve. She has wanted Eve ever since she got that first taste of her on the 15th. And so when Eve starts to kiss her neck and ear, she lets out a quiet sigh of approval and allows her body to reacts. Eve's hands on her waist have made her chest feel harder. Goosebumps raise on her skin and she sighs again as Eve presses kisses to her jawline. Annalise lets her arms wrap around Eve's waist as Eve raises her lips back to her own and kisses her again. Eve's hands travel up Annalise's sweater, and run over her chest, causing Annalise to bite down on her bottom lip.

"Bedroom," Annalise murmurs, wondering about Lisa . The chances that she would come home were slim, but Annalise didn't want to embarrass Eve if she did. Eve seems to understand.

"Do we need to put a sock on the door?" she asks, sounding concerned, and Annalise can't help but let out a burst of surprised laughter.

"Don't be such a dork," she whispers before rubbing Eve's cheek and kissing her again deeply.. "On second thought, screw the bedroom. I want you now."

"What if Lisa comes in?" Eve asks, kissing Annalise back, running her hands over her chest again. "She'll see."

"So let her see," Annalise murmurs. When she kisses Eve again, she's laughing. Eve chuckles softly and squirms as Annalise kisses her neck. When she opens her eyes, she sees Eve's chain tucked into her dress. Biting her lip, she leans back a bit and pulls it out. She sees the charm on the end sparkle and she smiles a little.

"See," Eve says quietly, blushing slightly. "I didn't ever stop thinking about you."

Annalise smiles.


	15. Cornrows and Drunk Confessions

_**Hey guys! A guest reviewer reminded me that it's been a year since I started this story. Of course, I haven't gotten as far as I would have liked to, but this is honestly the longest I've ever stuck with a story. So of course, I'd like to thank all of you for spurring me on and leaving reviews that encourage me to keep writing. This is a bit of a fluffy chapter, but I figure you all deserve it. While this chapter doesn't contain sex (sorry!) there is a little scene where we get to see Annalise and Eve in public. The ending is my personal favorite; I've had Eve's line in my head since I first began this story. That's enough introduction though, enjoy!**_

Annalise wakes up in her dorm bed on Saturday alone. Her first instinct is to reach out for Eve, but when she opens her eyes, she's not there. She sits up, glancing around a bit tiredly before rubbing her eyes.

"Eve?" she calls, sliding out of bed. She grabs an oversized tee from the nearest drawer and slips it on, as well as a pair of underwear. "You still here?" Her heart drops for a moment when she doesn't hear a response, but then she steps out of her room and sees Eve and Lisa at the couch. Lisa is sitting on the sofa with Eve, dressed in a t-shirt and pair of shorts from Annalise's drawer, on the floor between her legs. When Annalise steps closer, she sees that half of Eve's hair is in cornrows and Lisa is working on the rest.

"Oh god," Annalise says, biting down on her bottom lip to keep herself from laughing. "What's going on here?"

"It's kind of a long story," Eve says before wincing slightly. Lisa huffs a little.

"Stop moving your head so much!" she chides. Eve mouths _it hurts,_ but Annalise only raises her eyebrows and grins. "When I came in this morning, Eve was already up waiting for you, eating all of our Cap'n Crunch. We started talking about how I'm going to pay for school and stuff, and so she asked if I have any special skills. I said I was pretty good at doing hair, but that I needed practice. She said I could start on her."

"You volunteered for this?" Annalise asks, teasing. Eve shrugs and Lisa huffs again.

"Sorry!" she says, before answering Annalise. "I guess so. I haven't seen it. Does it look bad?"

"No," Lisa answers, shooting a look at Annalise, who _hmphs_ before entering the kitchen and opening the fridge to grab the chocolate sauce and milk. Eve watches as she makes herself a glass of chocolate milk.

"I didn't think you were a big fan of chocolate," she says, adjusting her legs carefully so that Lisa doesn't scold her again. Annalise starts to answer, but Lisa chuckles.

"Not as big a fan as you are," she murmurs. Annalise's mouth drops open and she hurls the closest thing to her at Lisa. Unfortunately, this is only a plastic spoon, and so not much damage is done. Lisa giggles as she moves on to the next braid. Eve's cheeks flush.

"So you told her about us then?" Annalise says, talking to Eve. She's not nearly as nervous as she'd imagined she'd be, saying "us" out loud. Eve starts to shake her head but then remembers that she shouldn't be moving.

"Not really," she says. "I figured you did."

"And I figured it out all on my own," Lisa answers, looking proud. "You weren't too slick about it anyways. Even Kim's going to catch on eventually."

Annalise glances at Eve. She knows they still haven't had a full-on conversation about what they were, but she wanted to have it now before she got scared and started overthinking everything. Lisa seems to sense this as well, and she quickens her pace so that she can finish the next braid.

"There," she says a few seconds later, smoothing down Eve's hair slightly. "You look good. Like Juliette Lewis."

"Is that a compliment?" Eve asks, worry covering her face. Annalise grins and sips her milk before shrugging sheepishly.

"Of sorts," Lisa says. "You can look in the bathroom." Eve stands up and heads into the bathroom, and Annalise chuckles when she hears her gasp. She makes a face at Lisa, who sticks her tongue out.

"Wow," Eve says stepping out. "I'm surprised."

"You don't have to keep them in," Annalise says. She's quickly shushed by Lisa.

"You don't have to take them out either," she adds, standing up and stretching. "Anyways, I just came by to grab a few things and shower. I'll be out of your hair soon."

"Actually, I was thinking I'd get ready to head back to my place," Eve says. "You can come if you want, Annalise."

Lisa slips into her room and Annalise smiles, finishing what's left in her glass.

"Sure," she says. "Let's just get dressed first." She throws her cup in the trash before leading Eve back to her room. As soon as they step in and she closes the door, she starts giggling.

"Oh c'mon," Eve says, but Annalise just shakes her head and laughs harder. "Is it bad that I don't hate them?"

"Please, take them out," she says, giggling as she turns around and looks around in her drawer for a pair of pants. "I can't take you seriously."

Eve chuckles as she hops onto Annalise's bed and starts to take her hair out, biting her lip a bit as Annalise starts to pull on a pair of leggings.

"I did it for you," she says, rolling her eyes playfully. "I wanted to finally meet your friends."

"Well that's sweet," Annalise says, chuckling as she talks "You didn't have to do that to yourself, though. Did it hurt that bad? You looked like you were in pain."

"It really did," Eve says, pulling a face. Annalise giggles and stands on her toes quickly to cup Eve's cheeks and kiss her quickly. It _was_ sweet for Eve to want to spend time with Lisa. Eve smiles and kisses her back quickly before continuing to take out the tight braids in her hair. When she finishes, she hops off of the bed and strips out of Annalise's clothes. This, of course, catches Annalise's eyes and Eve smiles a bit when she catches her watching. "You hate it when I stare at you. Why is it okay for you to stare at me?"

"I used to hate it," Annalise corrects, putting on socks and shoes. "It's not so bad now." Eve pulls on her clothes from last night, which are scattered across the bedroom floor. Annalise smiles a little as she thinks back to last night. Eve was definitely amazing in bed. That was something she would never have to worry about. She slips into the bathroom to freshen up while Eve finishes getting dressed. "You mind if I shower at your place?"

"Not at all," Eve answers. "You ready?"

"Let's go."

* * *

After getting to Eve's apartment and showering, she and Annalise sit on the couch, cuddling and watching old episodes of _Ren and Stimpy._ Eventually, at a commercial break, Eve speaks up, deciding to address the elephant that's been in the room for weeks now.

"So," she says, running a hand through Annalise's hair. Annalise raises her head from its place in Eve's lap to look at her. "I have something to admit."

"Yeah?" Annalise encourages, sitting up completely. Eve glances down a bit.

"After you took me out for my birthday, you asked me what made me like you," she says slowly. "And then what made me talk to you on the first day. And I said that you surprised me. But that wasn't all of it."

"What do you mean?"

"The first day of school wasn't really my first day seeing you," Eve explains, watching as Annalise's eyebrows raise in surprise. "Around a week before classes started, I went to the library to get a book we needed for class. You were in there with Lisa. She was asking to leave; do you remember?"

Annalise shakes her head, dumbfounded, so Eve continues.

"She was complaining, saying that you had been in the library for hours and that she was hungry. And I think you said something about her only eating vegetables or something and made a joke. But eventually, you told her that you didn't want to leave because you were afraid that you weren't going to be prepared. You said you were scared that you were going to get in class and find out that law wasn't the right path for you."

Annalise remembered.

" _What if I'm not a good lawyer, Lisa?" she asked, looking up from the table in front of her, full of books and old news articles from Harvard's archives. "What if I never win? What if I turn into a horrible person? Some of these lawyers are bastards, awful people..."_

 _She'd trailed off as she pushed the newspaper photocopy in her hands away._

" _I want to do good. I mean, sometimes, people really deserve to be in jail. What if I can't do that? I could just end up being as bad as the people in these papers, and then what? I don't want that. I want to be the best lawyer there ever was, but sometimes it seems like such a huge task."_

"Lisa reassured you. She said you were a good person, and that you would make a great lawyer. You calmed down pretty quickly and I think you left right after that."

"So that's why you sat next to me?" Annalise asks. Eve shrugs a little.

"Not exactly," she says. "I sat next to you because you looked familiar. I didn't remember where I'd seen you before until that night. But that's why I asked you out for lunch when I saw you at the grocery store. I figured that anybody that cared so much about being good was someone that I wanted in my life."

"I think you give me too much credit," Annalise answers, even though Eve's words bring butterflies to her stomach. "I'm not that good of a person."

"Well, I think you are," Eve says, smiling a little as she strokes Annalise's cheek. "Maybe that's just because I like you, but I don't care." Annalise pauses after she says this. Eve always surprises her. She couldn't believe she still liked her sometimes. It didn't make any sense, with all of the times that Annalise had pushed her away and stopped talking to her. The last time, she had almost been sure that Eve wouldn't be able to forgive her. She had really messed up. But here she was, letting her know that she'd wanted Annalise in her life since the first time she saw her and that causes some feeling that Annalise doesn't quite recognize to flood through her body. Eve notices this and tilts her head, trailing her fingers over Annalise's cheek. "What is it?"

"I want to be your girlfriend," Annalise says, so quickly that she doesn't even think about it. She swears she can almost see Eve stop breathing. "I know I freaked out the other day, and I apologize for that. I do want to be with you. It would make me very happy."

"Do you mean that?" Eve breathes, her voice quiet. She inhales shakily and wiggles a little closer to Annalise. "I don't want you to feel like you have to say that because of what happened last night. I understand-"

"It's what I want," Annalise says, her voice more assured now. "Eve, I've never met anyone like you. I'm sure about this." Eve exhales shakily, and Annalise sees her eyes tear up automatically, a wide smile spreading onto her face.

"Oh," she says, sounding surprised. A tear runs down her face and she wipes at it quickly. "I'm crying, god, I'm such a loser." Annalise smiles at this, slipping her arms around Eve's neck and kissing her deeply. Eve kisses back, wrapping her arms around Annalise. By the time they pull back, they're both breathing heavily.

"So?" Annalise asks, wiping another tear from Eve's cheek. "Will you be my girlfriend?"

"Of course," Eve answers, already pulling Annalise in for another kiss. "Of course I will, Annalise."

This is the beginning of what is arguably the best day of Eve's life.

* * *

For the rest of the day, Eve's arms stay around Annalise's waist. Sometime around 12, Eve notices that Annalise has fallen asleep. She quickly turns the TV off before slipping out from underneath Annalise and kissing her forehead quickly before heading to her bedroom to make a call.

Her brother picks up on the third ring. He's probably afraid that something was wrong. She never just called to talk. No one in her family did really.

"Hello?" he asks, sounding concerned.

"Michael," she says in an excited whisper. "It's Eve. Guess who just started dating her longtime crush?"  
"Oh god, you and Annalise?" he says, sounding just as excited as Eve feels. "I'm so happy for you, Eve."

"I'm so happy, too," Eve says softly, smiling as she twists the phone cord around. "I can't even believe it."

"I'm surprised it took so long," Michael says. "You were all over each other at break."

"Shut up," Eve says, giggling softly. "I'm just glad it happened."

"I really am happy for you," Michael assures. "She seems like a really great girl. Smart. Emily still asks about her sometimes. She wants to see both of you again soon; we might have to get together before Christmas.

"That sounds nice," Eve answers, leaning against her headboard. "And Annalise is smart and great, but she's also so much more. Honestly, Michael, I can't remember when I last felt _this_ happy."

"You sound very excited," Michael says, chuckling on the other end of the line. "You have to tell Dad tomorrow. He'll be happy. He told me that he hoped you all ended up together soon."

"I didn't want to call so late," Eve says, and Michael snorts. "I know, I called you, though. But I had to tell someone, you know how long I've been waiting for this."  
"I know," Michael says. "It's good that you all are together. Tell Annalise I said congratulations."

"Thanks," Eve says softly, smiling still. "Bye."

"Bye," Michael answers.

* * *

On Monday, Eve takes Annalise to class. They sit together, despite the waves and confused looks Eve gets from the girls that she normally sits next to. Lisa offers a thumbs up, and Kim, who _finally_ understands gives them a wide smile.

"You ready?" Eve asks after the professor dismisses class. Annalise looks at her before taking a deep breath and nodding. She tries to sound confident when she answers, but her voice shakes a little anyways.

"Yeah," she says softly, putting her backpack on. Eve smiles encouragingly and grabs her bag before offering her free hand to Annalise, who takes it.

They walk out of class holding hands. They'd decided that this was enough PDA to show the other students that they were together. Annalise hadn't thought that they needed to tell anyone at all, but Eve had wanted to and so she had agreed with only a little grumbling. As they head down the pavement, they get a few glances, but not much else. At least until a couple of boys in suits pass by, and they stop as they glance down at their hands then back at Annalise and Eve.

"What?" Eve asks, her voice sounding slightly annoyed. Annalise squeezes her hand.

"Nothing," one of the boys answers, sounding a bit shy.

"That's just cool," the other one answers, tugging the first's sleeve. "Really cool."

Then they keep walking. Eve glances at Annalise, who is smiling. She giggles softly.

"Wow," Annalise says as they head towards their next class. "I've always wanted to be cool." Eve rolls her eyes.

"Shut up," she says. Annalise can hear how happy she is without even looking at her though. She hopes that Eve feels just as carefree and excited as she does. She has never had this type of confidence before, but it was addictive. She never wanted to go back.

* * *

The weeks pass by with no problems, to both Eve and Annalise's surprise. Eve had expected Annalise to freak out at least once, and to be honest, Annalise didn't even trust herself to last for a month. But they had. They celebrate a one month anniversary, then a two month anniversary and Annalise's happiness only continues to increase. She's a little afraid, somewhere deep down, that one day she's going to reach her peak and she won't even know it. But so far, things with Eve only get better and better. They go out on dates: bowling, to the park, and dancing of course. Things are different now, but in the best way possible. When they dance together, Annalise's hands know exactly where to go. When they ride the subway home, she doesn't have to worry about what will happen when they get to Eve's apartment. She doesn't have to worry if someone looks at Eve for a little too long. There is nothing to be afraid of anymore because Eve is _hers_. She has never given Annalise a reason to doubt that.

Eve is surprised by how quickly the months pass. Honestly, she wishes that time would slow down just a little so that she had the time to cherish every moment, as corny as that sounded. She and Annalise are like they were at the beginning of the year again, except, for now, half of the time they spent together was spent kissing and touching and doing _other_ things and it was all absolutely perfect.

Eve could tell Annalise's mood as soon as she walked in the room. She knew when she wanted to kiss her, or when she was worried about saying something. She knew when to expect a quickie in between classes. She knew her getting ready routine in the morning routine and what side of the bed she liked to sleep on. While this excited her, it also made her worried because she knew that in a few weeks, the school year would end and Annalise would go back to Georgia because there was nothing keeping her here. Eve was going to miss her, really miss her. Part of her had wondered about asking Annalise if she wanted to stay in Boston in her apartment, but she was almost sure that Annalise would freak out if she acted like she wanted to move in together after not even 3 full months of dating. So instead of coming right out and saying she wanted Annalise to stay, she dropped hints about law offices around town looking for help. Of course, the one that she mentions most is the immigration law office where she's already been hired as an intern for the summer. She doesn't even think Annalise is really listening until she speaks up one night in late April while they're in bed, around a week before exams and the end of the school year.

"The office that you work at offered me a job," she says quietly. "I don't know if we'd be working on the same things, but I had an interview last week and they told me they'd like me there."

"You didn't tell me!" Eve says, twisting out of Annalise's arms and turning on her side to look at her fully. Annalise wasn't really one for a lot of PDA, she'd learned that. But at night, when it was just the two of them in Eve's apartment, Annalise would snuggle up to Eve and wrap her arms around her tightly and intertwine their legs. Eve lived for those nights, and she already missed the physical contact. "Are you taking it?"

"I don't know," Annalise says, looking away to avoid Eve's intense gaze. "Probably not. I don't have anywhere to stay in Boston and my family's already expecting me home for the summer."

"So stay here," Eve says, trying her hardest to sound casual. "I mean, I have an extra room. You're here all the time anyways, you already know where everything is." She can't help but smile a bit as Annalise pauses, thinking.

"I couldn't ask you to do that," she says finally. "I couldn't afford it anyways."

"You wouldn't have to worry about that," Eve says. "My father takes care of everything. It doesn't matter if there're one or two people living here."

"You know how I feel about that," Annalise says carefully. Eve reaches over and slides her hand into Annalise's, squeezing gently.

"I know," she says softly, remembering Annalise asking why Eve always wanted to pay for things all those months ago. "It's not charity, I swear, okay? What if you just stayed her for rent free for a month while you got everything together? Then after you save up from working, you can start paying half the rent."

"I don't know," Annalise says. Eve exhales softly and Annalise looks up at her. She looks so hopeful, so optimistic. "You want me to stay?"

"I really do," Eve says softly. Her cheeks flush and Annalise chuckles but Eve knows that it's more than just her average amount of embarrassment. She had really been worried about Annalise leaving. It could cause their budding relationship to come to a halt, and that was the last thing she wanted. Every moment with Annalise made life worth living. She was beginning to think more and more that she didn't just _like_ her. It had grown into so much more than that. They were almost inseparable, eating together, spending the night together whenever possible, talking on the phone when they were apart. Eve knew she was annoying to the other people that she'd used to hang out with, but she didn't care. Because as soon as Annalise had asked to be her girlfriend, she became Eve's entire world.

That wasn't what happened when you just liked someone. Eve knew what she felt, but she refused to let herself even think it. If there was a surefire way to make Annalise leave the relationship as quickly as possible, opening her mouth and saying what she was pretty sure she felt was it. Annalise is scanning her face now and Eve can feel her looking for more of an explanation. Eve doesn't offer one up, and so it's Annalise who speaks next.

"I'll think about it."

* * *

This is how she ends up moving her things into Eve's apartment on the day after their last exam. She didn't own many things, and Eve only lived on the second floor, so it didn't take very long to get all of her belongings up and into the apartment. It's around 7 o'clock in the evening when they finish reorganizing everything. They had decided to order a pizza and now they sat on Eve's living room floor, eating.

"I can't believe we made it to the end of the school year," Eve says, munching on the slice in her hands. "We should celebrate."

"How?" Annalise asks, laying back and stretching. She yawns a little and Eve smiles softly.

"The same way we celebrate everything," she says, standing up and heading into the kitchen. When she comes back, she has a bottle of vodka in one hand and two glasses in the other. "With alcohol."

She sits down and hands Annalise a glass, pouring a good amount of alcohol in it. Annalise hesitates at first, but then she rolls her eyes and throws the drink back. The warm feeling it causes when it settles in her stomach isn't half bad. She deserved a chance to relax after all, especially after just finishing her first year of law school.

As they pass the bottle back and forth, it becomes much easier to relax. It's Eve who first asks "truth or dare" and then suddenly they're in a game of drunken truth or dare that seems to involve a lot of making out. At one point, Annalise's lips find a sensitive spot on Eve's neck that makes Eve's body jolt in pleasure. Eventually, they both mellow down and Eve finds herself in a sweet, kind of peaceful stage of intoxication.

"Truth or dare?" she asks again. Annalise pauses for a while before responding.

"Truth," she says, then giggles. Eve giggles too for some reason, and then they're both laughing hysterically.

"Okay," Eve says, catching her breath. "Okay. Do you believe in love at first sight?"

"No way," Annalise answers, shaking her head from her spot next to Eve. Her clarity surprises Eve. "That doesn't make any sense. Maybe lust at first sight. It's hard to love someone without knowing anything at all about them."

Eve makes a noise, and Annalise can't tell if she's agreeing or disagreeing. So she props herself up on her elbow and looks at Eve.

"What about you?" she asks, sounding curious. "Do you believe in love at first sight?" Eve barely thinks before answering.

"Yes."

"Why?"

Again, she voices her answer before her brain can even process what she's saying.

"Because that's what happened when I first met you."

Annalise is quiet for awhile. So quiet that Eve begins to panic, sitting up and crossing her legs. Before she can backtrack, Annalise speaks up.

"Really?"

She sounds happy. Eve can't believe it. It takes her a second to remember how to breathe, but then she's nodding, nodding so fast that her head starts to spin.

"Really," she repeats. Annalise looks at her. Then she grins. Her white teeth gleam like the sun coming out from behind a cloud.

"How can you be sure?" she asks. It almost sounds like she's teasing. "You're drunk." Eve giggles and Annalise laughs, too.

"I am," she answers. "But I know. I've known for a long time now."

"Since when?" Annalise asks. Eve has to think back, or at least try to navigate through the clouds in her mind, searching for the moment when she first knew that she had absolutely fallen in love with Annalise.

"Winter break," she says. "When I was driving to get you. I knew that even a great friend wouldn't do that. I came to get you because I was worried, but also because I missed you and I was selfish." Annalise scoffs.

"You are not selfish," she says, waving Eve off with her hand. "You are a lot of things, but selfish is not one of them."

"I knew it when we kissed, too," Eve says, still caught up in her memories. "The first time, and then the morning after. Kissing has never felt like that before."

"It's different when you love someone," Annalise says, the advice coming from some part of her brain that she hasn't used for awhile. "It's like this feeling that you can't breathe."

"Like time stops and you're going to be in that moment forever," Eve continues, a slight smile on her face. The more she thinks about it, the truer the statement becomes. She loves Annalise. She has always loved Annalise. She will always love Annalise.

"It makes your heart swell until it feels like it's gonna burst out of your chest," Annalise, running her hand over her throat as if she could stop the feeling that she was describing.

She couldn't love Eve. It had only been a few months. They'd met in late August and it was only May now. How long did it take to fall in love really? Could it only take 9 months? Annalise looks up at Eve now, her eyes scanning the features that she knew so well. The ponytail, the sculptured collarbone, the arched eyebrows, the lips that always seemed to be upturned in a sly smile, the golden eyes, the long fingers that grazed over her skin and gave her goosebumps...

"Annalise," Eve says, bringing her back to the situation at hand. Eve is smiling still, motioning at the bottle sitting between them. "We've had a lot to drink. This doesn't have to mean anything. We can just forget tonight."  
"Right," Annalise says, smiling back. Eve stands up, wobbling a little as she heads towards the bathroom. Annalise watches her go.

She'd said that it didn't have to mean anything, but didn't it? Eve had told her she loved her. And Annalise wanted it to be true.

 _Because that's what happened when I first met you._

Annalise lays back on Eve's carpet, which feels softer and softer after every drink. She was loved. The thought makes her giggle and she has to force herself to stay quiet so that she doesn't scare Eve.

 _When I first met you_.

Annalise's opinion on love at first sight hadn't changed. But that didn't matter because Eve loved her now, right at this moment. And Annalise loved her back.


End file.
